Malicious Compliance

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/thefloorisbennylava on 2024-07-09 11:43:39+00:00.

I work for a major cable internet , tv and home phone provider. The one that is probably the most hated, you know the one. The department I work in is responsible for either saving a customer or turning their services off.

Call came in transferred from our tech support team and by this time the customer was already on the phone for an hour. Tech agent was able to get service back up and running but he was now asking for a large credit for 1 day of service out.

As soon as I got on the phone it was demands "Here's what you're going to do", "if you can't do this then turn my service off immediately, I no longer want to be a customer". I tried to calmly explain to this very rude man that I could not credit him over $200 for one day of service, but would be more than happy to process a credit more appropriate. He declined, and again demanded that his service be turned off "IMMEDIATELY". I reiterate the immediately part to him and he says yep, right now.

Cue malicious compliance; I turn off all his services right there that very second. He starts screaming that he was "watching that" and "what am I going to do without internet". I told him that I was only doing what he asked. This ended with me restoring service and giving him a credit appropriate to his 1 day outage, which we figured out was user error on his end.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/HatHattington on 2024-07-09 10:56:00+00:00.

Ok, so some background. I worked with tech support from a phone brand some years ago and we would sometimes send people free chargers and some other things as goodwill. It was nothing that we were forced to do, we could just do it at our own discretion. We would also log calls and ask customers for contact information and product information to do so.

One day I received a call from a customer who just excreted toxic energy from the get go. He was mad that apparently someone had promised him a couple of free chargers for his trouble but he had yet to receive them so he demanded that I sent them to him. I asked for his phone number and email so that I could look it up but he refused stating that he doesn't want us to save any of his data and demanded that I would delete all the data we had of him in accordance with GDPR. I answered "But sir, I can't look up and see that we've promised you a charger and I can't process any data deletion of data I don't have". He started cussing a bit, calling me unprofessional. He then gave me his name and address which I noted down in a temporary document I created as he didn't want any information in our system. (For some reason he was okay with this and I didn't find anything in our systems with that information. He then demanded that I send him the chargers for free and that I deleted all his information right after the call. I just happily agreed, we hung up and in compliance to what we discussed I deleted all the information from my document. A shame I no longer had his name or address and that I could't send him those chargers. :)

A bit anticlimactic as I never heard from him again, so he likely called different places to demand free stuff. I, however, still smile when I think about this past interaction

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/TwistedTinkers on 2024-07-09 08:39:47+00:00.

I work in retail and recently we have changed the layout within our store. I am on the customer service end taking third party returns within our store. The layout changed many things, one of the things was where my return area was located. The third party returns moved to the old customer service desk and the store returns moved to the front registers.

I was tasked with taking these returns as well as taking care of online purchases that are too big to be up front for the customers themselves to take. Many rumors spread about our phone systems, some employees said the phones were moving up to the registers where customer service is, some said they were staying at the third party desk. I was getting called out for not answering every phone call that came through the system due to long lines at my return area. I asked my manager how to handle it, I do not mind answering calls, however, if I can’t get to them due to a line, I won’t answer them.

Manager told me how to handle the phones and addressed the rumors; the phones would stay at my return area. So fast forward to my next shift, and here’s where Malicious compliance comes into play. Any call I am able to answer, I make an announcement for who it is for on the radio. If nobody in that department answers the call, and the phone system kicks the call back to me, I ignore the call. I did my job, I answered the phones per the manager’s request and redirected the call. If no one else answers, it is not my fault. I did not want the phones where I am due to me not being able to answer 90% of the calls as they were for a different department. Problem solved. :)

Edit: they hired me for these third party returns, Not to answer phone calls all day, if I am getting yelled at for not being available to answer a damn phone, hire more people who can help do that

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/ShoresidePhoenix on 2024-07-09 03:00:36+00:00.

I work in a grocery store deli so I get all kinds of people not understanding the basics about the food they put in their bodies. One particular day though I had a customer come in and ask for roast beef. While there was an open chub (what we call the hunks of meat destined for slicing) it was close to it's sell by date and looked visibly dry. I decided I wanted to go above and beyond for the customer and open up a new chub (I was going to slice up the old chub later for pre sliced meats or for sandwiches). Upon pulling out the new chub, the customer incredulously says "don't you have anything without blood in it?" Ignoring the fact that the reddish liquid you see from meat is myoglobin and not blood (hemoglobin) that juice is where most of your flavor and moisture is going to come from. After a couple of attempts to explain this to the customer I just gave up and went to cut up the old chub for them. I would of course later be told I had received a complaint for giving a customer dry meat. It's a petty compliance and nothing really came of it but I like to think that I made at least one person think briefly about what they were putting in their body, and that maybe us lowly workers might actually know something about the products we sell.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Ancient_Educator_76 on 2024-07-09 00:34:27+00:00.

This one's tough to write; I'll explain later.

So it's the late eighties. I'm living with my monster of a father, slowly realizing this fact as an eleven year old doing his best in Germantown, Mass.

My dad was the neighborhood molester. That's a pretty stupid way to say it, but it's what I am and was dealing with.

All the kids knew it, mostly because there's been stories left and right that I hear from the kids, and I myself have been violated in every orifice. Only months before this did I realize that this wasn't normal or okay. Even when I did, it registered as something that just "sucked but oh well". It really wasn't the type of horrible it is now. It was horrible for me in every way, but it was like I do t know, work.

