Ask Lemmy

Not going to argue about the general kid stance. Just about the "shitty parent" bit, which is also de main complain.

There are two tiers of good/bad parent. There's the objective one, are the kids being hurt? No, then you are a good parent. Pretty easy.

But there's a more complex one. Are your education as a parent helping to produce an adult with a series of determined characteristics? This is a lot more complex. As there's no universal agree on what a good adult is so there cannot be a good agree on which parenting is good because it produces these type of adults.

I'd would assume that when people say "you are a shitty parent" they would me mostly saying "your education will produce an adult that I do not consider desirable in my idea of a society". That's subjective. Some people prefer some traits and other prefer others.

As in this general example if someone sees a kids making a lot of noise and their parents not correcting them they may say "that's a shitty parent". Do they think they are hurting the kids? No. They'll just probably think that those kids will grow up to be noisy adults and they don't like noisy adults, so they think that's not a desirable education for a kid in their society. Nothing more. I wouldn't take those "you are a shitty parent" in any other way.

depending on context, I could easily support either side of this argument.

on the one hand, people overreact too much.

on the other hand, children are often unpleasant to be around.

On a third hand, people in general are often unpleasant to be around, children are just different kinds of unpleasant.

Setting also matters. Playing and screaming in a park? probably fine. playing and screaming in a library? those kids have bad parents.

Not just kids, a lot of adults are annoying as hell too.
But Kids should be free to learn so for me it feels like they are allowed/have the right to be annoying

I agree, but also I think there’s a line between “kiddo getting excited or having a hard time in a public space” vs. “this kid is being neglected by their parents in favor of phones, and/or not taught general manners and human-to-human respect” because their parents are also inconsiderate of other people.

A child having a meltdown in a grocery store, or bouncing around a park or making excited commentary at a movie theater I can easily forgive. Ignoring and letting a child run off unattended in a restaurant where a server can trip and get hurt is a problem. A kid getting antsy happens, but you also need to let them know why they should be mindful in certain environments.

That said, there needs to be more openly kid-friendly spaces in the US, since they need free space to let off energy and develop their minds freely.

Listen, I just hate kids man. It’s probably my most consistent thing since I was a kid. Fuck kids. We should just be growing adults out of a vat, it’s 2025 for fucks sake.