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Malicious Compliance
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People conforming to the letter, but not the spirit, of a request.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/CondessaStace on 2024-04-13 19:11:48.
Tldr MC at the very end.
A few years ago I got a new phone. I let the vendor set all of the notifications since I wasn't and still am not really into phones - talking or texting - and it seemed easier to let him do it.
At the time I had a desk job and I would set my alarm to go off to remind me to do some walking during my breaks, otherwise I would sit all day and have noodle legs while trying to get home at the end of the day.
So the day after I bought my phone I go to work. Morning break I remembered without needing the alarm so I shut it down before it could sound off. Lunch comes and goes. So then it gets to be late afternoon. My Office Partner and I are in our after lunch slow down. Not quite sleepy, but less than alert. Then my phone alarm goes off.
After Office Partner and I peeled ourselves off the ceiling I frantically pawed at the phone for awhile before finding the shut off for the alarm. The vendor had set all the notifications to Reveille. You know, the Army wake up trumpet song...
I apologized to my Office Partner over and over again "WTF Condessa? TF?" And let him watch while I figured out how to change all of the notification settings to something less ... alarming.
I set it to crickets. I thought the sound was annoying enough to get me up and walking and nobody is afraid of crickets so I was safe there. Or so I thought. Office Partner and I got a kick out of telling that story every chance we got and it always got a laugh. Until...
One Friday evening I was leaving late, In the elevator with some other stragglers and I get one of my rare texts. Granted it sounded really loud in that tiny elevator but I was shocked to see mean girl sneers on everyone's faces. One of the ladies says, "That's your ringtone?" "Yes." and I tell the story of how it came to be the default and end with "because nobody is afraid of crickets." More sneers and a sulky, "some people are afraid of crickets," from the back. Then the one who spoke up, I guess she was the leader or whatever begins to tell me how to change the volume and ringtone so as not to upset others. I'm not a phone person so I would have been fine with that. The problem was that she added condescending to the sneer. That opened it up for the rest of the women to ramp up the sneers and condescending remarks. I basically shut down at that point because watching a bunch of 30 somethings turn into high school mean girls was freaking me out. Over a ringtone.
Monday morning rolls around and I get called into my supervisor's office. She looked very, very embarrassed. So embarrassed that it took her a few tries to get out what she had to say. Apparently the mean girls had complained to their boss about my vile ringtone and insisted that she do something about it. She complained to my boss. And my boss had lower seniority...She basically apologized for making me change my ringtone.
So I went back to my office and told Office Partner the whole story. We stared at each other for a few moments before we started laughing. "I know what you are going to do, Condessa, go for it."
Then I changed all of the notifications back to Reveille.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/ladynutbar on 2024-04-13 16:31:19.
I work somewhere that sells pizza. At my store we do not get the veggies pre cut, we cut them by hand (minus the mushrooms and black olives). This includes lettuce, tomato, green peppers, and onions.
A customer ordered taco pizza, it is topped with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, and chip crumbles.
He called in after getting home to yell at an employee about the size of the cut lettuce. Then he came in and threw an absolute tantrum over the lettuce. Like full on meltdown, cussing at the employees, yelling at other guests who were telling him to calm the eff down.
Well last night he ordered again. In all caps in the notes (he ordered online) he wrote "CUT THE FUVKING LETTUCE SMALLER!!!"
Aight...bet. Cue malicious compliance.I took the measured amount of lettuce out and minced the fuck out of it. It was basically lettuce confetti when I was done. Topped his pizza. He checked it before he left and said "are you fucking serious? This is ridiculous. I'm NOT paying for this and I'm never coming back again!! You people are fucking stupid! I'm calling corporate!"
To begin with it was like 1inx2in so not even that big at all. Literally no one else has ever complained. And the order description says chopped lettuce not shredded so we're cutting it to spec anyway.
One of our teenage employees quipped to me that if he thinks the lettuce is sooooo big they feel sorry for his wife 😆😆
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Silent_Layer3370 on 2024-04-13 03:59:52.
Story from my grandfather's time in the RAAF.
He was a heavy mechanic / transport officer. Worked around a lot of heavy machinery and did maintenance on runways.
He was assigned to a base on a pacific island somewhere and he was working on a bulldozer in one of their maintenance sheds.
An uppity just out of duntroon Lieutenant walked up to him and demanded that he level a field with the bulldozer as they were preparing for an exercise. He told him to "Level that field and level every god damn thing on that field"
My grandfather replied that he wasn't trained in the use of the bulldozer, he was just repairing a part on it.
