I’m a cis guy who likes to dress feminine around the house, and figured I’d paint my nails sparkly red and green for Christmas. Went into (my very masculine place of) work with them and got a depressing amount of comments asking if I’m gay, or expressing concern that I might be.

My dudes, it’s painted nails. I’m not trying to rail you all. Not least because my standards are far higher.

[–] Hexarei@programming.dev 8 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Doing those kinds of things at home because they were fun actually led to me realizing I'm genderfluid recently. It's been crazy facing a part of my experience of life that the patriarchal society we live in essentially deprived me of up to this point: knowing how euphoric it feels to let myself want to be pretty and feminine sometimes.

[–] DJDarren@thelemmy.club 4 points 10 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago) (1 children)

Amen to that, broster.

I’m lucky that my wife is enby and a similar size, so was happy for me to try on some of their clothes. Long story short, Vinted has enabled me to build up a small wardrobe of dresses, skirts, and pretty tops that I wear most evenings. It feels nice to feel pretty.

I’m basically Captain Shakespeare.

(Robert De Niro in Stardust, dancing in his dressing room wearing lingerie and a feather boa.)

[–] Hexarei@programming.dev 2 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

So far I've only got socks, skirts, and hair accessories (hair down to my waist). Definitely been wanting to explore other clothing now that I know myself better.

It sounds like you're having a blast, and it's always fun to hear about how other folks have experimented. Vinted looks neat, If you've got any other tips let me know lol

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 85 points 1 day ago (1 children)

And this is also why its called homoPHOBIA. Often these people are literally afraid of gay(or any other queer) people. Nothings scarier than the unknown and especially if all your life theyve told you what horrible acts they perform.

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)

And you secretly are a little curious about it.

[–] shani66@ani.social 11 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Heterosexuality as we know it today isn't really real, so it makes sense. Having sex with other men (topping specifically) was just something that men did before the rise of a certain evil religion. I'm not really a scholar, but it seems to fit to me. If heterosexuality doesn't actually exist and your religion says anything else is evil, you have to demonize sexuality heavily, and That's exactly what happened.

[–] sudneo@lemm.ee 8 points 1 day ago

If you are referring to ancient Greece/Rome as a culture where homosexuality (specifically sex between men) was normalized, that's wrong. What actually was normal was men having sex with male kids, not adults (see https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_ancient_Greece). This is clearly something we now consider a complete abomination, obviously, but men did not use to have sex with other adult men (surely there were cases, but it was not a widespread cultural phenomenon like pederasty).

This is also why I don't think it makes sense to use historical references to help build a moral foundation about what's right and what's wrong. Gay sex is fine because it's consensual adults enjoying and not harming anybody, not because there was some golden age in which this was accepted.

[–] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

First sentence, ok I'm with you.

Having sex with other men (topping specifically) was just something that men did

And the bottoms were not men then? I understand what you're referring to, you just need to think more critically about it.

I'm not really a scholar, but it seems to fit to me.

Sounds pretty gay book bro

[–] shani66@ani.social 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Maybe i should have specified 'straight' men (as in the culturally assumed 'default'), but all I've heard about ancient sexuality has been through an incredibly homophobic culture, so you might have a pretty good point there.

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Of course everyones curious and this doesnt mean that everyones queer it just means that its human nature to question things. You may be curious for a while and then find out whether youre queer or not. Nothings better than knowing who you are. These people are extremely lost and thats why you see so many of them actually be gay n stuff but they hide it and hurt people who are the same as them. Of course this is mainly about politicians that are gay but it applies to a lot more fields of life.

[–] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Right on. I peeked at other boys penises when I was very young, got called out one time I remember pretty well. Went on to be straight. Went to college and kissed a guy and made out with a guy. It didn't work for me. I now understand I am very straight, but I'm not a fucking homophobe. I'll tell you when you look good as a man.

One more point- I started to, and couldn't go through with, man man woman threesome when I was young. I just don't find men sexually interesting and everyone enjoying each other is what makes that fun.

[–] laserm@lemmy.world 23 points 1 day ago

"bUt NoRmAlCy.." Fuck this stupid, perverse idea of normalcy. People should be free to express themselves (as long as theyre not harming anyone ofc), no matter their gender. The freedom of expression is fundamentally programmed into the human nature and must be respected in a free society.

[–] spujb@lemmy.cafe 25 points 1 day ago

hell yeah brother 💅

[–] Wrufieotnak@feddit.org 22 points 1 day ago

That last paragraph sounds exactly like the words that need to be uttered to them.