this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2025
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[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 5 hours ago

Job qualifiers in listings imagine a perfect candidate who doesn't exist. Don't let that stop you from applying. They understand that you can learn new skills.

[–] squaresinger@lemmy.world 31 points 1 day ago (2 children)

A friend of mine was applying for a job where they required "at least 5 years knowledge with Angular version X.Y.Z" (can't remember the exact version, but they asked for all three numbers).

He said "I've got 7 years of knowledge with version X-2 to X+2".

The HR person was like "But you don't have 5 years of knowledge with version X.Y.Z, so you don't fit for the job".

The real fun part was that version X.Y.Z had only been out for two years at that time.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 5 hours ago

A person who created a thing (language or similar) pointed out that a job listing wanted more experience than time that the thing had existed.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Bogus job description because no-one was actually needed but the budget must be kept?
And HR/employement person didnt know (or did) better and thus decided lile that?

[–] bier@feddit.nl 7 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

What my company used to do, person A asks for higher hour rate. Manager can't get approval from his manager.

Person A quits, but is told you can always apply for the job again. Request for a new hire is made, people show up, also person A. In the end person A is hired for a better hour rate.

I do know a scrum coach that tried this only to be not hired because person B showed up and they liked him more.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 15 hours ago

I wouldnt try that without a guaranteed fall&back job offer.
Nice try for person A though.

[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Tech recruiters really can be this dumb. I've been on both ends several times.

I remember hiring for a test dev, writing the description for the recruiter, I included all the things I'd like to see. Python, test automation experience, open source contributions etc (this was for a public facing repo).

I get back a question a day later asking if they need Java or not. That felt really out of place so I walked over and had a conversation. Turns out they were filtering out anyone who had more than requested. Python AND Java experience? No thank you.

On the upside once we ironed that out I ended up hiring two people I've been friends with for a decade+. Sometimes the recruiters just need help.

Now the other side of things...I've definitely had recruiters screw up and lose very good candidates, but it was always for stupid shit like they forgot to send the offer letter for a week or they accidentally put them in the "no" pile.

Heh, this one time we got a recruiter ping our team out of the blue saying they had a candidate. No one knew what the hell the position was for. Turns out the recruiters had forgot about a bunch of openings we had closed like a year before, they just never took down the postings. We asked him how he found the job, and the candidate said he manual went through the thousands of open positions until he found one that fit him. He hired him after the first round and he turned out to be awesome.

[–] squaresinger@lemmy.world 8 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Goes to show: in many cases the hireing process is about dumb luck and nothing else. For both sides.

[–] _stranger_@lemmy.world 3 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

So fucking true. I've was in an interview, 2nd round, where the recruiter joined the call mid coding exercise to explain that a different recruiter had just given the position to someone else without waiting for feedback on anyone else and therefore they had to stop all in process interviews. She was pissed and apologized. The guy giving the interview just gave me this look like "they do this shit all the time" and ended the call.

[–] squaresinger@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

In a company I used to worked in, they hired a new guy for our team. Contract was signed, he resigned from his last position. New budget comes in a week before he was supposed to start, and his position was cut.

He was basically let go before he started working for us.

[–] Shayeta@feddit.org 73 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"We must first implement base functionality, then we will add all the auxiliary components."

x months pass

"Alright, base functionality has been implemented and it works. Good job team, lets ship it!"

[–] Kichae@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] Shayeta@feddit.org 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The project itself is very boring. This is why I sprinkle in fun stuff on top of the project that devs will get to do once the boring part is done.

But oh no! We had just enough time to finish the "boring part" and no time for "the rest of the project", darn it! :(

[–] 0x0@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago

I to sprinkle sarcasm and get fired. It's my soft skill.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

You do now!

[–] 0x0@lemmy.zip 18 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I'd really prefer to maintain the crap Jenkins server we were using, but noooo some dipshit higher up got his cock sucked by some M$ exec so it's github actions now 'cos the cloud will save the world.

[–] hector@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 hours ago

I'm not very experienced but I really love GitHub actions :). However it's probably not a portable skill, but anyway I know Docker so I can just use that if I need automated builds outside of GitHub

[–] genfood@feddit.org 6 points 1 day ago

I would love to use GH Actions instead tbh or woodpecker

[–] Olap@lemmy.world 31 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Learn bash. Learn jenkins. You'll thank me later

[–] Karjalan@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Omg... I think I'm showing my age 😅 I thought that was "ask jeeves" (pre google Internet search thing) and it was a joke about developers looking things up so the time on the job

[–] mmddmm@lemm.ee 3 points 1 day ago

In a great place, the python symbol would be on both sides too. All the other ones are best just left.

[–] four@lemmy.zip 36 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] PodPerson@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 day ago

“Just jenkin it.”

  • Cyril Figgis
[–] underscores@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

and by "it" I mean ... well ... my pipeline

[–] magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 35 points 1 day ago (2 children)

There’s also ”we do machine learning”, which usually translates to ”someone trained an SVM model 10 years ago”.

[–] mormund@feddit.org 5 points 1 day ago

Frankly, the only respectable way to do it!

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

It's a useless fiction for hiring, but highly effective for getting money from the dumber investors.

[–] ziggurat@lemmy.world 15 points 1 day ago

This exact thing just happened to me. It wasn't just me, it was the whole team.

I'll see how it goes

[–] RustyNova@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] jarvis@lemmy.world 55 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The promise of Jenkins and all the much more modern CI/CD tools when the job is ultimately just maintaining an aging Jenkins server.

[–] Kowowow@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ah I thought was a thing about ask jeaves

[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 2 points 22 hours ago

Same. Got excited a bit.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I know why they do this. The last guy's core job was Ask Jeeves, but he was involved in and at least touched all those other technologies. HR looks at last guy's resume, figures those are the skills needed, posts a mess.

SOURCE: Been the last guy, seen my replacement posting.

[–] Gladaed@feddit.org 5 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It's called Jenkins/Hudson

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I'm guessing that was bait, lol.

Edit: Wait, was the logo similar? It was before my time.

[–] Gladaed@feddit.org 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Our Jenkins is hosted at the DNS Hudson. I thought you typed Jeeves instead of Jenkins via auto correct but I guess I just didn't get it.

[–] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 1 day ago

Not OP, but good to know.

[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Hudson, now there is a name I haven't heard in a very long time.

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Not knowing yourself; it's a lot like dating in that there's big dreams and ideas but the reality of what is needed on the daily often doesn't mesh. I find it helps to talk to other employees and ask about their job and roles to get an envelope of what the company actually needs vs. what they say they need.

Can't really so that with dating though!

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Finding a job is like dating except if you are too picky you starve to death.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Feedback when you don't get the job: "They need someone who can be up to speed right away, and they thought your Grafana might be a little light."

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] bigboismith@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ah, I remember ops people talking about "Jankins"

This describes how most people have it deployed, yes.

It gets real fun when you have custom Java plugins, Groovy script, BASH script, Windows runners, and Linux runners, all in play at the same time. Much of which is held together with hopes, dreams, and unicorn farts, willed into existence by wizards that haven't worked there in over seven years. If upper management could even comprehend the level of deferred maintenance and haphazard software hackery that birthed this electronic Gordian knot, this unholy union of decrepit software and company policy, they wouldn't sleep. Ever.