Me: Just one small coffee thanks.
America:

People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.
RULES:
Me: Just one small coffee thanks.
America:

Actually, American chains like IHOP have coffee denial down to a science, the mug is just about as small as one could reasonably allow, and the ceramic is almost an inch thick. All because someone in middle management did some math in hopes of a promotion a few years down the road on how to save as much money as possible on coffee.
"I said a small coffee, not a minuscule one!!"
Me : I'd like a black coffee please
USA : And how much whipped cream and sugar would you like with that?
I know this is a joke but if you ask for black coffee or unsweet tea, you will get what you are expecting in most cases. They may ask as a courtesy if you want sweeteners or creamers with that because many people wish to sweeten their drinks themselves as they may prefer artificial sweeteners or wish to control their dairy or sugar intake for dietary reasons.
When they reach for the 16oz paper cup after i order a cortado...
Just ask for an Americano, and you'll get a watered-down espresso that's almost an American 'small'!
Europeans don't tolerate shit cheap robusto coffee. The brown sour water Americans drink is the typical quantity over quality model.
Americans mostly drink Arábica beans. The only Robusta coffee out here is in Vietnamese style coffee filled with a ton of condensed milk.
some of the cheap stuff like maxwell house is a mix of arabica and robusto.
The difference between an European and American cup of coffee is that the former doesn't contain 70% palm oil, high fructose corn syrup and artificial flavorings.
TIL I've only ever been served "European" coffee here in North America.
Yeah but it has 400mg of caffeine.
39% caffeine by volume
The thing is you have one of those every twenty minutes all day between cigarettes.
Americans generalizing the whole of Europe again. In Germany, a large coffee is certainly not the American size, but it's also not the small Italian size.
I drink a giant travel mug of black coffee every day. I have no excuse. It’s my only joy.

Here ya go! I sanitized the blue checkmark Nazi platform from the meme. Now it’s shareable.
That's because "A Coffee" means 'an espresso', as my Portuguese friend told me. She also told me that "Lemonade" doesn't mean sprite like it does in the UK, much to my dismay when I asked for one in a restaurant.