The Lieutenant snacked back and said "A commanding officer just gave you an order, now get in that bulldozer and level that field."
Pop though, fuck it, what's the worst that could happen and he jumped up in that dozer and started leveling the field.
Here's where it got malicious.
In the area of the field there was a brand new Jail that had been constructed. It was a temporary wooden building for use while the Air Force waited for supplies to build a more sturdy concrete building.
The construction had only been recently completed and nothing had been moved into the building yet.
Anyway, during his journey to flatten the field for the Lietenants exercise, my Pop accidentally clipped the wall of the Jail and caused it to begin collapsing.
At this point, he knew he was fucked. He was going to be in trouble no matter what he did. So he thought "well fuck it, the Lieutenant told me to flatten the field and every god damn thing on the field"
Pop just ended up bulldozing the entire Jail and flattening it out along with the rest of the field.
He ended up being court-martialed for destroying RAAF property.
He represented himself and only asked that he question the Lieutenant that asked him to do the work on the field.
"Lieutenant, did you ask me to level the field with a bulldozer"
"Yes, but I didn't tell you to level the Jail as well."
"But you did instruct me to use the bulldozer to level the field"
"Yes, I did."
"Lieutenant, did I warn you that I wasn't instructed on the use of the bulldozer"
"YES bu-"
"Lieutenant, did you tell me to level 'every thing on that field"
"YES BU-"
"Lieutenant, is the Jailhouse on the field that you instructed me, someone not trained in the use of a bulldozer to level?"
....
"yes, Corporal, the jailhouse is on that field"
The only trouble my Pop got into with this one was the adjudicator of the case told my Pop to "Listen far more carefully to the orders of a superior officer".
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Knowledgefromwork on 2024-04-12 07:40:51.
I was reminded of this story after the recent passing of a former work colleague Jean. Jean was a keen cyclist in her sixties who used to cycle during her lunch hour.
One lunch hour while cycling down the Main Street of our town a car door opened and Jean struck the door. She fell onto the ground sustaining minor injuries. The driver leaped from the car and started abusing Jean for minor damage to her car door .
Jean tried to apologize but the driver just abused her demanding that the police be called and compensation be paid . A passerby helped Jean up . Jean tried to reason with the woman but she demanded the police be called . The police arrived shortly after and heard the stories from both sides and the witnesses. The driver demanded charges be laid and the police officer agreed charging the driver with a range of offenses . The driver got a hefty fine and license suspended. Jeans brother was a solicitor who sent a letter demanding just what the driver wanted compensation. It wasn’t much maybe a couple of thousand dollars. The driver promptly paid .
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/LaVidaMocha_NZ on 2024-04-12 05:04:31.
Back when I was 16 I was a regular at our Pony Club. For those who don't know, that's a club where you bring your own horse or pony, and get riding lessons from instructors.
Our sole instructor was interesting. If your parents were useful to her then you got a free pass, but if not you bore the rough edge of her tongue and were set up to fail.
You can guess which camp I fell into.
My usual mount was not a jumper, and this day we were concentrating on tricky jump spreads and pacing, so I borrowed a friend's backup horse who was a known spicy ride. The owner was adamant I not "wind him up" as he would lose his mind and go full throttle.
So I'm carefully taking him around the course, dropping to a trot between jump approaches, then gunning him a little just before the jumps. Exactly as his owner wanted, and we were clearing the jumps just fine.
Instructor (we'll call her Dee) tells me I'm going too slowly, and to keep him at a fast canter the whole way. I respond that he will get overly excited if I did that, and we went back and forth a bit.
Finally Dee roars at me that she's the instructor, I'm just the rider, do what I'm told or go home.
"Gun it!" she yells, so I gunned it.
I heard his owner's gasp from across the ring.
Somehow we cleared the first jump, turned, and instead of steadying for the second jump I let him go for it.
He absolutely went for it.
We had no chance with the second jump. We were going too fast for him to judge take off, so we hit the jump (literally), and cartwheeled.
I flew over his head. His front hoof came down on top of my riding helmet, slid down the front, taking off the visor and the very tip of my nose.
Concussion for me, a destroyed helmet, the horse was fine if a little spooked, and Madam's expert opinion took a hit from the horrified parents and students watching.
"I told you he'd lose his mind if we gunned it ..."
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/un_nombre_de_usuario on 2024-04-11 16:17:45.
