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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Alkuna on 2025-10-05 07:11:19+00:00.
This story of malicious compliance was shared with me by my grandfather many years ago, so some details may be lost, and I am not sure about all of the job titles. However, I will do my best to convey the main idea as I recall it.
My grandpa used to work for the railroad as a Signalman. His role was to ride on the back of the train and use a lantern to communicate through signals to the train driver at the front. At that time, trains were much shorter than they are today.
In modern times, safety regulations are written in blood and have good reasons behind them. My grandpa said that back in those days, safety protocols were still being developed, and those working on the trains had a better understanding of what was truly safe and effective, as opposed to what the rulebook suggested.
A bit more information: the mechanism that connects trains is called a 'coupling,' and the two parts come together, lock, and they're solidly connected. Now, to compare the situation to LEGOs, you don't just delicately set one LEGO on top of another and expect them to connect. You have to put these bits of plastic together firmly enough to get that Snap! noise. Train couplings are similar, only we're talking about metal carriages that are weighed in tons, not tiny plastic bits measured in grams. So instead of a Snap!, you need a good, proper Bang!
Onward to the actual story!
The train depot had recently hired a new manager (I'm not sure if they have an official title, so I'll just refer to him as a manager), who decided to be very By The Book. He very quickly became hated by everyone, because the rulebook of the time was written by someone more concerned with creating arbitrary rules rather than ensuring that things would actually work.
Grandpa grabbed his lanterns and jumped into the caboose at the end of a line of trains. The engine backed up along the track to prepare for coupling, and the manager came running out, yelling and waving his arms. The engine driver and the manager argued back and forth, and even Grandpa could see the engine driver's exasperated sigh from the back of a train. Malicious compliance was initiated!
The engine slowly backed along the track until the couplings came together in a gentle kiss (or as gentle as two multi-ton titans can kiss). The chain of trains didn't even shudder. The engine driver then moved forward, leaving the line of trains behind. The couplings touched, but there was no Bang! to signal their connection. Grandpa signaled that it didn't work.
The train stopped, then slowly and gently reversed again. Another kiss, but no coupling. Pulled forward, backed up, tried again. Kiss. No coupling. This repeated for fifteen minutes before the engine driver and the manager got into another argument.
Grandpa said he could guess the argument:
Engine Driver: "This isn't working, and we're wasting time! We need to get back on schedule!"
Manager: "Nope! Keep following the book exactly! No deviation. The book says this will work, so follow the book until it does!"
Fifteen more minutes passed of Kiss. No coupling. Pull forward, back up, try again. They had been at it for 30 minutes by now, and the train was officially behind schedule. However, the manager was still insisting that they MUST keep doing it by the book.
Finally, someone higher up (the Depot/Station Master?) came along, trying to find out why the engine was acting like the slowest pendulum in existence and why they had wasted half an hour. After getting the story from both the Engine Driver and Manager, Depot Master finally told the manager to shut his howling screamer and let the people who actually work on trains get the job done. This stupid process had gone on long enough, and it was painfully obvious that the book was wrong.
The manager crossed his arms and was steaming. The engine pulled forward a bit more than by the book. The whistle blew its warning call, and then came in reverse at a good clip. Obviously not at full ramming speed, but fast enough to get the job done.
Bang!
The line of trains shuddered gently, then the engine pulled forward. The trains were FINALLY coupled. Grandpa signaled "All good," and the train got underway.
Grandpa didn't get to hear the reaming, but the manager looked like a little boy getting the scolding of his life as the caboose passed him on its way out of the depot.