this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2024
211 points (93.4% liked)

Ask Lemmy

26980 readers
1248 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 96 points 3 months ago (4 children)

If you’re falling in love with someone who’s “perfect” you’re probably falling in love with someone who only exists in your head and not the real person. That’s a disservice to everyone involved.

[–] intensely_human@lemm.ee 32 points 3 months ago

Also, if your parents were abusive, be deeply skeptical of “love at first sight”.

The most amazing connection I ever had with a partner led to the worst abuse I’ve ever experienced.

[–] steeznson@lemmy.world 20 points 3 months ago

I've heard a 'crush' being described as an absence of knowledge about the actual person you are fixated on. It reminds me of the story Robert Pattinson told where he took his stalker out to lunch, bitched about his life for an hour, and then never saw her again!

In my case:

If you're falling in love with someone who's "perfect", you're probably falling in love with someone who has an undiagnosed mental illness and is very good at pretending to be the person she thinks you want her to be, for a while.

She will spend the next 6 years making your life very, very miserable.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Where the fuck were you 30 years ago??? I was in 8th grade, and I was OBSESSED with (girls name redacted).

14 year old me saw wedding bells, and wild sex nights, and babies, and a house.

40 year old me knows I was just horny, and she was just putting out horny flirty vibes. I don't even know her favorite food!

[–] nikaaa@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

yeah same, kinda