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Critics have warned that lowered hiring standards and slashed training times will lead to an explosion of abuses by immigration officers

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[–] klammeraffe@lemmy.cafe 74 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Let’s all join ice and not work

[–] DrFistington@lemmy.world 54 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Honestly... Like I've thought of that. Get 100k+ a year, and then just slow roll, mix up numbers on paperwork, distract people with conversation so nothing gets done, etc if you had a loose internal network of accomplices, you'd at least be adopting the tactics that worked for your enemies. At which point you can learn to refine and counter

[–] klammeraffe@lemmy.cafe 31 points 2 weeks ago

Right. Just rusty cogs all working together to quietly bring the machine to a halt.

[–] Deceptichum@quokk.au 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (4 children)

And when you’re part of a team of 10 others as you pull over your van and get out to blackbag a 6 year old immigrant girl would you feel justified knowing that her terror you are personally contributing to is worth a few incorrect paperwork’s in a system that doesn’t care about the law?

[–] chocrates@piefed.world 19 points 2 weeks ago

If this becomes the 3rd Reich insiders will be important.

[–] ramble81@lemmy.zip 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

It keeps happening regardless, so why not do what you can as an insider. You need people on all fronts against a facist regime

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

How many times do you think we could get away with accidentally tasting our co workers?

Edit: Or Tasing them, I guess one could try tasting them though. Might throw them off hurting immigrants for a minute.

[–] ramble81@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I dunno, they might kick you out the first time you lick or bite them.

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

Tasing!! Stupid autocorrect.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

I've thought about it. They wouldn't have me, but even if they would, if you swim in the shit, you get it all over you. At some point you would have to do something truly terrible or blow your cover and quit.

If you stay you will have to keep doing terrible things. Shindlers list is a tragedy and part of it was that Shindler was part of the machine.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

valid argument.

counterpoint, would you feel vindicated if nobody was internally documenting and circumventing the process to ensure that five, not one, 6 years old are terrorized a day?

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[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago

It's certainly tempting.

If I wasn't already employed, in sure there's a way to get hired as an ICE agent for a full blown do-nothing position.

Hell, game the system right and you can be hired three or four times. I doubt their HR is worth a shit.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Good idea in theory, but you'd be facing a shitload of pressure from your fascist thug "colleagues" to commit all sorts of heinous acts and it's not unlikely that they'd go to great and violent lengths to force you to comply just like they do with their other victims.

[–] klammeraffe@lemmy.cafe 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Might be worth it to get their names

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Just be careful not to be seen writing them down. Literacy skills are a dead giveaways

[–] redsand@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago

Join ICE, spray tan your coworkers and work harder.

[–] cv_octavio@piefed.ca 68 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

America too fat to Nazi properly lol.

[–] BreadstickNinja@lemmy.world 38 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Tried to goosestep but all they managed was a waddle

[–] resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago

Foie gras-stepping.

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
[–] SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I still remember the "Day of the Rope" in 2020, when conservatives were going to all go into public at the same time to execute everyone who wasn't a nazi (yes really)

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/day_of_the_rope

They all stayed home and ate potato chip instead, and got laughed at. XD

[–] Doomsider@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Was this a real event? All I could find was this

" In the novel, the Day of the Rope was a day in which tens of thousands of white Americans were publicly hanged for being "race criminals" because of acts such as miscegenation or collaborating with Jews."

Certainly, many whites were hung to make an example of what happens when you don't back the status quo (aka the KKK). This is a fraction of the amount of black people hung, but it is still a reminder that no one is safe when you throw logic out the window and embrace hate/racism.

[–] Hugin@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

It was real in that it was talked about in some right wing groups as the big event where they take back the country. Day came and no one showed up.

Similar to the naruto run storm area 51 thing from a few years ago but racist.

[–] nixus@anarchist.nexus 32 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

...requiring 15 push-ups, 32 sit-ups, and running one-and-a-half miles in 14 minutes...

That's a stupidly easy test. I'm a programmer, gamer, and I have a bad back, and I can easily do that.

[–] AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Dude 1.5 miles in 14 minutes is not as easy as it sounds, especially if you aren't active

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[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Just to confirm...

Is it all that's listed in 14 minutes. So, the push-ups, sit-ups and the running?

Not just running almost a kilometre in 14 minutes?

[–] NotMyOldRedditName@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Its 1.5 miles not almost 1km.

So 2.4km.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago

Ah fuck, I got the conversion the wrong way round

[–] nixus@anarchist.nexus 2 points 2 weeks ago

Oh, that's a good question. I read it as the latter, but if it's the former, it would be a bit tougher. It's still not super hard, but it is tougher than I initially imagined.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Physical fitness tests?

Mental fitness tests?

Intelligence fitness tests?

Psychological fitness tests?

Moral fitness tests?

Or all of the above?

[–] toiletobserver@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 weeks ago

Meal Team Six...Operation Dessert Storm...Full Metal Snacket....Heavy Artillery...

[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 15 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Trump will start poaching municipal and state police to emigrate to become ICE officers via over-paid salary and benefits.

[–] thesohoriots@lemmy.world 20 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The one thing, though, is that police unions are damn strong and you’ll be drawing a nice pension while you beat your geriatric spouse through retirement. The ICE ramp-up was slapped together without any thought past a dumb cash grab. I doubt benefits, if there are any, will be honored.

[–] 100@fedia.io 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

the benefit is that you will get investigated for crimes after this admin is over

[–] porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 weeks ago

Haha, no way. It'll be "time to heal from division" and they'll all just go back to their normal lives, just like the Nazis last time. Perhaps one or two sacrificial examples will be prosecuted for show.

[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I don't know ... ICE has a budget bigger than the Russian military. ICE's budget is bigger than all other US local, state, and federal law enforcement combined. So I expect Trump to spend that on turning cops to ICE.

[–] fluffykittycat@slrpnk.net 3 points 2 weeks ago

They already are. And there's a cop shortage. And if they go back to being cops and then do police brutality the fact that they were in ICE before will immediately make it that much worse for them

[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Scary part is the physical fit ones are that much more psycho. Maybe add mental fitness criteria.

[–] Balaquina@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Mentally fit people wouldn't want to work for them.

[–] MapleEngineer@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Who would have guessed that a bunch of gravy seals couldn't pass the fitness test? Meal team six.

[–] Soktopraegaeawayok@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Where does one go to apply for an "ICE" job?

[–] Raiderkev@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Just follow the instructions on the Spotify ads

I dont use Spotify...

[–] whotookkarl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Probably wherever people who pretend to be cops and military hang out, civil court hearings? Militia weekend groups?

[–] Rcklsabndn@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago

Bass Pro Shops? KFC?

[–] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's an extremely easy test to pass.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Demands on how old you are and how much fentanyl you've done

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