This joke has to be at least 30 years old by now.
this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2025
598 points (97.6% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
34127 readers
3789 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
“Also, if you live inside the house, people can touch you anytime they want.”
And you're allergic to chocolate
And despite all of that idiot God's petty spite toward you, you are chief among humanity’s finest companions, and we treasure you dearly.
we will make entire movie franchises about how we will go on murder sprees if someone harms you
Chocolate is literally poison to most lifeforms.
I've never met a dog who wouldn't willingly make this trade.
You wouldn't meet those who wouldn't would you
I'll admit to survivor bias in this case.
Biological evolution also suffers from survivor bias. ;)
My dog is very cat-like in that she enjoys her personal space. She also enjoys your personal space, and will abruptly invade it when she feels like, just don't think that gives you permission to do the same to her lol.
Dogs were created by humans from wolves. Even hypothetical God doesn't get any credit.
No, the universe was created last thursday, wake up
Wouldn't that make tomorrow the first Thursday?
Wow, Last Thursday and Next Thursday are always two weeks apart, except on Thursday weirdly enough.
Time is a flat circle.
But we were made in his image and he imagined that we would turn wolves into pugs. It's Gods will that pugs exist.
But this conversation is done as if they were created from scratch. It lies!
Hypothetical GOD created the earth 5k years ago, in that case dogs only appear to be tamed wolf, but are really created by god. Besides, if we are allowed magic, anything can be true
Cat: laughing silently
Also Cat: Becomes women's best friend
Me looking at my cat, and my cat looking at me after reading this comment:
This insinuates that cats can talk but just choose not to, which totally tracks.
A cat's tongue has barbs.
So does the cat dick
God: and if you eat chocolate it will kill you.