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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Agreeable-Freedom504 on 2025-09-13 01:24:53+00:00.
First-time poster, long-time lurker. I was told that this sub may enjoy my little bit of pettiness. This happened a few years ago, and it still makes me laugh.
Those were the college days, and I worked part-time for a chain of grocery stores. Pretty run-of-the-mill stuff cashier, bagger, occasional cart-pusher duty when they were short staffed. It wasn't a bad job, but our store manager (all right, let's just call him Gary) had a God complex. This guy was obsessed with rules, especially when they didn't happen to apply to him.
Whatever, we had this insane policy that you weren't allowed to be "on the floor" as a uniformed employee if you weren't clocked in. Something about being liable and following labor laws. Who knows. So technically you were supposed to clock in when you put on your apron and name tag, and clock out when you took off the apron and name tag. And once you were off duty apron still on or not you weren't their employee anymore.
So I arrive at work 10 minutes early, like I always do, and walk by the store to the back break room. Just passing through. Haven't punched in yet. Not even touching anything. Just existing.
Gary sees me and snaps his fingers at me from the bakery section like I'm a damn dog.
"Hi! You're early. Can you just run check for carts real quick? Front lot's lookin' full."
I glance at the clock. I'm 9 minutes early. I explain to him, "I haven't clocked in yet."
He shrugs. "It'll take five minutes. Just go ahead and do it now."
I repeat, "I'm not on the clock."
And this dude I swear goes into lecture mode. "This is why your generation does not have a work ethic. In my day, we did not watch the clock. We just got the job done."
Terrific story, Gary. I still didn't get up.
He finally grumbles, "Fine. Just clock in and go do it then."
No problem.
So I did what he asked. I clocked in. At that exact instant.
And from that day forward, I never, ever did anything if I wasn't on the job.
If I happened to get to the store early and someone asked for directions to some product? "Sorry, not on the clock yet."
If Gary needed someone to unload an unexpected delivery after the employee's shift? "Can't. I'm already clocked out."
If someone spilled a soda on me along the way to the time clock? Not my problem. Not my job.
The worst part?
A week later, Gary tries to call me at home on my day off because someone called in sick and they needed help on register. I didn't answer. He had left a voice mail telling me to "step up if I wanted to be taken seriously." So I kept the voice mail. The following shift, I showed up to work, handed it to the assistant manager, and asked if being "on call" was part of my job description. Spoiler: it wasn't. The voice mail had seemingly disappeared after that.
Word traveled quickly that I was just doing my job, nothing more, nothing less. A few co-workers chimed in. Morale didn't necessarily improve, but Gary certainly unwound after corporate got wind of the voicemail controversy. Apparently, encouraging volunteer labor wasn't a good look during a rumor of unionization.
I left a few months later for a much better job where they treated us like human beings. But to this day, whenever someone says "It'll only take a minute," I respond, "Cool. So you're paying me for that minute, then?"
My manager asked me to work off the clock. I did exactly what he asked me to do and only ever worked when I was clocked in thereafter. He did not like it. I did not care.