Sorry that this was the background to build to this , but this is the last apology for it.

My dad tries to get me out of the house sometimes. Let's just say I wasn't his first choice when it came to his violations. I was closer to last. Don't ask me why that actually hurt more than anything else. Anyway he wanted me out so I asked if I could take the laser tag stuff and he said yeah. It took me too long (according to him ) to get all the laser tag stuff and he finally said to me "look Richie I don't fucking care what you do but you better get outta this house quick and ficking get creative!"

He was playing video games with one of my best friends thst he liked playing alone with so I knew what that meant. I took off and hatched the best worst MC they sent me away from him and out to Arizona.

I didn't have all the laser tag stuff to play with others but I still had a shooter. I knew that it changed the channels on people's TVs (the ones who had that new cable ). So I was going to be the creative-est emmeffer he ever seen. I was gonna get him caught by the adults by kissing them all off and running home.

There I was going to any house I could see through the window and the tv was on and started shouting my laser tag gun at the control box. It was as random as it was fun. Some of the tvs changed channels some the volume muted or went up and others just shut off. It was so much fun seeing dads get pissed at their kids especially some of the kids I didn't like (who beat me down because they got mokested from my dad or he tried or they knew about it).

I tapped on the window with the laser gun sometimes , I flipped others off sometimes , one time I just knocked on a door and asked if "my dad could bum a couple cigarettes " like he would usually have me contested the end of the month when we were broke. You know, I got creative.

Before you knew it there was a plethora of Peggies and Pauls plodding down to my house (quadriplex) to give my dad what for. It was exciting to see at first. Then my eleven year old self got a little scared. I was hoping he'd get caught but quickly regretted this tactic. The first guy who knocked was "Sean"s dad. He was the guy I asked about cigarettes. I knew he would be pissed but damn was he pissed. He banged on the door...

"Richie get your dad down here or I'm coming up".

I ran up to midway to the stairs when I had second thoughts.

Then I heard the wet sounds of disgust

Fuck it Let's have third thoughts. I pointed up the stairs I was sitting on the very second Sean's dad barged in.

He looked at me curiously as he Kobe-stomped past me up the stairs. Then I heard it. God I wish I saw the whole thing. All I could see is the look of disgust and surprise mixed across Sean's dads face as he saw my dad being an absolute monster to this poor child, one of my best friends.

A fight ensued. My dad was angry beyond I've ever seen , screaming "you can't be in my house get the heck out of hear we were playing games !!!"

Sean's dad responded "I know what I saw you dirty son of a " then It was kind of a blur. Okay well not a blur I just don't remember.

As I walked up the rest of the stairs Sean's dad walked down with my best friend in his arm as he asked me "you too?" But kind of asked it with his eyes.

I went with them and we all hung out at Sean's house for awhile until I realized my dad didn't know I ever came home. I think Sean's dad expected me to Spend the night, but I left after supper. Sean's dad was talking to him and I could tell it was gonna get personal so I'm glad I made the choice in that moment.

I went home to an already sleeping father who then woke me up hours later to tell me to pack up a trash bag Time to leave for Arizona.

TLDR: I hosted my own version of to catch a predator.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/tahota on 2024-07-08 20:41:42+00:00.

This was quite a few years ago. I worked downtown where there wasn't any long-term parking within two blocks of my building. There were two-hour meters I would use for short stops at the office maybe three or four times a week. Inevitably once a month or so, I would get a ticket because something came up at the office and I couldn't get back to my car in-time. The tickets are only $15, but you only have a week to pay and then they would be $45. At the time, there was no option for online or web payment, so a check had to be mailed in. Most of the time I would get it paid in time, but I hated it when the fee would triple. I basically just considered this the cost of doing business downtown. I was also very frustrated that there was such short timeframe for payment and response on my part, but most interactions from the city took months for the city to respond/resolve (my job involved working with the city regularly). I had previously asked if I could just set up an account and keep a running balance, but they said no.

After about 5 years of this, I decided to set up an auto bill pay with my two vehicle license plates in the memo line and it would send every two weeks to ensure that if I accidentally got two in a month, I was covered. Never again would I have to pay the $45. I guess this caused quite the headache for the parking department. After about four months of automatic bill payments, and them sending me back the checks that did not have any ticket to apply, I got a phone call requesting that I stop as it required a lot of research on their part and a commissioner had to sign for each check they had to send back. I asked again if I could have an ongoing 'account' to avoid the accidental $45 fee, and they said I could not. So I continued sending them automatic payments for about three years after that until I changed jobs.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/durhamruby on 2024-07-08 19:14:50+00:00.

I was reminded of this story by another post today.

There was a house in my town that was vacant and in really bad shape. The planning department considered it a landmark and therefore they wouldn't allow demolition but only interior renovation

So the owner began renovation by removing all interior walls and all upper story windows. Then they mysteriously had some cash flow problems and work stopped.

Eventually we had a bad storm and the entire structure came down. No permits are needed to clean up storm damage. Problem solved. Vacant land is now usable.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/mdlapla on 2024-07-08 14:10:23+00:00.

Picture this, high school, Computer Education class.

Computer Education class consisted, for 3 years, 13 to 15yo, in Sinclair Spectrum computers running LOGO software for programming.

