Haribo Sugar-Free Gummy Bears
this post was submitted on 29 Oct 2025
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https://www.boredpanda.com/hilarious-comments-sugarfree-haribo-gummies/
Couldn't find the original review though.
Kiwis and bananas.
Pizza hut. Literally a cure for constipation. That shit is good though.
psyllium husk.
Smoothies. With oats, fruits, greens, chia seeds, yogurt.
Dump out. Flawless. No splash no wipe 10/10
No job is complete until the paperwork is done my friend
I don't know how I feel about the, "no wipe" part...
Of course there’s a confirmation wipe. But that doesn’t flow and would’ve fucked up my meter and Olympics judges table thing I had goin
Yeah, how do you know without at least one confirmation wipe? That's a dangerous game.
Honnestly quinoa for me is the best. Plus it makes funny leopard poop.
Vegetables. Any kind.
Also, here's a counterintuitive tip: if you're going to eat beans, take fiber pills as well. The soluble fiber from the pills lessens the grief from all the insoluble fiber in the beans.
fiber pills as well
Do you mean something like "Bean-o," or could Metamucil (psyllium husk fibres) work? Just about everyone needs more fibre in their diets, after all.
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Colon blowing you-hu-hue in the morning
Big bowl of spinach would loosen things up. If I want instant then dairy products(lactose intolerant).
broccoli
I've always loved broccoli, and a lot of folks hate it, so...
Roast your broccoli, people.
Toss it with a little olive oil, salt it, and bake at 400 or so until it's browning.
It adds a depth of flavor you wouldn't expect if you've never had it.
I love stir frying broccoli with just a bunch of other stuff it's like a flavor sponge, so good
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A big mug of coffee and two cigarettes
If this does not work, try downing a bag of cherries and then repeating the coffee. But do be near a drain.
Just chug a glass of olive oil.
Best all around is to just remember to include fiber in all your meals. Veggies, nuts, seeds, whole grains, that sort of thing. You won't have much trouble going when you're ready to go. In the U.S. that also means not buying much take out / fast food junk, hardly any of those foods have fiber.
If you meant "quickest" then you might be thinking of foods with a laxative effect, a quick drink of black coffee cold brew concentrate works for me. Something I discovered by accident when in a rush to get my day going one morning LOL.
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Coffee
Beer. There’s something about it that seems to lube my intestines and makes everything else come out smoother.
1 cup black coffee, 2 pieces black chocolate, 5 figs.
consume orally before 6 am.
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Chia seeds, coffee, and lots of fibrous veggies.
You guys are keeping track of that???
Not all the time. Only the really good ones I want to remember.
A quart of water, about five to ten minutes before the desired event.
Most everything I eat honestly (vegan btw) but red lentil pasta is a great way to clear yourself out.
Should combine that with brown lentil Bolognese. That's my (also vegan btw) poop-even-better-than-usual food.
Kiwi fruit 🥝 - nature's scrubbing brush. One per day is all you need.
eating the rind of watermelon.
I don't know if we can answer this without consensus on what makes one bowel movement better than another. Personally if I could eject dry little pellets like a rabbit that'd be my ideal.
Dairy has that effect on me. It's not as nice as it sounds. You strain and it comes out with blood.
I was a full grown adult before I learned maybe I'm allergic to dairy protein, after I was poor and went without milk or cheese for two weeks and for the first time in my life I didn't have painful rabbit poo.
Careful what you wish for... rabbits have to eat their own shit once in order to get it to the dry pellet stage.
Interesting, guinea pigs do something similar. They have two kinds of poop and one is still nutritious so they eat it again.
rabbits do it to, they extract more from thier poop, also animals like these usually have a large cecum to assist with the digestion of tough plant material.
that usually means your super constipated at that point, and it puts one susceptible to hemmaroids.
Huel (and sufficient water throughout the day, in addition to the water in the shake).
I can definitely tell when I haven't had it for a few days.
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Lasagne. I think it's all the cheese grease lubricating my insides.
Popcorn, kinda? Enough fiber that it makes it normal and soft; but it also pricks because of all the kernel shells 😬
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