this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2025
472 points (95.0% liked)
memes
16263 readers
3134 users here now
Community rules
1. Be civil
No trolling, bigotry or other insulting / annoying behaviour
2. No politics
This is non-politics community. For political memes please go to !politicalmemes@lemmy.world
3. No recent reposts
Check for reposts when posting a meme, you can only repost after 1 month
4. No bots
No bots without the express approval of the mods or the admins
5. No Spam/Ads
No advertisements or spam. This is an instance rule and the only way to live.
A collection of some classic Lemmy memes for your enjoyment
Sister communities
- !tenforward@lemmy.world : Star Trek memes, chat and shitposts
- !lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world : Lemmy Shitposts, anything and everything goes.
- !linuxmemes@lemmy.world : Linux themed memes
- !comicstrips@lemmy.world : for those who love comic stories.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I purchased a relatively cheap bidet recently and it is the single best life upgrade I have ever made . It paid for itself in the first 2 months of not having to buy toilet paper (or at least not nearly as much). It is amazing, I highly recommend.
You got that bum gun bro?
All hail the bum gun
The waffle rifle
Preach the bidet gospel, brother.
So many dudes can't get over the butt stuff, it's hilarious.
2 months! I should try this out... if i was still single, a 12 pack would last me like 3 months if not more. Having a wife? A 36 pack lasts like 1 month... its literally a roll a day. It drives me nuts because I honestly can't understand how half of that isn't just waste (if not more).
Yeah women in my house use over a roll per day too and I have no idea how because a roll lasts me over a month
I'm half convinced my daughter eats the stuff.
It's a good strategy. When it exits it auto cleans.
You'll save loads of money over time. My wife and I used to go through at least half a cube of toilet paper each month. I installed a bidet and our TP consumption was easily quartered.
Two things I don’t get about bidets: How do you know you’re clean, and how do you dry off without leaving toilet paper lint everywhere?
Precisely my question to those who don't use them
You know you're clean when there's no poo on the paper.
If my arm was constantly covered by two layers of fabric this comic might have a point.
Also, just using a bidet is like washing your car just by hosing it off. Sometimes you need a good scrub.
Also, the appropriate thing to do would be to use soap and water.
I don't think anyone "just" uses a bidet. I follow up with a couple wipes, it's just more a finishing move than the whole strategy.
Which brings me back to the problem of TP lint on a wet ass
Never had a problem. Lint on a dry ass was always way worse.
Our experiences are diametrically opposed
Maybe you're pressing too hard?
Without water I can press a lot harder.
Once the toilet paper gets wet it shreds like, well, wet toilet paper
You don't need to press that hard at all. It's more a light scrape than anything. It's never been an issue for me.
I don’t press hard. If my ass is wet the TP shreds.
Maybe I’m using inferior paper products.
You can check whether you're clean with a toilet paper, if you're unsure. But I did so a few times at the beginning and never had stained toilet paper (so long as I didn't stick it inside, I guess), so I don't bother anymore.
In particular, you also feel cleaner when you regularly use a bidet (like you're freshly showered), so that also makes it easier to feel when you aren't clean...
It's an assisting tool, not the primary cleaning method. Blasts off bulk material and loosens up whatever's left, but you still need TP to finish the job. A lot less, but you still need some.
As for lint, that happens regardless of the use of a bidet. Nothing changes there.
Disagree about the assisting tool. Yes, you can still find shit, if you stick your finger up your bum hole, but you don't need to powerwash your intestines to be clean. They'll be full of shit soon after anyways. So long as the outside of the door is squeaky clean, that's as clean as you'll get.
What sort of horrendously overpowered bidet do you have that can push through the sphincter like that?! And more importantly...
Where can I buy one?
Quite a few of the cheaper ones that just have a solid stream can be that powerful, at the right angle. Of course it depends greatly on your house's water pressure, too.
... and yea as Ephera mentioned, you might have to relax a bit. It's easy to resist but that much water pressure against the sensitive flesh is uncomfortable to say the least.
I use a hand-operated travel bidet, so it's exactly as overpowered as my handshake is firm. 🙃
More seriously, I did say not everything past the sphincter will get cleared out. But yeah, I believe it is generally possible for humans to relax their sphincter, so if you angle the beam right, that should do the trick...
Why would you have the gun and not want to wash the deep parts and reach the intestines?
What if I want to powerwash my intestines?
Seconded.
I don’t have a problem with lint unless I have to shit while my ass is wet.
I’ve had to shit again after having just used the bidet (still sitting down), and given how clean I feel after having washed, I don’t notice the wetness at all, because I’m going to wash again.
That said, I hate the feeling of being barefoot on bare floor, so it’s not as though I don’t understand.
You dab, you don’t rub. And you get clean the same way you clean your back or head, you’re not looking in a mirror for those right?
My back and head usually don’t have poo on them. If I had something grimy like that on my head or back I’d want to have a wipe or a mirror to make sure there’s none left.
point is that you don't have to see your head to know it's clean, you can feel it when you're washing. Are you looking at your butthole after you wipe? Are you wiping down your cheeks and ballsack and schlong too? You don't need to be able to see what you are cleaning to get it clean. And afterwards you still get a check with the toilet paper.
You know you’re clean the same way you know you’re clean in the shower. And just like the shower, some use a bit of soap when using the bidet.
Sometimes when I have a particularly heinous dookie I’ll get in the shower afterwards, and I make sure I’m clean by actually wiping my hand across it to see if there’s still poo.
You can do the same thing with a bidet and completely obviate the need to get in the shower.
As I understand, those who clean with soap on the bidet are already washing the hand that washes out the ass-crack, the same way as if you’re in the shower, and now to know your ass is shower level clean.