Then school finally upgrades hardware, we get 486 PCs with DOS, Windows 3.1 and color monitors. A whole new world, for kids 16 and 17yo.

Professor is early thirties, very serious about his craft, cool guy once you get to know him.

Aide, former student that thinks he's the bee's knees and everyone should adore him, he's just somebody that likes to microbully people, but harmless because he has no real power, all power comes from Professor.

Class is being thought on a looooong and narrow rectangular room, only windows are to a large patio, no windows to the hall, around 12 to 14 computers, each with it's own desk, 2 kids per computer. The first desk, on one end of the room, near the door, being teacher's computer.

Kids being kids, we bootleg copies of videogames to play on the farthest side computers, since computers are really expensive and you're really lucky if you have one that good at home. Mostly football (soccer) games.

We sometimes get caught, sometimes get sent out of class for the day and given a speech, but that's it since my class is comprised of above-average students.

So, the day-before-last, Professor says "guys, since pretty much all of you have passed, tomorrow, last day of class, we're having a Striker (soccer game, 6-minute games, very fast paced, popular back in the day) tournament. Aide and Myself will compete and all of you will as well. Bring chips, bring something to drink (non-alcoholic, of course) and may the best player win".

The tournament starts, semifinals end up being me against Aide and one friend against Professor.

Before the games, both Aide and Professor approach us very seriously and tell us "may the best player win, but, if you beat us, we might fail you".

Me and my friend laugh. They don't. I'm not about calling his bluff and risk problems.

I choose Trinidad and Tobago (very bad team), Aide chooses Brazil (best team on the game). My friend goes with some mid team I don't remember, Professor chooses Argentina (very good team).

All the other students, already out of the tournament, gather around the remaining two computers to watch the games.

Half time, Aide is beating me 3-0. Professor is beating my friend 4-0.

Aide says with a satisfaction smirk on his face: "come on guys, we're bluffing, do your best to beat us, this is not entertaining anymore".

But he does not know one thing. 4 of us spend around 2-3 hours, 3-4 times a week playing the game, we know every single trick, everything there is to know about the game. They're beating us because we're afraid they might pull rank.

I say to Aide "But you won't fail us, right?" "No, no, do your absolute best".

I look at my friend, he smirks maliciously, I smile, we say "OK" and proceed to comply. BIG TIME.

The games ended 3-11 and 4-12. Aide almost breaks the keyboard. The rest of the students are going nuts. Professor takes it like a champ. My friend beats me in the finals, nobody cares anymore.

To this day I still don't know how nobody came to the room to say something about the noise.

It was a perfect way to end high school.

TLDR: CompScience professor organizes a videogame tournament, tries to pull rank to beat students, gets trashed in return.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/low_myope on 2024-07-08 11:17:46+00:00.

This is not my story, but one from another family member (Steve). I live in the UK and he lives in Canada.

Around 10 years ago, I flew over to see my Canadian family and whilst I was there, was surprised to see that Steve was living in an RV with his wife. When I’d previously visited, he had been living in a 3 story house (basement, ground and first floor). On this occasion, his house appeared to be on stilts. The entire thing had been raised up by around 2.5m, whilst a ground underneath had been excavated leaving nothing more than a big hole in the ground.

I couldn’t not ask why his house was hovering precariously above ground on nothing more than a dozen metal supports.

It emerges that he had sought for planning permission to add an extra floor to his house. Despite literally living miles away from the nearest neighbour, this permission was rejected. He was however informed that should he wish to expand his house, he could install a basement and didn’t require planning permission.

Being the extremely handy and resourceful fella that he is, he had the bright idea to jack the property up and install a new basement below the existing basement. In essence, the old basement now became the ground floor.

I visited 5 years later and the work was completed. I asked him if he’d ever had any issues from the planning department. He told me that they sent someone out, but given that there was nothing in the rules preventing a house being raised by a floor through being jacked up and built under, no action was taken.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Embarrassed_Eye_2832 on 2024-07-06 23:16:58+00:00.

I work in Public Services. It was a new role, and I am the first (and only) one of "me". Essentially, this means that my job scope can be pretty broad and I have a lot of fingers in a lot of different pies. I have also gained the reputation of a no-nonsense problem-solver (cannot for the life of me think why...!) so when people have issues, they tend to come to me.

I was busily hashing out a few tasks last week when I get something else slapped onto my plate. A manager of a service we commission with, appropriately named Karen, has apparently been working her way through people because she isn't getting the resolution she wants. So one of the managers in Finance wants me to "look into this" for Karen.

Now, a thing to note here is that every April we increase rates along with inflation, but she didn't get it. Thing is, it's out of our hands - the services we commission from her are funded between us and another separate Public Service (PS2). We pay half, PS2 pay half. But we haven't paid the increase because PS2 haven't agreed anything yet. What can I say, it's the Public Sector.

Our Teams conversation goes something like:

Me: Hey Finance Manager, I can't actually do anything about this because...

Finance Manager: (cutting me off) This is your job, it's your department that deals with these contracts, so deal with it. I don't care how, just get her off my back.

Now, that's mostly paraphrased...except for that last sentence which he said verbatim "I don't care how, just get her off my back". I write in chat "to confirm, I am to deal with this, and you do not care how?". Finance Manager says "Yes, for Christs sake". I crack my knuckles and get to work, sending her the following email and CCing in Finance Manager and my own manager.