I work in the engineering department for a government contractor. While I myself am not an engineer, I work closely with them and am very familiar with their love of sarcasm and malicious compliance. This story takes place earlier this morning.
I had to submit something that I'm working on to the electrical engineers for their input on it. Many things in this job are very particular on wording so to make sure that it was going to be processed, I asked the power engineer work leader if the form had to be titled in a particular way. His response was that I could literally write anything in there and it would be accepted.
Crucial background information is that the official ASME abbreviation guidelines for the word "analysis" is "ANAL".
Next thing he knows, he's getting the email from me with the power analysis request saying "HI [NAME] CAN YOU GIVE [OTHER ENGINEER] THIS POWER ANAL FOR ME".
He regretted telling me that I could write anything in the title line but he did Skype me afterwards and said that he almost fell out of his chair laughing at the title.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Lovesilverireallydo on 2024-04-11 12:14:56.
Paint Drying is a 2023 British experimental protest film that was produced, directed and shot by Charlie Shackleton. He created the film in 2016 to protest against film censorship in the United Kingdom and the sometimes-prohibitive cost to independent filmmakers which the British Board of Film Classification's (BBFC) classification requirement imposes. The film consists of 607 minutes (10 hours and 7 minutes) of a static view of white paint drying on a brick wall. Shackleton made the film to force the BBFC to watch all ten hours to give the film an age rating classification. He initially shot 14 hours' worth of footage of paint drying in 4K resolution and opened a Kickstarter campaign to pay the BBFC's per-minute rate for a film as long as possible.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/EasyWinUnited69 on 2024-04-10 11:49:22.
This is a story my dad told me from back in the day. He played at a football club (soccer) and they had a match that day. Everyone was ready on the field until the referee stood up and said “the corner flags are too small”. And this dude actually cancelled the game for it. It’s was actual Sunday league level and just students playing so they were pissed.
Next week the same referee is there to replay the match, however they now checked in the rules book. Apparently there was a minimum corner flag height, but no maximum height limit. So they decided to build 3 meter tall corner flags for the match. Everyone was laughing their asses off. It was even in the newspaper the same week. Fair to say, this time the corner flags were not too small.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/baconflavourednipple on 2024-04-09 17:21:52.
A little over a year ago, I found myself stepping into the role of Senior Project Manager for a long-standing client I had been managing for quite some time. The transition into this new position seemed promising until I began to realize the management style of my new boss, someone with whom I had never interacted during my previous role. It quickly became apparent that he had a penchant for micromanagement.
One instance that stands out vividly is when he questioned me via Slack (we work from home full-time), about why he hadn't been invited to an internal team call. I explained my reasoning, assuring him that I had everything under control and his input wasn't necessary for that particular discussion.
However, his micromanagement tendencies didn't end there. He began requesting updates on my lunch breaks, expecting notifications when I stepped away and returned, despite my Slack status indicating my availability. Furthermore, he insisted on being informed of my daily log-in and log-out times, regardless of his own online status. He even wanted me to outline my daily tasks within my Outlook calendar, hour by hour!
The situation escalated when he expressed discontent over not being included in client communication emails, despite receiving comprehensive updates during our weekly catch-up meetings. Despite my efforts to keep him informed through detailed reports and follow-up emails, he insisted that he be included in every single correspondence, citing transparency as his primary concern. I started to feel that I wasn't trusted and started to doubt my ability within my role. I battled with myself and wondered what I was doing so wrong.
EVERY SINGLE EMAIL YOU SAY?
I began including him in every email, whether it was directly relevant to our projects or not. From routine communications with colleagues to mundane requests for IT support or office supplies, his inbox soon overflowed with 20 to 30 pointless emails daily.
Remarkably, not a single complaint about transparency surfaced thereafter, only complaints about too many emails. It seems inundating him with every conceivable email served as the perfect solution to his insatiable desire for oversight.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Zealousideal_Ad_7045 on 2024-04-09 08:01:11.
This may not be true malicious compliance but good story. Back in mid 90s at age 19 I bought a little used car from a used car dealership. No car they sold was overly expensive. Nothing under 3 years old.
The ca bought had an outstanding recall so the used car dealer was taking it to Ford for me. So after driving it for a week I drop it off to the dealer to take to a Ford shop. Dropped it off and was given a loaner. Get a phone call later that mechanic was in accident and car damaged bad. He was ok. There ultimately a dispute on who was responsible for causing accident. Car was not repairable nor would I want it after repairs. The person who called was asking me about insurance coverage. I straight away said that it’s on them, my insurance company also got involved too as other driver made a claim. The dealer also tried to say my insurance would cover me a loaner vehicle. You had to be 25 to rent from Enterprise I was 19 nor should I put that on my insurance. Nope i said I’m keeping the loaner they provided me originally till it’s worked out. Two weeks later the owner, agreed to replace car and cover damages keeping my insurance out of it.
