Ask Lemmy

As an autistic person with ADHD I am going to leave this one alone. 😬

Went to a cousin's wedding, her parents split when she was little so I'd not seen my Uncle Mal for decades. Tbh everyone was expecting him not to show because he's a selfish twat and knows nobody likes him.

Surprise, Mal is here. He had an inexplicably-attractive, younger date (Mal was a disgusting, horrid-breathed, lumpy old man and his date was a pretty, well-spoken woman in her 30s so we all assumed she was an escort, as Mal has no redeeming qualities).

The whole time everyone is desperately avoiding being stuck alone with him, and everyone is talking about having the same conversation... Mal has written a book, he's a writer now, and he's written a poem he wants to read.

He was given many hints, subtle and not-so-subtle that his poem wasn't wanted and he agreed not to read it. Unfortunately whether due to ego or wine, he loudly interrupted someone elses toast to announce he had a poem to read. Our collective hearts sank.

It was worse than we expected, at one point including cringe-inducing references to his daughter having large breasts. It went on and on for at least 5 minutes of everyone silently looking at the floor, sneaking the occasional "No way he just said that?!" glances at each other. He eventually finished, and just stood there awkwardly for about 10 secs, I assume waiting for applause, which obviously was not forthcoming.

Read the fucking room Mal, no-one wants to hear your shitty poem and no-one cares that you're (allegedly) a published writer now. And your breath smells like a fart pushed through an onion.

New hire, brought on board comes to a Monday meeting.

The company Quality of Worklife Balance survey has been returned, and it's awful. It's just after the 2008 crash, and we're barely treading water, but the company held on. The CIO brought everyone into the largest conference room, meant for hundreds (there's a couple dozen of us standing around, the chairs weren't setup) and we stand around her as she procedes to tell us "Why is your QWL so low, you should be talking to your managers about this! I don't wanna see another QWL survey this bad ever!" In a very yelly tone.

One of the managers raised their hand, and asked, "Folks feel like they're not being listened to and that they're not getting enough leeway to make decisions."

CIO: "Well they need to get over that."

And that was the first meeting a bunch of developers and IT folks got to see at that company.

Many other shenanigans occurred there, but my personal favorite was the quarter million dollar genset system all setup and tested multiple times -- fueled and ready to go, failed in a major power outage because someone left the key in the "test" position on the generator.

-- That CIO thought they led people, they did nothing of the sort.

Had a teacher tell some students that it's rude to speak a foreign language in school (an international school)

"Don't you all have phones!?"