"Dear Karen,

I apologise for the delay in the inflationary increase for [service], however as this is jointly-funded between ourselves and PS2 we are beholden to their financial timeliness. As PS2 have not yet agreed to the 4.1% increase, we are unable to process it. Regardless of how many individuals you contact, this will remain the case until PS2 see fit to approve. In instances such as these, our recourse should be to head down to the offices of PS2 and begin smacking naughty bottoms, but I fear HR would frown upon such action in these enlightened times. Might I suggest contacting PS2 yourself in order to expedite the process? I'm sure Finance Manager (finance.manager@myplaceofwork) would be happy to direct you to the appropriate contact and answer any further questions."

Warmest regards,

MyName."

I then immediately got a Teams call from my manager where for 30 seconds all I could hear was laughing, and he asked me what was going on - I sent him the screenshots of the chat messages between myself and Finance Manager and relayed the Teams call. My manager told me that it was not, in fact, my job (how odd...!) and later that day Finance Manager apologised, but also warned me that "in the future you should probably hold back on the bollock-withering sarcasm, people might not find it amusing".

I think I'm hysterical, personally.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/ApprehensiveToe8187 on 2024-07-06 13:09:50+00:00.

I'm transgender (ftm) and my gf is as well (mtf)

neither of us are straight, but technically in a "straight relationship", which is what my family wanted. and regardless of whether you're supportive of trans people, its still straight. if you view me as a woman, and my gf as a man, then its still straight. if you respect us and view us as who we truly are, then i am a man and she is a woman, and its still straight.

I'm sure my family wasn't picturing me going through with my transition regardless of their opinion, or being in a relationship with another trans person. but i technically gave them what they wanted. i don't understand why they're still mad🤔

this wasn't inteneded to be malicious compliance, just worked out that way. i find it amusing.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/TouristNo865 on 2024-07-06 12:15:38+00:00.

Its going to sound like it's fairly reasonable to start. But trust me it gets silly real quick!

Had just started work at one of the big railway companies as a safety officer/customer service rep. Now as you can imagine that is basically herding sheep and not very effectively. People have places to go but I'd rather they didn't end up dead.

During probation one of the bosses got moved to my station, now this guy could not have fit the police description of up-his-bosses-arse more if he'd tried. Looked like he spent the last 40 years dreaming of having a badge on with significance and by God he was gonna use it.

On the platform of every station there is a yellow line on the floor, few feet from the edge, to signify where not to walk lest the turbulence turns you into a trains doormat. Simple stuff, and when a train is pulling up you're to keep everyone behind it. No issues so far, that's literally my job.

Now for weeks he'd been a stickler for his way but he would mask it as "this came from head office" but on this particular day, whatever bee was in his bonnet came out in full force and he was masking nothing.

Once a train was stopped so long as you don't have a full gaggle at the door we usually have no issues with one or two people (you know, the London crowd who won't wait) being next to the door ready, it's efficient if nothing else.

The train had stopped, three people were waiting for the doors to open, they did, the train left. This guy starts shouting from literally the other platform, in front of other travellers, roasting the crap of me. Safety yes, but this was obscene. So he decided to enact a rule of his own

"If you want to pass this probation i want to see everyone behind that yellow line for a full 30 seconds before you signal to let the doors open. If a single person moves you talk to them about safety and wait again"

"So let me get this straight, that 30 seconds resets for every time someone else doesn't listen and crosses the line"

"Did I stutter?"

Did you fucking what? Oh you're on sweet child!

Across that day, I was honestly looking at my watch more than I was anything else. Remember, it's for your safety after all! Plot twist? Dual line station, one into the city, one on the way to London. No way past it. If a train is delayed, nothing else moves.

Cue about two hours later and sure enough the dweeb ass manager comes charging down the platform

"what the hell are all these delays for?! I've got head office tearing us a new one!"

"Just making sure we adhere to the thirty seconds boss! I've never had so much feedback about safety!"

"Well the feedback I'm getting is we now have a near ten train bottleneck at this station"

"Firstly, it's you have a bottleneck not us, second I'm merely doing exactly as you asked"

His face dropped, clearly understanding what had happened

"Right then well you can talk to the area manager and explain this for yourself because he's going to be here in about fifteen minutes"

"He's coming here? HAH! DEAL!"

Did he go as white as a ghost? Yes. Did he try stopping me seeing the area manager? Yes Was he successful? Hell no!

What ensued was maybe a twenty minute conversation between me and the area manager, me finding out that this manager had been moved more than a few times for "various issues", the meeting between them two lasted probably 90 seconds if that and then a very sheepish looking manager slowly slinked up to me and in the lowest voice ever said "you're doing a good job, I trust you to use your judgement with the onboarding process" and then immediately scuttled away.

He's moved on since, but apparently it was a personal request this time...can't think why.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Stormy8888 on 2024-07-04 19:08:01+00:00.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/LazyAd5441 on 2024-07-04 10:11:25+00:00.

This is a story from my first job as a paperboy at 13. Even at a young age I was always a bit of a nightmare to manage. As soon as there was any show of any unfair treatment I have always made it my mission to know all the regulations and work only within them. If an employer shows no flexibility to me they sure as hell aren’t getting any back from me.

On the the story, it was a great first job. My round started just round the corner from my house and a small loop left my last delivery 3 doors down from my home. There were usually no complaints about time I used to show up just after 7 pack my bags and all the papers were delivered by 7:45 even on the busiest day.

