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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Baileythenerd on 2024-03-05 18:58:29.
In eons past, I was once a youth.
Growing up my parents were pretty big on teaching their best and only child how to do things himself. This, in parent speak, meant that I was taught chores very young- I have been helping do laundry, dishes, the lawn, and cleaning since early elementary school.
We all took care of the laundry, doing everyone else's along with ours when needed. So, there were rules in place- Any change found in the dryer became the property of the person unloading the dryer.
8 Year old Bailey was extremely distraught one day to find that my fortune of TEN WHOLE DOLLARS had gone through the wash, and was claimed out of the dryer by my dad. I. was. FURIOUS.
I demanded back the $10, but my lovely dad reminded me of the rules, it was his to keep- fair game. At this point I decided that I would be the only person to unload the dryer.
My parents were very pleasantly surprised that for months they never had to pull out the clothes and start the folding process (since I'd just grab the laundry and fold while binging Cartoon Network).
Eventually, what started as a desperate attempt to guard my various petty treasures gave way to the perfect opportunity for malicious compliance.
You see, this was the very early 2000s, my dad wasn't yet keen on keeping all his cash on cards. So he kept most of his money in cash.
On this particular day, he left $200 in his pocket, and, doing the laundry meant that it was mine! ALL MINE! I silently stuffed the cash in my tiny coin bank in my room, pleased with my lucrative haul.
Eventually, my dad discovered that he was short a large sum of money and tore apart his office and bedroom looking for it, before he recalled that he had left it in his jeans pocket. Despite my subtly, I was quickly confronted.
The rule was rescinded, and I was only allowed to keep $50, but again- to an 8 year old, this was a king's ransom. I had emerged, mostly victorious.