Maybe the fact I knew and worked for a lawyer friend had something to do with his decision and a nice letter my lawyer friend sent. The owner said come pick any car you want off the lot. Great I’ll take the loaner vehicle it’s was nice and drove great. Owner says Uh well that’s my wife’s fully loaded car she likes to drive , we were figuring something similar to your previous car. My lawyer friend immediately who came with me ensure no nonsense occurred says you just contracted verbally he could have any car on the lot, the loaner is on your lot, dealer tagged and is on your books as a vehicle for sale and given how this issue was handled…(Dealers would get cars in and drive them on dealer tags for personal use. The owners wife was doing that with the loaner they gave me thinking originally I’d only have it for a day). Needless to say the loaner vehicle was signed over to me. Left with a $7500 fully loaded car vs my $4500 destroyed car and a signed agreement they were financially responsible. He did say any car!!!!!
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/MadSpaceYT on 2024-04-08 19:36:01.
So to give a little bit of background, I work as a CT/XR tech at an outpatient clinic. It’s within a building that also as an ER which kinda works as a glorified urgent care center. We are responsible for imaging both outpatient and ER patients. This means we are open 24/7 and coverage for CT and X-ray are needed at all times
I work the day shift and have about 6 years experience. When I first started in this place about a year and a half ago it was great. We had a full staff and everyone worked well together. Little by little people started to moved on to other endeavors and there were not enough hires to keep up with the departures. This was made worse by our outpatient schedule being packed while also being expected to handle dozens of ER patients as well.
There use to be 5 CT techs on rotation and overlapping shifts at any given time. Now we just have 1, me lmao. And the only X-ray techs left don’t do CT scans. As you can imagine it gets very busy and I really only eat small bites of whatever I brought for lunch in between patients. Sometimes I go my 8-10 hour shifts without eating until I get home for dinner. Management is obviously up in arms about this because they don’t want to be audited and reprimanded for their employees not having a proper 30. But at the same time they complain about the schedules being backed up, as if they didn’t set it up to fail to begin with.
I was just told by our district manager that I am required to take a lunch no matter what and make sure it’s recorded on my time sheet. Bet.
I’m currently eating pizza while 4 patients wait for me. Its probably more right now as I sit here. There’s a phone in the break room and they called me asking where I am and I said I’m on break. Obviously management can’t do anything. I’m only doing what you asked ✌️
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/little-blue-ghost on 2024-04-08 19:06:53.
I’m finally leaving my toxic job for a better opportunity. My narcissistic boss treats everyone under her like shit and is generally rude, condescending, and miserable to work for.
We work in a field where we are constantly bombarded by salespeople, many of whom are extremely persistent and borderline rude. I sometimes get over 100 emails a day from such salespeople (not to mention phone calls) but I have specific rules set up in my Outlook so that they mostly go straight to my junk folder. My boss is not so good at Outlook or technology in general, so she does not know how to do this. (She would often scream at me to find emails for her because somehow she could not even figure out how the Search function worked.)
When I resigned, she told me to notify “every representative I am regularly in contact with” that I am leaving and that she is the new point of contact until they find a replacement for me. I’ve spent the last week providing each and every salesperson with her email and direct dial. Good luck getting rid of those!
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/ChaosofaMadHatter on 2024-04-08 14:38:01.
Growing up, my sister and I were good students and got straight As most quarters. As some parents like to do, ours rewarded us for it by taking us out to dinner each report card, and they alternated who would choose the location between the two of us.
Now, when we went out to dinner there were some rules that didn’t make sense as kids. Like if we ordered a cup of soup we had to get a salad or sandwich, and if anyone (including our parents) got an appetizer, then we couldn’t get dessert. There were a couple more nuanced things but those were the big two. But they didn’t apply if the meal came with any of those things.
So every time it was my turn to pick, I would pick Golden Corral. And after quite a few times of suffering through the lackluster food, my mom finally demanded to know why I always wanted to go there.
“Because it’s the only time I can get both a soup and a dessert when we eat.”
We were allowed to order dessert after that.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/WordWizardx on 2024-04-07 07:39:36.