We had a new manager start at the shop and apparently there were some people complaining that there papers were not delivered early enough. We were told we had to be in the shop for 6:30 going forwards. In the UK there are regulations on when a child is allowed to work and given this new change and how it was a deterrent to my life I started to research to see if anything could be done. I found out 2 things.

Firstly minors could not work before 7am and secondly you could not deduct money from wages for mistakes (something that was happening regularly every time there was a customer complaint).

Armed with this information I told the manager what he was proposing and his current way of running the deliveries was illegal and he needed to come up with a better plan. I am not sure he liked being told this by a 13 year old so he fired me immediately.

The newsagents in question was a national chain so I wrote to their head office detailing the situation and what I intended to do next.

I stated that they were not following child labour laws and I would report to the relevant agency. I pointed out it wasn’t a great look that when this was brought to their attention I was fired and nothing changed.

I stated that I intended to raise a legal claim for unfair dismissal based on the nature of my dismissal.

I also gave them notice of my intent to go to the press to see if they felt there was a story to a national brand ignoring child labour laws and dismissing someone who brought that to their attention.

I asked for a response in 30 days or I would start to make the appropriate arrangements. Well it took 2 weeks before I was asked to come into a meeting with my ex branch manager and his boss. I took my dad as a witness but he encouraged me to lead the meeting.

There was some backpedaling. They stated they had made changes. We were now expecting in at 6:45 to do the sorting before going on our deliveries at 7:00. They had given everyone a pay rise and a bonus which would be paid weekly if no mistakes were made. They offered me my job back. I refused. I told them while the pay situation seemed fair they were still asking people to come in before 7am and this was against the law. I stated if they didn’t want me to take this further they needed us to be there at 7am and they could get our bags ready for delivery or we could be there at 7 and be out for delivery at 7:15. The choice was theirs but their interpretation of the law was wrong and I wouldn’t back down on my actions unless changes were made.

They agreed to my points and then as part of my job be re offered there was a confidentiality clause. I stated I was not comfortable with this and if this was to buy my silence from approaching the press there would be a cost attached to it.

In the end I got my job back 20% raise for everyone working the same job and a weekly bonus on top. A strict 7am start time and to top it all £500 to sign the confidentially clause.

Moral of the story make sure whoever you are trying to fuck over isn’t a petty little shit who is willing to put more time and effort into ruining you than he is at school.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/rocksandaces on 2024-07-04 07:46:13+00:00.

I posted it originally on r/TraumatizeThemBack but people said I should post it here so here we go:

I (22F) like to play online shooter games sometimes. Recently me and my sisters started playing Paladins since it has a surprisingly small number of edgy 12 year olds cussing out other people for not being good enough at the game. It still happens though and I ususally respond to those guys with things like "isn't it past your bedtime?" or "who asked?" and just go on with the game and then report them for harassment after the match. But not yesteday.

I was playing with a team of randoms. I was trying to learn how to play a new champion so I knew I would probably suck at first but didn't mind. And just before the game starts, someone on the chat texts: "whoever dies first is gay".

Now, I'm homoromantic asexual, so I identify with the word a lot but I'm also a grown adult who doesn't get sad when some kid in a game starts talking nonsense. So I texted them back: "well, I'm gay anyway"

They texted: "go die then". I was like ok, now it's not cool. And then a devilish plan arised.

I texted "ok" then proceeded to die repeatedly on any occassion, essentially throwing the match. The person was mad and started saying "no but seriously if you die you're gay". I kept dying. Like you did tell me to die, Timmy. Make up your mind.

I know it was petty, especially for the other people on the team but it was a casual short match not a ranked one and I felt real satisfaction proving this person how ridiculous their choice of insults is.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/6cheddar6 on 2024-07-04 01:33:14+00:00.

This was a couple months ago back in May.

I had been living in an apartment with 3 other roommates (so 4 of us total) for about 8 months. We are all women in our 20s. I barely interacted with my other roommates at all, just between our jobs and classes we never saw each other. We all had our own rooms as well.

For some context- on May 5, my fiance and I were planning to move into a new apartment together, so by the evening of the 4th I had just about all of my belongings packed up.. more on that later.

Though I barely interacted with my roommates, I felt like we coexisted well and we never fought or argued about anything, except for some very minor instances with “Vicky” and “Cara”. Those two were friends, and Vicky was definitely the messiest of the 4 of us living there. She would leave her clothes in the dryer for days, pile dishes in the sink for more than a week before cleaning them, and often forget food in the fridge until it would rot.

Maybe 5 times throughout my time living there, I would get a text in our group chat from Cara saying something like “hey op I talked to the others and they said the dishes in the sink aren’t there’s so please clean them”. This was annoying but it happened infrequently enough it wasn’t awful, and I figured Vicky lied to Cara about messes since it was just easier to throw me under the bus rather than own up to it herself.

On the evening of May 4, so the night before I was planning to move out, Cara sent a very long and scathing text to our group chat. She went on and on about how she is tired of “my” messes, hates all “my” stuff strewn about the apartment, and also personally attacked me, calling me disgusting and inconsiderate.

