this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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I keep seeing posts mentioning this phenomenon more and more often.

For instance:

More and more men are being sucked into parts of the internet that circulate misogynist content, leaving their families to deal with the wreckage

'Andrew Tate phenomena' surges in schools - with boys refusing to talk to female teacher

Like, why? Why now? Why even? I really wish I had a time machine where I could go to the future and ask them what the general reasons were for this social development. But I feel like I'm looking for the specific thorn on a cactus that popped my balloon.

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[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I mean, the problem is that Nick Offerman is too wholesome. Young guys are horny. They need role models who are also horny. But the message that is sent is "it is good to be a man, but only once you are 40 with a pot belly and a wife and kids and no sex drive." Or "it is okay to be a man, but if you want to be horny, you have to be gay". Or "it is okay to be a horny straight man, but only if you are so dumb and mockable as to be harmless."

Show me the man, fictional or not, who is straight, sexual, and not constantly the butt of the joke. Show me an example of where a man wanting to have sex for the sake of having sex - not to get a girlfriend or live happily ever after - is framed as a legitimate goal which should be supported by the people around him, and which is not seen as a farce.

[–] InverseParallax@lemmy.world 0 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Show me an example of where a man wanting to have sex for the sake of having sex - not to get a girlfriend or live happily ever after - is framed as a legitimate goal which should be supported by the people around him, and which is not seen as a farce.

Why?

Why do we have to endorse this as a positive model?

When I was a boy a lot of boys liked to torture animals for fun, I don't understand why we don't endorse that as role model behavior either?!?!

[–] Endymion_Mallorn@kbin.melroy.org 4 points 13 hours ago

The two issues are out of scale.

Causing intentional harm to innocents is psychotic and a fairly clear indicator that there is something deeply wrong with the person doing the harm. Having a consensual sexual encounter with a fellow adult is not (intended to be) harmful. If anything, we should be making it clear to both young men and young women that it is absolutely fine to fool around, if both parties are adults, give consent, and use protections appropriate to their shared goal (kids/no kids, LTR/one-night-stand, etc.). Yes, it's something that should take a little forethought, but it shouldn't be inherently taboo or shameful.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Show me the man, fictional or not, who is straight, sexual, and not constantly the butt of the joke.

That is literally Nick Offerman. Not his character from Parks and Rec, but him personally and especially his stand up act.

Show me an example of where a man wanting to have sex for the sake of having sex - not to get a girlfriend or live happily ever after - is framed as a legitimate goal which should be supported by the people around him, and which is not seen as a farce.

Rock stars.