This is an old one from back when I was in 6th grade and school computers were still in labs. There was a guy in my class I’ll call Jason, who was that certain breed of showoff common to the early 90s - the one who totally knows kung fu but just can’t show you right now, and who makes loud fart noises every time the teacher turns around, and is more concerned with belching the alphabet than with learning to spell. Unfortunately, one of my friends was “dating” Jason (as much as a 6th grader can) so he was always hanging around.
We got to the dreaded Five Paragraph Essay assignment and Jason showed up with a crumpled notebook page. He was a terrible typist and always asked me (the nerd of our group) to type his work up for him. I, being twelve and wanting to keep my friend happy, usually did it. For whatever reason, this essay was my last straw, so I typed it exactly as written. Except instead of fixing his spelling as I went, I tried interpreting his terrible handwriting literally - and as wrongly as possible whenever there was ambiguity. It wuz am umreodable mass.
My friend was mad at me, but he never asked again. (He also had been held back two grades by the time we turned 18, and is now a tractor salesman, so I guess he never needed that five paragraph essay anyway.)
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/griffb2481 on 2024-04-06 22:20:24.
Here is a small one. For some backstory, I(17m) mow the yard every week. I get paid 25 dollars to do it, and it generally isn't that big of a deal. My uncle is a douchebag and I hate being near him. He will yell at me for the smallest things, and I get extreme anxiety around him.
Well today my uncle was over, and it is mowing day.i told my family that I wanted to wait until tomorrow to mow, and they said no. My family also wanted the grass cut lower than usual, which I started to do. Then, my uncle came over and started yelling at me for cutting it too low, and raised the cutter. He put it higher than the last time I mowed.
Queue the malicious compliance.
I started to mow the entire yard and weedeat/weedwhack the entire yard. When I came back inside I told my family about what my uncle said. I told them I was too afraid to say no to him because be would yell at me. I also told them that they would either have to deal with increased grass height, or pay me extra to go over it again. They told me to go over it again and they will give me extra, which I did. Thanks to them not listening I got 45$ instead of the usual 25$.
Like I said it was a small story, but I hope you guys enjoyed it.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Maleficent_Froyo7336 on 2024-04-06 22:03:40.
A few years back my brother had married a walking power trip of a woman who had him by the short hairs. Everything was her way or the highway and she could hardly be reasoned with. As an example, she called me up one morning at 5am to tell me my brother had been cheating on her and her proof was junk mails in his inbox. You know the ones, "This one trick with have your 🍆💥!!! All the women will 🥵💦💦" Or "Do you like Russian women? Click here for Svetlana, she's waiting to meet you." And when I sent her a screenshot of my own inbox to show that I had that junk mail too, she blocked me on all social media and my phone number. So THATS the kind of person we're dealing with. Don't get me started on when she uninvited me to their wedding for reposting a humane society PSA on my Facebook 🫠
And this control extended to his 3 young children.
So my 7 year old nephew was at my Mom's house and playing in her rock garden. He had happily filled 2 sandwich bags my mom had given him with his favorite river rocks from the garden and was just pleased as punch. Well. His new stepmom told him he could only have one bag of rocks and that he had to choose. Now for a little context. My brothers kids are not perfect little angels who get anything their little hearts desire. But it's just a bag of rocks. It doesn't do any harm. And Mommy Dearest in training had been a total nightmare all day.
So the bags of rocks. My nephew was 7 and this just breaks his heart. She holds firm and demands that he only take one bag of rocks. So my Mom went to comfort my nephew and tells him she'll help him fit his favorites in one bag. She ushered him inside and produced a quart size bag, dumps both bags of rock into ONE bag.
They both go back outside with ONE bag and Mommy Dearest was incensed. My Mom just smiled her sweet grandma smile and said, "There. One bag of rocks. ☺️" While my nephew delightfully remarked that he can fit even more now, since there is room in his new baggie.
She didn't say a dang word 😂😂😂
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Octohand on 2024-04-06 22:00:25.
First time posting here, had a hard time deciding what subreddit to post this story to. Please let me know if this story is more appropriate somewhere else. Also English isn't my native language, but here goes...
BACKSTORY
I have a 5 years old daughter with my ex wife. We broke up about 2,5 years ago.
We had some ups and downs during our marriage. We never argued or fought per se, but we did negotiate a lot with strong emotions and opinions. Yet, we always managed to find some common ground to stand on together.
