this post was submitted on 24 Apr 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 37 comments
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[–] Grandwolf319@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

Honestly, the world would be far better if he was pope instead of president

[–] Tja@programming.dev 6 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

He would uncover all the kid diddling going on, because he hates competition.

Nobody diddles kids better than me, folks, nobody! Big kids, strong kids, come to me with tears in their eyes, say: sir, you diddled me as a kid, sir!

[–] vane@lemmy.world 1 points 57 minutes ago

Life in America is so bad that their President needed to take second job to survive.

[–] the_trash_man@lemmy.world 7 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

This picture probably already being posted in various facebook groups with zero irony

[–] Bonsoir@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 hour ago

Discordian Trump confirmed. More about disordermaxxing at 12.

[–] hopesdead@startrek.website 5 points 2 hours ago

In practice he would have to be celibate.

[–] standarduser@lemm.ee 14 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

“We’re going to reclaim the holy land, did you know it belonged to us? To me? Yeah they promised it to us and didn’t give it to me. You heard it right? Yeah it’s gonna be a big land just for all of us! I’m gonna reclaim it and then you’ll see the coming of Christ, he’s going to say Don, you did great I had to come here to say it. And I know he will cause I’m the pope of course”

[–] GratefullyGodless@lemmy.world 3 points 2 hours ago

You forgot the bit where he'll claim that christ will have tears in his eyes as he proclaims how great trump is.

[–] Lucky_777@lemmy.world 1 points 3 hours ago

Trump Holy Land #1

[–] ssfckdt@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 hours ago

I thought the Dear Leader didn't have to pope

[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 4 points 3 hours ago

I'd be down with that. Can do less damage that way.

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 4 points 3 hours ago

now we know why he sent the couchfucker to kill him

[–] menemen@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

Would be interesting seeing his evangelical supporters justifying this.

[–] But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world 21 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Fucked up part is he wouldn’t be in the top 10 most immoral popes

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 4 points 4 hours ago

JD would have more claim to being Pope than Drumpf. How many Popes absolutely didn't kill their predecessor? Isn't it like 5 or 7 of them?

[–] Crumbgrabber@lemm.ee 7 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

" In all of history there has never been a better pope than me" " I'm saving Catholicism from a disastrous policies of all the previous popes." " I am the only one that can solve this".

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

He could tariff all the other religions!

[–] EisFrei@lemmy.world 79 points 10 hours ago (2 children)

Pooping?

Picture looks like it's time for a diaper change soon.

[–] Absaroka@lemmy.world 26 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Considering he eats nothing but McDonalds, I'm guessing he's a world champion shitter.

Plus there was that whole "soiling himself in court" incident.

[–] HowAbt2morrow 6 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

I’m gonna come out and defend him here because his excessive consumption of Diet Coke shields him from McDonalds impact on the gut.

[–] Absaroka@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

MAGA can't hold him accountable for anything!

;-)

[–] HowAbt2morrow 6 points 8 hours ago

And neither will the Vatican: The original Epstein “Island”.

[–] cmgvd3lw@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 10 hours ago

No poping certain type of fruit 🍒

[–] LaterRedditor@lemmy.world 24 points 9 hours ago

Through another executive order right?

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 19 points 9 hours ago

Some smoke is white smoke. Some smoke is black smoke. I assume some smoke is good smoke. We’re gonna have the best smoke. Every cardinal says so.

[–] Sivecano@lemmy.dbzer0.com 29 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

"Nobody knows more about manufacturing than me" - oops! wrong dipshit

[–] Ste41th@lemmy.ml 6 points 9 hours ago

No no it’s technically correct, he manufactures lies

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 26 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

So that's why he sent the couchfucker. Now it all makes sense.

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 16 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

The Vatican has more gold than fort Knox. He lovveees gooold.

[–] Quadhammer@lemmy.world 4 points 8 hours ago

And after trading all of the gold in fort knox for meme coins....

[–] sunflowercowboy@feddit.org 5 points 8 hours ago

So can I call dibs on declaring myself the second coming? Got the name.

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 9 hours ago

... Does the Pope golf in the woods?

[–] psx_crab@lemmy.zip 9 points 10 hours ago

It's poping time

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 8 hours ago

He is the popest!

[–] leaky_shower_thought@feddit.nl 3 points 8 hours ago

further proof that he's the one who will save our lands~

may gold be with you~

[–] Wazowski@lemmy.world 3 points 9 hours ago

fake news, where did his tits go?

You're really playing with fire here. Don't be like The Simpsons!