catarina

joined 1 year ago
[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 2 points 8 months ago

That's so nice, hope they were full of love and peace in the end ๐Ÿ’Ÿ

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 36 points 8 months ago (2 children)

What are they to do?
Shrinking discretionary budget, more and more responsibilities at work (multiple roles condensed into one), and a looming sense you are easily replaceable with layoffs and AI tools.
On the other, if you are taught your only worth is your job, there is no point in exploring outside of that, and spending your energy on things that won't make you a good worker.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I get the argument for getting a job, though. Here is my perspective: I would find something I could do part te, and that I felt was really useful. I have consideredany times working in a nursing home with elderly people - being able to help them and hopefully even bring them some joy would benefit me, because my personal sense of purpose is tied to collaborating and giving back to the community around me. Plus, it's the type of job no one wants to do; if money weren't an issue, and I didn't have to put in 40+ hours a week, I would be happy to pick it up.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 2 points 8 months ago

I had been trying to go off my antidepressants for a while, and tapering it off is the recommended way to do it. However, there are still side effects, and dealing with the side effects while having to stay on my normal work routine and stress was too much for me.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 19 points 8 months ago (6 children)

I took one month off on unpaid leave. Not only did it confirm that I didn't miss a thing from my bullshit software dev job, those were 4 busy and productive weeks, with many projects I had left on hold. Plus, I felt much better in terms of health. It allowed me to taper off an SSRI. And I lost weight too!

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 2 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

I don't know you or your mind, but from that, it sounds busy AF.
That's not what a mindfulness practice is like at all. To be clear, I wasn't referring to a dictionary definition of mindfulness, but to the Buddhist meditation kind. In mindfulness meditation you would be working to get to a completely different state, where you simply observe, instead of analyzing.
I could be projecting, and I apologize for that, but I see myself a little in what you described: I used to scan myself all the time, and think of things to fix and improve, dwell on what I did wrong and what I am going to do better tomorrow, think through many moral scenarios and arguments so I would act in a sound and correct way. That's fine and very valuable.
It is also why mindfulness was hard for me to get into - because I couldn't be inside my head like that all the time. It is almost the opposite of that. It's hard to step aside from that torrent of thoughts, especially if you are an introvert and used to tapping into that rich inner world. Mindfulness meditation is training your mind to reach a sort of silent tranquility, a blank slate where you can draw your true intentions on and then maybe reach deeper insights. It helped a lot when I accepted that we are not entirely rational, even when we think we are acting purely on logical thoughts. We need to connect somehow to that latent emotional side, to recognize it more often. And this only clicked on my late twenties, until then I thought I could just think myself into any desired outcome (spoiler alert: it didn't work).
I am sure there are many resources out there that explain this better than I can. My point is introspection != mindfulness.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 2 points 8 months ago (3 children)

That's a common misconception about mindfulness that I fell - and sometimes still fall - for. It's not about knowing a tool or framework, and using it when you think you need it. It is not debugging a one off. It is a practice. You do it as a routine, and it slowly shifts how you face the world and yourself. It's not the answer we are looking for, especially in a crisis, it's not a fix. It's a change, it takes the rest of your life, and it's not a linear system of inputs and outputs.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 7 points 8 months ago

Cool article, I feel like I learned more about linked lists in a 5 minute read than over a few classes in college.

Plus, I love that it references Vera Molnar - hand executed algorithm art is not that widely known, and people always look at me as if I have two heads the first time I bring up the topic.

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 10 points 8 months ago

It would be beneficial for all here if you could learn to not take things so personally, and take in some fair criticism about this particular post. But please stick around, the topic of the article is definitely interesting, thanks for that!

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 32 points 9 months ago

I love the sentiment: "just don't die because it's awkward AF". If "joie de vivre" doesn't make you cling to life, there's always social anxiety even after death ๐Ÿคฃ

[โ€“] catarina@kbin.social 21 points 9 months ago

Nice misogyny you got there

 
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