Ask Lemmy

They need to be local or willing to help me move to them.

Online relationships are nice but I wanna cuddle. 😭

I still have to live with my vicious manipulative abusive ex for now until I can safely escape financially/logistically, and while we are very much NOT together, that's not an appealing situation for a potential date and I get that. I would also not want someone to feel like they had to help me get out, or like I was monkey branching into a new relationship, which is what my ex had done to me, which I didn't find out for some time, because that felt really bad for me when I found out, and while I don't think my ex deserves any considerate behaviour after the way he's treated me, I wouldn't feel good about myself for doing it.

It also feels really crappy to be middle aged and start all over with this, have to weed out the ones who aren't suitable, make an effort about the whole thing, and have to navigate a physical relationship with someone new, or find someone that shares my values.

Also sneaking around my ex would be potentially explosive.

Not going to lie though, having someone that makes me feel loved, tingly, excited, etc, and isn't a damnable monster would really be nice.

Similar educational and economic status and close in age. Essentially, financially independent and intelligent. However, my “single parent” status quite fairly keeps most people away. So I have given up.

Non drug user/smoker

Has an offroad-capable vehicle so she can meet/follow me to those gorgeous, quiet, unpopulated, un/less-polluted, green places I like to hang out in as much as possible.

Okay here's another one and this does not describe all of my potential dating partners, but a big amount of them.

People who have kids and declare that the kids are their whole lives; people who do not have kids, but talk about their dog like it's their baby.

It's wonderful to love your kids, and it's wonderful to bond with your dog, but to define your entire being around those is so unhealthy.

Many parents whose kids are already in university, and don't want much to do with them can often not let go. Often will spend their entire weekend fretting about their daughter or son who doesn't even want to talk to them and won't reply to their messages. Get on with life, lady. Get one actually.

And I love dogs, and I've tried to set aside and compromise on the "my dog is my baby" mentality, but it always comes down to that person being so completely disconnected from their own emotional core, you can never actually know them.

E: downvoters: "I took that personally"

When I am talking with them, I want to feel like I am having a conversation with ChatGPT.

I want someone who shares my hatred of apple and companies in general. A fediverse user who is smart and has common sense. On top of that I would also like someone who doesn't mind that im socially awkward and terrible at one on one conversations.

i want. But i can't

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