That's why it kinda caught me by surprise, when she told me she wanted a divorce. I cried for a couple days, went fishing and then started planning on how to figure things out. Because neither of us had enough income at that point to keep our car and/or house, we agreed that I should take care of selling the car and she would get a realtor to start selling our home. Well, turns out I had to do both.
Anyway, we had more debt than money, and she tried to leave all the debt to me while she would start from a clean slate. I wouldn't let her, and I made sure everything we owned and every bit of debt would be split evenly.
We agreed that our daughter would live with both of us, splitting the time evenly as our daughter had the right to having two parents. We promised each other to act civil. This didn't last long...
We also had agreed that since our salaries were pretty even, neighter of us would pay child support. We also agreed that she would take care of buying most of the clothes etc for our kid, since she would get the child benefit (about 100€/month here in Finland paid by the government to support raising offspring).
After the break up, she started mail ordering new furniture for herself, even before she had found a new apartment for herself (kinda obvious, but she really didn't have the money for it either). Two weeks later, she moved out. A week later, I heard from our kid that she had a new man. I didn't really care, just raised some eyebrows.
She would often call in sick to her work (usually BS reasons) and when her boss gave some feedback, she didn't fix her attitude but instead she just quit. She applied to a school and got in. After about two months, she quit the school too and started demanding me to pay child support. We got a professional to weigh in, and agreed that I still wouldn't pay a dime to her, because she herself had caused her income to collapse. As a goodwill act, I offered to pay for our daughter's insurance.
I thought the matter was settled, but then she got pregnant for her new man a few months after our break up. After our divorce was final (there is a 6 months reconsideration time before the judge calls it), she married her new man. These things empowered her into demanding for money again and again and again.
So now that you know what kind of person we're dealing with...
THE CASE
Last fall she yet again demanded money to support our kid. She was working again, and I knew she used our kid as an excuse because she had expressed envy towards my ability to control my finances to a point that even when I had the same amount money, I could eat in restaurants etc. I told her that IF she needed child support for legitimate reasons, I would of course help, but all the expenses would have to be calculated properly to know the right amount she would need. Instead she demanded I would pay her 200€/month and she would take care of all the expenses regarding our daughter. She didn't have any real reasons for the demand, other than her need for control. She had always been someone who wanted to have the last say in things. On top of her demand, this time she threatened to sue me, if I didn't pay her. I pretty much laughed at it, until I got a message from her lawyer. At that point I messaged my ex telling her from now on I would only discuss this matter via our lawyers and started looking for a lawyer myself.
During the next couple months things started to look really bad for her case. After getting the papers from the court, I noticed her case was based on false data. She (and her lawyer) hadn't asked for my income and expenses before they sued me, and she had estimated my income to be a lot more than it actually was. Also my expenses were estimated to be smaller than actual. At this point I messaged my ex and asked if she's sure she doesn't want to settle. She didn't, so I decided to go with some malicious compliance and didn't try again.
After we both calculated every income and expense of both parties with the help of our lawyers, I (and my lawyer) confirmed that she had enough money to raise our kid. Not only that, it turned out she actually had more money than me for it (monthly income minus living costs, medicine etc etc). I burst out laughing at the absurdity of her case, even more so when she tried to twist things to her favor by sending false evidence to us (and the judge) which we noticed instantly.
A couple days go by, and my lawyer calls me. She had gotten a call from my ex's lawyer, saying he had noticed my ex is lying and the whole case is based on lies, and the lawyer wants to settle. It looked like my MC wouldn't go through, until my lawyer got a message that for some reason, they won't settle after all. Game on!
THE JUDGEMENT
We went to court. The judge was annoyed but composed. He asked my ex's lawyer about their demands. The lawyer started by saying "First I'm going tell a bit of the backstory..." and the judge cut him off, telling him to just state the demands. After a few seconds of silence, the lawyer told the judge "No demands". The judge was both dumbfounded and livid, asking "Then why are were here?", to which my lawyer said something along the lines of "that's what we're asking too". Then the judge asked my ex's lawyer "To be clear, didn't you want to settle?" and the lawyer sheepishly told the judge, that my ex wouldn't agree to settle. They were so embarrased, it was so glorious, like some kind of divine karma being served right at my Karen of an ex.
The judge ordered us to go to a meeting room for 20 minutes and to come back with a settlement agreement. Because she had more money, we negotiated that she would pay for our kid's hobbies, insurance etc to compensate for the difference. The judge verified it, and my party left the courtroom very happy. My ex on the other hand, was balancing between being angry and embarrased.
