this post was submitted on 03 Apr 2025
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[–] Salvia@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago (5 children)

Also does anyone find it odd how often society calls grown women girls while they stick to men when referring to men without a second thought? I still do it when I'm not paying attention.

[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 10 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Fun use of "boys" has been really popular for quite some time. Me and the boys. Boys will be boys.

[–] WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hell, a business or industry run primarily by men in their fifties and older can be referred to as "a boys club."

[–] Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago

I hear almost daily how the older secretary and HR women call the workers "boys", I think it's quite endearing but tbh it doesn't have the same history of belittling really.

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 3 points 2 days ago

'Guys' even tho the singular is used to mean a man, is really an a-gendered plural

[–] Salvia@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Those are specific phrases but yeah I getcha. And you could argue, like some other replies said, sometimes "boys" is used in casual ways, "girls" is used as an equivalent to "guys", it can mean "gals" too. Fair points but I do believe people have some kind of aversion to "woman/women" and won't ever use if in a fun context. it's just an uptight sounding word for some reason.

[–] abfarid@startrek.website 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Stereotypically, women always strive to look as young as possible, so calling one a girl can be seen as a compliment. While men, stereotypically strive to appear mature, hence calling one a boy can be considered an insult.

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I don’t disagree with you that society does think that way, but I disagree with the sentiment so much.

I’m 33 and afab. I accepted being called a “girl” until I was about 23 (probably not a coincidence that that was the age at which I graduated college), but it started chafing at like 16, even though I didn’t have a good alternative at the time (because I agree that “female” as a noun feels gross). If someone called me a girl now I would correct them without hesitation in basically every scenario outside of a eulogy or wedding speech.

I really wish there was a better option. I don’t really like “woman,” but it’s better than gal, lady, dudette, chick, or girl imo. I’m perfectly fine with guy or dude, especially in plural, but I’m probably an egg, so that colors my perspective for the singular use a little.

[–] abfarid@startrek.website 4 points 2 days ago

I honestly don't see this changing any time soon because there are biological incentives behind both stereotypes. And, anecdotally, my gf (40+) will pout if in some context I refer to her as a woman, and be like "noooo, I'm a girl... :(". Semi-jokingly, of course, but only semi.

[–] Salvia@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Same as the other reply, I don't disagree. Do I think there's mal intent? Nah. But I'm sure this has an unconscious effect on how we perceive women. Besides lots of women look young without even trying, I think with the improvement of medicine and public health, people in general are just looking younger nowadays so we should nip this habit in the butt.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 7 points 2 days ago

I just view it as a quirk of the language. "Guys and girls" or "guys and gals" are paired words. Guy is a casual way to refer to men, so I think people use girl as a casual way to refer to women because it's sort of the pair to guy. Lady feels too formal.

[–] mienshao@lemm.ee 6 points 2 days ago

As a man, this has legit always bugged me. We use “girls” in contexts that we would NEVER use “boys” in, even when they’re the same age.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 days ago

I have to keep reminding myself of this. I'm in my late 20s and I still slip up when referring to myself sometimes.