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Yeah, people definitely don't understand that you can cut so much and bargain hunt the whole thing and still spend 15-20k. That's a"cheap" wedding. The average in my area is 33k. That's not because people are just spending frivolously and don't budget, that's because every single aspect of a wedding is expensive. Hell, tipping out the bar staff and photographer alone is expensive.
Skip it if you want, but even as a very frugal person, I'm very happy we had a huge party with lots of food and an open bar. It's worth it to spend money on life rites. Life rites are like half the point of being human!
If you don't care about celebrating with friends and family, don't spend the money, but for us sharing the day with the people we love and merging our families was important.