THE FALLOUT
A couple weeks ago my ex demanded that we would make changes to the schedule on how our kid would swap homes. I declined, saying we have an agreement. She threatened to sue me, to which I just reminded her about the last time she wanted to get what she wants by suing me, asking if she really wants to do it again. She got mad, and I just ignored it.
About a week ago she sent me a message saying that she had a fight with her husband, police were called because she attacked him and she wanted a divorce. The police had to inform child protective services, since there were kids present (mine included). Basically her whole life has gone down the drain: Two kids to different fathers, two divorces before she has even turned 30, a lot of debt and expenses, and looks like our kid will be spending the majority of her time at my place (which is what our kid has wanted for the past 2ish years).
TL;DR: Ex wife wanted money for BS reasons and sued me... If you want to sue me over BS, be prepared for your life to turn into BS. Also, now you have to pay more than half of our kid's expenses.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/perfictspeler on 2024-04-05 19:41:53.
Setup
My near Boomer dad came to stay for a couple of weeks. In the first few days, he wanted some stuff printed off (local map, opening times of attractions, …). I printed his stuff.
I printed his stuff single-sided (with the aging and cantankerous printer, double-sided is an effort, and wastes almost as much paper as it saves).
Trigger
He never misses an opportunity to be bombastic and pompous. I get a lengthy lecture on wasting the world’s resources; squandering my money; being disrespectful to the family values of frugality and care for the environment that he had so lovingly imprinted on me during a long childhood.
In future, he told me, be sure to ALWAYS print double-sided.
Malicious compliance
He’d ordered some stuff online during his stay, and a couple of things need to be returned. Would I print the return label and packing slips? Sure thing, anything for him.
I printed them double-sided.
So one sheet of paper had the label that goes on the outside of the package AND the return authorization slip that goes on the inside.
Fallout
“What the H am I supposed to do with this” he asked?
“Dunno,” I said, “maybe cherish it as an example of our family values in saving the world by ALWAYS printing double-sided?”
After sufficient time teasing him had passed, I showed him the printer has a copy function. But continued to lament the waste in using it to reprint one side.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Kyra_Heiker on 2024-04-05 18:15:02.
I work part-time in a small convenience store, just me and the boss lady. I'm usually there so she can do paperwork in the back and order supplies, so while I'm on the cash register I have to keep everything in front stocked, keep the returned drink bottles and cans neatly organized, etc., it's pretty steadily busy.
Every now and then she just likes to freak out and start complaining about something, yesterday she came out to find me sitting at the cash register. I had just made sure everything was completely restocked, had been regularly running into the back and grabbing things and refilling, etc. But she chose to freak out and accuse me of not doing any work, and since I apparently didn't want to work I should just sit there at the register and she would do everything.
At first I thought she was joking, and I laughed as I got up to do something. But she got really mean and got in my face and said to just sit down and she would do everything. So I did. I started telling her everything that I was about to do and she actually started doing it. I was just sitting at the register and smiling so she looked at me and said "oh it must be nice to just sit at the register not have to do anything", and I said "you bet it is, thank you so much".
She just glared at me as she went back into her office.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/NoticeMeSenpai_U on 2024-04-04 21:00:31.
Let me preface this my saying I’m not sure how malicious this is but it sure was funny.
Years back I used to work on the melt deck at a foundry in the area, it was a union job so everyone had their own roles to do. I was in melting and one of our jobs was to melt the iron for another department to pour into the molds.
Every so often we would trip a breaker on one of the furnaces and had to call an electrician to come up to the melt deck to fix it. The panels for the furnaces opened up and the electricians would just flip a switch and it’d be fixed. The problem was, sometimes it would take 20+ minutes for an electrician to show up and fix it.
Waiting a few minutes wasn’t much of a big deal but when it would over 30 minutes it would start cutting into our pay since we got paid based on tonnage melted, and when we couldn’t melt iron…no money.
Eventually our ATF (Assistant to the Forman) got sick of it and would open the panel and flip the switch himself so we could keep going.
The electricians found out what we were doing and had a melt down (no pun intended), and told us we weren’t allowed to do that and not to touch anything electrical if we weren’t an electrician.
