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I've been in like, 3 or 4 of them so far. I can really see the value in a poly relationship but I find it, that it's incredibly challenging to maintain much less establish one. All of the ones I've been in, was where the individual wanting or orchestrating the poly relationship, was just a flat out cheater who wanted more than they can handle. My limit is no more than 2 other partners. The people I kept finding myself with, practically wanted like several partners too many and it just complicated things.
I'm open to being in a good one but I really don't know nor would I know anything or anyone that'd want a good stable poly relationship.
It sounds like the person you were with would have been better off in an open relationship with someone.rather than labelling it as polyamory or want to pursue polyamory?
I've not been in a ployamerous relationship myself but I'd imagine the hardest part is the time and effort needed to maintain your relationship with each partner?
I could see 2 partners being doable but hard work, but once you go beyond that, then it must get very difficult? Especially if you don't all live together as juggling full time work around making the time and space to maintain very close personal relationships must be very hard.
And my mind boggles when you get to pplyamorpus "networks" where 2 partners may have relationships with other people rather than a shared 3rd partner. I think it would take a lot of honesty and maturity to make that work long term. I don't think I'd be capable of that.