this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2023
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Boyfriend of 2 years (best friend of 6) just told me he’s started seeing someone else. No discussion. Just ghosted me for a week and hit me with this news. Thought he was my soulmate, lmao. I feel like someone just ripped out my insides. Just turned 31 this year, this shit is not any easier than when I was a teenager.

How did you make it through that first night? The second? The third? Is it really just time? I feel like my body is too old to survive another heartbreak.

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[–] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My self-confidence is totally crushed at the moment, it's honestly hard to do anything.

[–] JustZ@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's when you most need to do it.

Here's a link for you. Just listen to it with headphones and try to say the phrases out loud along with her (or repeating after her if there are pauses between them). Nice female voice for you even.

You do not have to believe these phrases as you say them. It's like when someone says "don't think about a horse," and because humans are so silly, we immediately think of a horse.

You say these things and the phrases are stated in such a way that they trick your subconscious into believing. People say it even works if you play these through headphones as you sleep, because your subconscious brain still hears a lot of it. Your brain is already affecting you with things that are not true, "I'm a total loser" "I'll never have any friends" "I should not have moved to this city." Whatever.

Doing things feels hard because you're avoiding the emotions that come from negative thoughts about the thing you want to do, and what those negative thoughts might mean about you. It's a trap. If your brain is saying shit to you like "should/shouldn't have" or "always/never" it's cue right away that whatever your brain is saying is not true. Positive affirmations will help.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yo1pJ_D-H3M

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