Some words were had and we agreed, only for the electricians to go right back to taking forever responding to our calls. Everyone on the melt deck decided that ANYTHING electrical was out of our pay grade. We then proceeded to call electricians up to the melt deck to plug in and unplug our phone chargers stating “it’s electrical I can’t touch it”. Of course we wouldn’t tell them that over the radio just that we need an electrician on the melt deck for an electrical issue. They didn’t find it as funny as we did and eventually we all agreed to stop calling them for our phones and their response time significantly improved.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Select_Koala1900 on 2024-04-04 11:31:45.
first time poster here so i'm not sure if it's truly M.C.
this was back in '83 or '84. i was about 22 and one of my Christmas presents was defective and had to be sent to the manufacturer for replacement. my Dad thought since it was only about a two hour trip at most and a nice day, we'd drive to the factory store and get a new one. so off we went, me Mom&Dad, i knew the route well as i spent large parts of the last few summers at my buddy's cabin on a lake in northern IL. or going to concerts in southern Wisconsin. so off we went with Mom holding the map...yes a paper map that was near imposible to fold. after twenty minutes i told Dad i new a better way, of coarse being a Dad he was always right "no son, the map says this is the best way" frustrated i waited a few more minutes. "but Dad that maps at least two years old"..."its ok son this is the right way" after about another hour of telling Dad my way was better and him ignoring me i gave up. then i had a thought, you're treating me like a child (the youngest of four) i'm going to act like a child. in my best little kid voice "ARE WE THERE YET?" the look of fear and shock on my parents face's was priceless. the rest of the trip i kept up a steady stream of the little kid car ride questions untill we arived with Dad anounceing "we're here" my responce? "i wanna go home" this was followed by a back hand to the face that came out of noplace just like when i was little. not enough to really hurt of coarse basiclly just a tap. it came as a surprise, just like when i when i was little.
while in the store i talked Dad into letting me drive home . he was shocked when i turned into the nice, semi new four lane road. "damn son, when did they build this?" i just laughed and kept driving "sometimes father isn't right" Dad gave me nasty look and Mom laughed in the back seat
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Due_Math_3995 on 2024-04-04 08:30:56.
I have a patient who is deals with occasional mental confusion. He usually has a personal aide so he's used to getting whatever he wants when he wants it. I pride myself on being able to get along with an even build relationships with the most difficult of patients, but he has proved difficult to me due to the combination of entitlement and his confusion. He had his son visiting him today, and was severely under the impression that his son was taking him home. Any attempt of explanation fell on deaf ears. His son left, but he didn't give up. He insisted I take him to the front door and let him leave despite there being freezing rain and no one to take him anywhere. Eventually after 3 times of him telling me to take him to the door and my futile attempts to redirect, or reassure, he told me if I wouldn't take him to the door, he would write me up for insubordination.
CUE MALICIOUS COMPLIANCE !
I figured why not. At least writing me up would keep him distracted from trying to leave, and it truly seemed like the only way to calm him down. There were at least 5 witnesses to what was happening, so I wasn't worried about facing any discipline. I grabbed the complaint form, a pen, and a clipboard for him, as I did this, the nurse caught on to what I was doing and started just laughing. I brought her the form, and even helped him fill it out, spelling my full name for him and showing my name tag as proof that I was giving my real name. Eventually, I have to move to stand behind him cause I can't hide my laughter. My director of nursing comes over and the nurse explained the situation. I bring the patient over to her and he hands the form in. I just have the biggest shit eating grin as everyone is going purple trying to contain their laughter. My DON was a total bro about it and played along with it while also taking him to play bingo, satisfied that I was being appropriately reprimanded. The DON let me keep the complaint form as long as I completely scratched out his information and I framed it next to my Employee of the Month certificate.
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/GooierSquirrel on 2024-04-04 01:50:12.
Was playing catch with my dad and he kept telling me “you don’t need to move your glove, I will put the ball in it” and he was getting increasingly annoyed with me, in hindsight, he probably meant I was just moving around to much
But none the less, I got tired of him telling me to stop moving my glove, so when he threw the ball to me, I held completely still and let the ball smash into my face, giving me a bloody nose and a nice bruise lol
He immediately asked “why didn’t you try to catch it?” And while I was trying to pull myself together, I said “you told me not to move my glove, you said you would throw the ball right to it” he was absolutely dumbfounded (probably because he was coming to terms, that his kid, might be stupid lol”)
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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Biochickie on 2024-04-04 00:21:05.
Short and sweet - I teach high school science, one of my students was sitting at his desk not doing anything. I walked over and asked him “How can I help you get work done? What do you need?” His response was just the word “silence” So I switched to ASL and signed “how can I help? What do you need?” He just looked at me. I told him - “You asked for silence”