this post was submitted on 15 Mar 2025
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If we MUST eat a entire bag of Oreos.

Which scenario is better?

  • Eat the entire bag in 30 minutes
  • Eat the bag slowly, and evenly throughout a day?

(page 2) 41 comments
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[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 7 points 18 hours ago (3 children)

In a large bowl, combine 750ml of your closest booze and the Oreos. Use a potato masher to create a smooth yet chunky consistency. Best enjoyed naked while binge watching Bojack Horseman.

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[–] muntedcrocodile@lemm.ee 11 points 21 hours ago (3 children)

U bastard. U just reminded me I have a KitKat to eat. Do I eat the entire thing or spread it over the day?

[–] jet@hackertalks.com 5 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Yes! Both. And Second Kitkat

[–] muntedcrocodile@lemm.ee 5 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

Its one of those large blocks tho

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[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 20 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Smash them up and dump the crumbs into a glass. Now it's a drink and no longer subject to the tyrannical nutritional guidelines of the medical establishment, leaving you free to consume it as you please.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 6 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

Or grind it into fine dust and sprinkle it into your tobacco, stupid!

[–] gac11@lemmy.world 3 points 19 hours ago

I put about 5 (or sometimes 10) into a glass of milk then mash it up with a spoon. Makes a great smoothie. Hell that might be a good breakfast idea

[–] sun_is_ra@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Its better not to eat entire bag of Oreo in one day but if you must then its better to spread it over the day to avoid creating large sugar spike in your body.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

You also won't upset your stomach as much if you spread it out.

[–] null_dot@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 day ago

I don't think this is true unless you're diabetic.

For non-diabetics insulin will store all the glucose just fine. Even if you have an elevated level for several hours I don't think that's particularly problematic to your health. It's problematic to diabetics because their levels are elevated perpetually.

[–] fum@lemmy.world 9 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

This is my eternal struggle, with any type of biscuit.

I try to not eat the whole pack in one day, so eat some then close the pack. But inevitability I go back later and finish the rest!

[–] jet@hackertalks.com 4 points 23 hours ago

The struggle is real! Sugar is its own reward, and its own punishment.

[–] BigMikeInAustin@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No good story has ever started with, "I ate a bag of oreos over the course of a whole day. "

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 6 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure that's how MLK started his speech

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[–] BertramDitore@lemm.ee 17 points 1 day ago

Oh, we must.

If I had to choose between those options, I’d eat them slowly throughout the day.

But in reality, it’s two sittings: one row in the afternoon, and the rest at the unhealthiest of times, around 9pm.

[–] moitoi@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 21 hours ago

All at once so you can repeat it during the entire day.

[–] CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 2 points 18 hours ago (3 children)

The answer is to stagger it, rather than risk a sugar crash. Little and often and whenever you like

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[–] andrewta@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago

Better to not buy dry stale cookies.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

Just commenting to say I love this question and the genuine attempts at answers. I'm going to ask a dietitian next chance I get

[–] NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago

Better to eat it at once. Your system can work away the high blood sugar level and then go back to normal.

If you create high blood sugar again and again, it is stressful for your pancreas all day long. Do that often and you will get overweight, and then diabetes.

Buy smaller bags.

[–] remotelove@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 day ago

Not a nutritional expert or anything, but I'll take some guesses.

Generally, it depends on how you spread out your activities, if you are going to be active. If you aren't going to be active, it doesn't matter when or how you eat them.

Still, high fructose corn syrup needs to be broken down by the liver before it can be used by your body. It doesn't seem that it would get quickly used as an energy source, active or not. Spreading out the load over the day might be better for your liver and give you more opportunities to burn that energy. That is just speculation though.

If you eat a whole bag, then immediately run 10 miles, you are just going to vomit most of it out. Sounds like a win to me! (Doctor recommended. For realsies. /s)

Bruh, if I eat more than a row at a time, my tongue feels weird... like overwhelmed with sweetness. Idk how you even do that.

[–] jet@hackertalks.com 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Doing some research I found Matt Stonie ate 5 bags in 18 minutes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xzd8KLryjJM

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 22 hours ago
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