this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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chapotraphouse

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Reminder that Luigi Mangione, the handsome young man most unfairly accused of murder, is a Catholic. He is also white, Italian and vaguely paternalistic. Finally, he has been compared to Jesus and various saints, and is seen as a champion of the sick and the downtrodden.

All I'm saying is, the College of Cardinals has a chance to do something very funny.

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[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 50 points 4 days ago (1 children)

someone should make a hotline miami clone where luigi storms through vatican city and murders all the pedos and the people who protected them

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 47 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] FunkyStuff@hexbear.net 43 points 4 days ago (1 children)

INT. PAPAL APARTMENTS NIGHT

The Dean of the Conclave herds a group of curious Cardinals as they rush to the entrance, crowding around the young man. He carries a letter as he sleeps, clearly exhausted from the travels

The dean grabs and reads the letter.

Dean: Gentlemen, sit down. It appears we have another cardinal. The Pope had named Cardinal Mangione in secret in a —perfectly legitimate— seldom used procedure.

[–] chirospasm@lemmy.ml 13 points 4 days ago

This comment it golden

[–] miz@hexbear.net 39 points 4 days ago
[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 34 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

If the Roman Catholic Church had any survival instinct left they would do it

[–] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 21 points 4 days ago (2 children)

The Pope can’t be hot. It’s like a law or something

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 19 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Also must be minimum 83 years old

[–] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 10 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Make work program for Catholic Octogenarians

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Biden turning down the second term so he could run for Pope.

[–] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago

by god is that Hillary's music?

[–] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 7 points 4 days ago

The Catholic church could try to fix their membership crisis by having a hot young pope.

[–] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago

If he becomes Pope, doesn't that technically mean he has diplomatic immunity due to being head of state? How does that work if someone was accused of a crime outside of their country prior to becoming head of state?

[–] CommunistCuddlefish@hexbear.net 15 points 4 days ago (3 children)

He is also white, Italian

Well is he white, or is he Italian?

[–] theturtlemoves@hexbear.net 32 points 4 days ago (1 children)

We're playing with Meditteranean racism rules, not US ones.

[–] CommunistCuddlefish@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago

This is the best answer I have ever seen to that question. Congratulations!

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Whiteness is not a fixed concept, it's relational. Irish, Slavs, and Mediterraneans can be white or not depending on who they're being compared to.

[–] CommunistCuddlefish@hexbear.net 7 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I know... but I also really like telling white people that they aren't white and need to have solidarity with the rest of us instead of thinking of themselves as separate. Whiteness is not a fixed concept and I want to break it.

[–] miz@hexbear.net 5 points 4 days ago
[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 12 points 4 days ago

whywhywhywhywhy it's his turn

[–] Sickos@hexbear.net 10 points 4 days ago

luigi-dance let me be an instrument of thy wrath jesus-cleanse

[–] Beaver@hexbear.net 7 points 4 days ago (4 children)

What would be his pontificial name?

[–] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 15 points 4 days ago

There is a Saint Luigi Scrosoppi of Udine, who is the Patron Saint of people with HIV/AIDS, people who would also get screwed over by the healthcare system.

So Pope Luigi definitely could work.

[–] GoodGuyWithACat@hexbear.net 11 points 4 days ago

Pope Innocent of doing anything bad

[–] Guamer@hexbear.net 6 points 4 days ago

Pope Weegee

pope biggus dickus