Since I was leaving literally the next day I didn’t see any reason to start a fight so I just said it was her lucky day and I was actually moving out the next morning. She replied “Whatever you say, just take all your stuff and leave”

Now the malicious compliance: as I had mentioned earlier, I had packed MOST of my belongings already, but technically not everything. The 4 of us all moved into the apartment at about the same date, but I moved in a few days earlier than the others. This means I had bought a lot of the communal items myself. I was planning to leave these out of kindness despite them being worth ~$400, however, once I got that text from Cara I decided I would in fact take ALL of my stuff and leave.

These communal items included: -all trash cans in the whole apartment ($100) -the wifi router ($150) -a large metal shelving rack (probably the one that hurt the most) ($150)

The shelving rack was likely the most devastating loss for them since they had TONS of stuff. For reference, the kitchen had 10 cupboards and 8 drawers, of which I used 2 cupboards and 1 drawer to store my items. The cupboards I used were also the ones above the microwave and the fridge since I am the tallest and wanted to be considerate. All the rest of the cupboards, drawers, and the entire metal rack (which had 5 large shelves) were filled to the brim with my roommates stuff. Essentially, there was absolutely no way they’d be able to fit it in the amount of space I left behind without buying another rack or putting it on the counter and floor.

I was careful to keep all their stuff from the rack organised and neat when I removed it, and everything from the rack completely covered the counters, kitchen table, and coffee table in the living room.

I moved out peacefully with ALL my belongings the next day and have been happy in my new apartment with my fiancé. A few days after moving out, Vicky texted in the group chat that “fyi, the wifi isn’t working any more” (I wonder why..) and at that point I left the chat.

I’ve wondered how long it took Cara to realize that it actually was never me that was making messes in the apartment, but I guess I’ll never know.

TLDR: My roommate was very rude to me right before I was planning to move out, so I took all of the communal belongings I had planned to leave behind (trash cans, wifi router, and a storage shelf they heavily relied on)

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Sharkfighter2000 on 2024-07-03 18:18:43+00:00.

So, for the purposes of payment, Spotify considers a song to have been streamed once it plays for at least 30 seconds.

The band Pocket Gods released an album “1000x30.” It consists of 1000 songs that are approximately 30 seconds long. That is, all the songs are at least 30 seconds long. The longest is 36 seconds.

This post might not technically belong here but, it certainly seems to be “maliciously compliant” in spirit.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/MajickmanW on 2024-07-03 01:08:43+00:00.

The other day I found a laundry basket upside down in my room with our little vacuum robot (Terry) underneath it.

I asked my 5 yo "why did you put a basket over Terry! Now his battery is dead and he's all sad!"

Him: "Terry was already sitting still, so I put the basket on him!"

Me: "Well, buddy, you should have let me and mom know Terry was stuck! If you see something, say something."

Queue malicious compliance

Him for the next 3 minutes: "Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing! Oh, Dad, I see a thing!

Pointing at each thing he saw along the way. I laughed for a while and then cried uncle.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Ancient_Educator_76 on 2024-07-03 00:42:35+00:00.

This will be a quick one yall.

I'm a middle aged cashier with hypoglycemia, among other hard-to-spell ailments. Don't get me wrong, I'm no withering waif; we're all got problems. In this day, this problem became a, well, problem.

Prickly nestled in the Phoenix desert lies Your Arizona hometown grocer: Masha's. Since the pandemic , "u-scan" has been all the rage. Literally. Mashas insists that only one live, actual, scanning, thinking cashier is scheduled. That sexy beast is me.

During forty to fifty percent of my shift I'm busy, nonstop scanning and bagging (yes a we have no bananas/baggers) to my hearts dismay. No problem it's a job, cool beans. But when my second front end guy who runs the u-scan leaves to the back for the last half of the shift I'm caught between ringing up plus jumping over to an assortment of angry-eyes waiting for me to scan their "overrides". These overrides happen frequently. Anytime liquor is purchased , cough syrup, etc. it's all me.

Things get busy.

I get thirsty.

I drink water.

I feel a spell coming on even after water so I know I need sugar and fast. So I bust open a Coke and guzzle like it's my job. I must have looked like a commercial for the product. The second I hit that second ounce I hear a nasal "you're funking disgusting! Do you have to do that here? Go do that someplace else???!!!!! " then she sputtered into a curse-laden tirade that I swear involved the word donut someplace. She also called me fat. Not cool broheem. I stopped, explainogized that I desperately need sugar for my blood sugar while simultaneously opting to deliver some good old fashioned MC

"You know what you're right! I shouldn't be drinking soda right here ...let me go someplace else".

So I did.

I walked, sauntered if you will, right to the managers office as I leave behind a parade of customers whose anger now transmogrified into one superbeing, ala mighty morphing power rangers, shifting it toward the curser.

I told my manager"i need to sit down , I haven't had a break in six hours and need to refuel stat. They're out there waitingggggg." Then sat while he went to deal with the leftovers.

I took a seat in the deli area, slowly sipping my soda and watching my manager try to deal with what I've been dealing with my whole life.

(Imagine a diapered version of myself)

The main complainer wound up leaving - grocery-less and even angrier, flipping off noone in particular

Huzzah!!!

I missed a lot in the moment but evidently many of the customers were regulars and stood up for me in the best way; by collectively telling her what she can go save what she can do when she gets there.

TM;DR A customer told me to drink Coke somewhere else. I did.

Sorry for the blatant disjointedness

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Safe-Sorbet8327 on 2024-07-02 20:00:35+00:00.

