this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2024
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chapotraphouse

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Because I literally can't. The second part sounds homophobic, but I don't see how it follows from the first sentence.

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[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 7 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

A Poop Pill Could Change Your Life By Changing Your Gut

I also would like to congratulate all the "str8" and "anal" sex enjoyers. God also wanted everyone to know the backdoor / "tailgate" has always been a legal hole.

[–] merthyr1831@lemmy.ml 20 points 9 hours ago

woaw! (based based based based based based based)

[–] ksynwa@lemmygrad.ml 25 points 10 hours ago (3 children)
[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 10 points 6 hours ago

He wanted to write butt sex, but that's not allowed anymore because of woke.

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 17 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago)

He (it's gotta be a man) doesn't recognize it as a legitimate form of sex (I guess).

[–] Cunigulus@hexbear.net 12 points 9 hours ago

He should have put "sex" in quotes, but screwed up. Oh well.

[–] CrawlMarks@hexbear.net 39 points 11 hours ago (3 children)

Pretty much every culture used animal dung for stuff. We do today. We use it to make food. Fertilizer is made of it. We eat da poo poo

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 16 points 10 hours ago
[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 16 points 10 hours ago (1 children)
[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 9 points 8 hours ago

But it's bird doo doo so it doesn't count! aware

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 26 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Wait till this person finds out what Anglos did with bodies of those same ancient Egyptians.

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 16 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Grind them into powder to make the finest brown pigment?

[–] Jew@hexbear.net 20 points 9 hours ago

However, fresh supplies of mummies diminished

marx-joker

[–] IncensedCedar@hexbear.net 14 points 10 hours ago

A true philosopher

[–] JohnBrownsBawdy@hexbear.net 12 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

The “ANAL” in quotes makes me giggle. Why does that get scare quotes? What is it supposed to mean? I’m just imagining.

Also like to imagine he also flies a KFC sign

[–] Cummunism@hexbear.net 43 points 13 hours ago (2 children)

i like how he cited his source

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 29 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

(N ~ational~)

(G ~eographic~)

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 2 points 4 hours ago

With the huuge......tracts of land pic too!

[–] Melonius@hexbear.net 19 points 13 hours ago
[–] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 42 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

For some of us, eating ass is the only health care we can afford.

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 17 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

It's like one of 3 ethical forms of consumption under capitalism

[–] Frivolous_Beatnik@hexbear.net 9 points 8 hours ago

Stalin ate all the ass with his comically large spoon. So many died in the Holedomor

stalin-comical-spoon freeze-peach

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 30 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Putting the message on a board and not just painting it directly on your truck is cowardice. Commit to the bit.

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 12 points 12 hours ago

[this space for rent]

[–] stigsbandit34z@hexbear.net 14 points 11 hours ago

This is brilliant satire

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 27 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (1 children)

Whoa!

...

...

God is judgeshrug-outta-hecks

[–] plinky@hexbear.net 18 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Dingus_Khan@hexbear.net 3 points 4 hours ago

This is exactly what would get called into Speak Your Piece, just missing a "God bless" at the end

[–] DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml 22 points 12 hours ago

I feel like he might be missing a few millennia of history there. I bet this guy is going to love the Greeks and the Romans!

[–] Yukiko@hexbear.net 22 points 12 hours ago (4 children)

I’d like to know what exactly is implied by the quotation marks around the word “anal” here.

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 11 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Maybe he's implying that people are doing it wrong? That real anal sex haven't been tried?

[–] Bobson_Dugnutt@hexbear.net 10 points 6 hours ago

To say that “anal sex doesn't work” is to overlook the fact that it did. In Eastern Europe, Russia, China, Mongolia, North Korea, and Cuba, anal created a sex life for the mass of people that was far better than the wretched vanilla sex they had endured under feudal lords, military bosses, foreign colonizers, and Western capitalists. The end result was a dramatic improvement in butt sex conditions for hundreds of millions of people on a scale never before or since witnessed in history.

parenti-hands

[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 18 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

I think they want to say that they don't consider anal penetration to be legitimate intercourse but they're too illiterate to know how to correctly do that (e.g. anal "sex")

[–] JohnBrownsBawdy@hexbear.net 8 points 10 hours ago

correctly doo-doo that

Ftfy

[–] RoabeArt@hexbear.net 13 points 11 hours ago

Maybe they're one of those pedantic I-am-very-smart types who think that it should ackshually be called anal-rectal sex,

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 12 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

It's in the butt, but not really in the butt? Yeah, I dunno lmao

[–] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 8 points 8 hours ago

"anal" is when you lay your dick in-between the butt cheeks like a hot dog in a bun

[–] Yukiko@hexbear.net 15 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

I like anal, but only in my hoohoo.

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 4 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

Riding those rails like all up in that choo choo

I'm a locomotive so bring dat boom-bap

Trainnn!

(worst Beastie Boys lyrics ever)

[–] SaniFlush@hexbear.net 13 points 12 hours ago

Can I just write another canon book where God walks back the homophobia?

[–] dannoffs@hexbear.net 16 points 12 hours ago

Return to tradition, eat ass.

[–] wuphysics87@lemmy.ml 14 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 16 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago)

I almost blurred it out as soon as you brought my attention to the sign, because I resent the thought of doing any modicum of brand awareness advertising for a corporation, but it kind of looks like the sign is in the truck bed and that's kind of funny.

[–] LaughingLion@hexbear.net 6 points 10 hours ago
[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 7 points 11 hours ago

Are those supposed to be pyramids?

[–] DengistDonnieDarko@hexbear.net 7 points 11 hours ago

poop, from a butt

[–] goose@hexbear.net 9 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Gotta respect the random Bon Jovi “Whoa!” in there

[–] GladimirLenin@hexbear.net 4 points 11 hours ago

I read it as more more of "wooah the sweetest thing"