LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins

i thought maybe I was wrong but nope, called it

I hope he finds poison ivy mysteriously growing in his underwear drawer (then dies)

I mean, ACAB because under liberal bourgeois democracy they exist to protect property rights. Here, however, the cop has abused his position in order to steal property from the bourgeois. Is he still a cop, or simply a man using the image of a cop to do crime? who knows

He probably knew where the regular cameras were since he was working security, this was probably new secret cameras corporate LP put in after it became obvious someone working security was stealing

Why the fuck am I sitting around procrastinating about going to the atm to get weed money like it's the hardest thing in the world to do and not literally across the fucking street

one of my roommates

WHICH ONE, I BET WE CAN GUESS 😡

Pop quiz, hotshot: you've made your first ever cheesecake, it's in a square pan, it seems firm enough and the Graham cracker based crust is visibly separating from the edges of the well greased pan

Do you: cut the cheesecake in the pan and then remove slices

or

Put the pan flush against a cutting board before flipping it over, hopefully dislodging the entire cheesecake, before slicing it on a cutting board

That Hydrator Over There

so do hardware stores lmao America sucks but there's literally water fountains in 90% of stores

Id rather freeze to death in snowpiercer than sweat to death in reality

Hope he gets informed of your success via text

i hope someday you get to live the American dream and murder your boss