A few years ago, at my place of employment, they decided to bring in a new safety glasses policy. As I was a member of the safety committee, I was tasked with finding a company who could supply safety glasses that could fit our employees, and with a new criteria: it had to pass a pencil fit test. By this I mean, a regular pencil should not be able to pass around any part of the glass to enter the eye area. A tight fit, as it were. I called around and found a company that was able to come out and provide us with a choice of 120 different models and styles to choose from. This would allow us to fit everyone, from fat to thin faces, tall, slim faces, hawk shaped, big nosed, you name it, we would be able to get them fit. I thought that it was in the bag, piece of cake, or any other platitude you can think of. I almost dislocated my arm patting my self on the back. Well, of course, management has to step in and say, "this doesn't work for us." Their solution? Find a company that has only 6 different styles of glasses and make it work. As I wear prescription lenses, theses new style glasses, were not designed for this. They only have inserts, which are clipped on inside. Well, to make the glasses pencil fit, the glasses fit, the frames are curved to fit your face, hence, the insert is bent to fit the frame. Now just imagine, taking your glasses, and bending them to sit tight to your face. See how this distorts your vision! Now queue malicious compliance. I reported to my boss that I could not wear the new glasses as they distorted my vision and gave me headaches. Their solution was to have me try each model of glasses one at a time, and get lenses made for them to see if I could find one that would work. Knowing that no matter what they did, wearing curved frames would not work, every time I got new lenses made, I made sure that they were high index, UV resistant, tinted, scratch resistant and the best money could buy. I bought lenses for all 6 frame types at a cost of just over $7000. At the end of this, I went to see my eye specialist, and he wrote me a letter stating that I am not able to wear the new style glasses as they would damage my eyes. I took this letter into work and showed it to my boss. They didn't know what to do with me. I showed up for work every day, dressed and ready to work, but they never assigned me any work, as it would be too dangerous, even though I had worn my old safety glasses for the last 25 years, suddenly it's to dangerous. So, they had me just sitting in the lunch room. I would play games on the computer, I was going to night school, so I completed a semester of school, and basically just screwed around. One day, I was playing video games, and our number 2 big boss walked in and saw me, I said good morning, with a big smile and a wave, he didn't. A couple of days later, our number 1 boss walked in while I was reading the newspaper, and he asked me what I was doing, and I said "reading the paper." He said, "why?" I said "they told me it's to dangerous out there for me." The next day I was back at work! 10 1/2 weeks I was off, and suddenly the policy was changed!

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Flashy_Room_321 on 2024-07-02 18:33:46+00:00.

I decided to delete the original post and redo it to hopefully comply with the rules

Link to r/AmITheAsshole for context, consider this the update.

When I initially made my AITA post my girlfriend’s brother faked a mental breakdown to get out of his responsibilities and put the work load on us, all the while he was lying to us and talking shit behind our backs, so I’ll continue from there.

One thing I had forgotten to mention in the original post is that he left behind THREE cats in his apartment that he knew he was about to be evicted from. He had promised us over and over and over again that he was trying his hardest to find a place to rehome two of them and that the third one would come with him IF he moved in. We made it blatantly clear that the cat coming with him would be his responsibility despite being in our apartment since we would be working and we would have very little time to get the cat used to our husky and our own two cats. I’ll make it crystal clear that we did not surprise him with this information and that he agreed to our terms.

Obviously since he was in a mental hospital, everything got thrown into a loop. We agreed that we would assist him with finding the cats a new home and unfortunately, since he would be unable to provide any care for the one cat, he would be rehomed as well. We quickly discovered that he had only been talking to one person about them, despite us telling him repeatedly that he needed to have backup options just in case they no-showed. My girlfriend waited for almost an hour after the agreed upon time to meet in his apartment the day before the eviction for this person and, surprise surprise, they no-showed. With no other option, our only course of action was to call animal control and impound all three cats.

At first, the process of getting the cats out of the apartment was going pretty well. That was until I got a message from my girlfriend and she was super upset, it turns out her brother had told the officers that we told him that we would take care of the cats and that WE would be responsible for any fines and penalties that came from the removal. We would also be at risk of losing OUR pets.

I was pissed. I immediately called them and explained the agreement we had and the officer I talked to was super helpful and understanding, which was appreciated. Later on, my gf got a call from her brother and he was livid. He was screaming at her things like “how could you do this to me?” And “we’re siblings!” My girlfriend aired out all her grievances, all the lies, manipulation, talking behind our backs, his irresponsibility, everything. He was all deny deny deny, and we shut that down pretty quickly. Eventually, he said the magic words: No contact.

I had floated the idea around in my head myself and felt very relieved that I wouldn’t have to be the one to bring it up, needless to say we happy obliged. Not ten minutes later he calls us again and says we need to bring him his car an hour and a half north of us along with all of his things… yeah… no. No contact, no help, that’s how I feel about it.

So now he’s stuck an hour away. He has no car, his family wants nothing to do with him, he has little to no place to live. His only options are to move back in with his abusive ex or be homeless. His cats are in danger of being put down. The only thing I feel bad about is that the cats may be put down due to all of this and it’s not fair to them. They deserved a better owner and if I had the time and space for them I would have taken them in a heartbeat

*again I hope this complies with the fallout rule

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/LazyAd5441 on 2024-07-02 13:20:53+00:00.

About 15 years ago I used to work in the highly regulated area of inbound mortgage sales in the UK. Our call were monitored for compliance and multiple failed calls led to action plans being put in place to get you back on track. Well I had a terrible start to the year and failed 3 calls in a row. The usual follow up and support didn’t happen and I turned things around and passed the next 4 months of calls with no action plan needed.

In month 4 I get called into a meeting to discuss my need for an action plan. I was confused as it had been so long since I had failed a call. I was referred back to the call from the start of the year. I mentioned that I felt that the action plan was unwarranted as I had turned this around myself even without the support and putting me on an action plan now was definitely closing the stable door after the horse had bolted. I was told that this was non negotiable. Ok fair enough.

The action plan is drawn up and there is a section for my comments. I state the dates of my failed calls the record since the last failed calls and my disappointment that the “support” was not offered at the time of need. I was told I wasn’t allowed to record this on the performance plan. What they didn’t realise at the time is how petty I am so I researched the HR handbook printed out the sections stating implicitly I was allowed to put any info I wanted recognising this in this section. I updated the performance plan to state I had been told I couldn’t record my objections the manager who told me that and added the HR handbook section for good measure.

Well it turns out we were due for an inspection and not intervening when there is a record of failed calls was a big issue. My diverting the lack of support back to management would not look good. They would not sign off my plan as it stood and I would not back down either. The result was I was not allowed to do my job. I was already job searching elsewhere but I managed to spend 3 months being paid to job search and be available for ad gov tasks. This mostly ended up with me playing Mario Kart in the break room until busy work could be found elsewhere. When I eventually gave my notice I was immediately put on a months paid leave to get me out as soon as they could.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Candid_Ad5642 on 2024-07-02 13:20:45+00:00.

Background: This happened early 1990's (just after the cold war was silently dropped), in my country we had universal draft for any fit young man.

The setup: I was stationed in a camp "up north". Boredom reigned supreme. The camp had two gates, the main gate to the south, at the end of a dead end street, a few hundred meters from the main road, and a rear gate to the north. The officers mess, and the bachelor officers quarters was just outside that gate. To go from the rear gate to the main gate outside the camp one would have to go out to the main road, move south some hundred meters, and then up that dead end street.

The instructions for guard duty at the gates was really simple: If you personally know the person and know that the person in question is actively serving, if the person can show military ID, or if someone in the first two categories can vouch for them, you can let them in. Else they have to get in touch with the guard commander, usually located in the guard house just outside the main gate. No ID required to leave...

Since the regular mess hall served something borderline edible at the good days, most officers would eat in the officers mess. Since the cold war was "over", most on guard duty would not bother with the required ID checks.

The MC:

Service in the north is boring. Guard duty is also boring.

My troop found that checking ID especially at the rear gate could be a little fun though.

In the morning, quite a few would forget their wallet, with their ID in their rooms, and have to run back to get it. No big deal, going back in and get the wallet was just 5 minutes, but a bit of a hassle when they were already running late. (And the later they were running, the more probable it was they had forgotten their ID.)

The real deal was after lunch, since a lot would leave their ID in the office, and so not have any way to collect it without getting into the camp. so they would have to go around, nearly a kilometer, and then go to the guard captain and get a note so they could enter through the main gate. Easily at least 15 minutes extra on the less than 5 minute stroll back from lunch.

Seems a lot of the officers in our direct chain of command (so we had to know them), or that had their ID ready found this fun as well, since getting a colleague to vouch for them seemed difficult. (The ones declining would be smiling and laughing about it.)

We got a lot of atta-boys for following protocol, even from officers we had denied access.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Ok_Temperature_6962 on 2024-07-02 09:55:03+00:00.

So this happened about a month ago. So I work as an industrial painter (I paint machinery) and typically when ever I get a job they tell me what paint to use and color but on this very day I got an atypical job in which they wanted me to use water based paint (latex) on a carbon steel job. Now I went to my boss and told her this won't work because this paint will make it rust but she said "I don't care just use the paint there going to be here next week" I got her to write down the paint I was to use with her signature and said sure.

If you don't understand putting water on a rustable metal I generally a bad idea as rust ruining not only the paint job but possibly weaking the metal itself. I did my job after a day of prep work I painted it and let it sit for a couple of days to dry and cure and a week after that she came up to me expressing how it looks horrible as the rust was showing through the metal. I said I followed your instructions to the letter and told her again that water and air will make metal rust.

After a little back and forth she concided that she was in the wrong but asked how do we fix it. Best option sand blast it get all the paint off and use an oil based paint (it was enamel) to. She got me the sand I needed and now she trust me when I say it's not going to work it won't work. So that's my story.

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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/LoveMyMraz on 2024-07-01 04:17:53+00:00.

I just remembered this! I’ve always loved the song “Mr. Jones” by Counting Crows, and part of that love comes from how much I enjoy singing along. My husband was on a Counting Crows kick a few months back and the song came on; I gleefully sang the whole thing. He was a bit bothered after and said he liked the song a lot too, and it would be nice if I didn’t sing the whole song every time it was on.

My malicious compliance happened the next time we heard the song, on a drive back home from an event. I kept my word and didn’t sing the whole song, instead singing every “Mr. Jones” mention (and only the “Mr. Jones” mentions) through the whole song.

It was a fun experiment actually, I highly recommend it. He hasn’t complained about me and the song since.