this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2025

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George R.R. Martin Finally Finishes Writing Sequel To ‘Erin Brockovich’ (theonion.com)

submitted 1 week ago by ZeroCool@lemmy.ca to c/theonion@midwest.social

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[+] StarryPhoenix97@lemmy.world 56 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

[deleted]

[–] Godort@lemmy.ca 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

George and Pat Rothfuss both have enough money in the bank that they don't have to release their books to the public anymore. They probably still write for fun, but neither will ever release anything again.

Honestly, I think thats fine. It's a shame I won't get to see the ending of either series, but I also don't have a shortage of things to read.

[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

At least Martin has some quality under his belt. Rothfuss wrote 1.25 good books and just shit on his fans.

[–] Flipper@feddit.org 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

How do you get 1.25 good books?

[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Write 75% of a book where the only thing that happens is a teenage boy describes his sexual prowess with a faerie goddess using terms like "tongue twister of the five winds" or some such bullshit.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Rothfuss has unironically stated that he's had trouble with the third book because he's matured too much to write that shit again lol

I personally didn't mind it in an unreliable narrator/mythic ballad kind of way but a lot of the problems it has is that it sure seems like it would require a literal interpretation to make the plot threads connect in the end.

[–] QueenFern@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 week ago

Read the second one, and you'll see

[–] skisnow@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

We hate how the two chuckle fucks executed the ending so they could go work on Star Wars. The bones were pretty good in bullet points form.

For me their mistake was

spoiler

wanting Danaerys' downfall to be a huge internet-breaking shock moment, that people would react to the way they did to Ned Stark's death or the Red Wedding. In their desperation to avoid spoiling the surprise, instead of a compelling 8-season study of her descent from idealism into madness we got Saviour Dany for six seasons followed by a small handful of half-assed "look, the clues were all there!" moments where she was put in a difficult position and chose the "I'm in charge, don't mess with me" option, followed by one of the most abrupt clumsy heel turns outside of pro wrestling.

[–] ZoteTheMighty@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

C'mon, ghost authors can create good conclusions to grand epics. Remember the 7th Dune book? And uhmmm... The 8th Dune book...they were just so memorable, we all read them...right?

[–] bradorsomething@ttrpg.network 4 points 1 week ago

I felt like picasso did a rough sketch and his kid drew crayon all over it and tried to sell it as his own art.

[–] dumbass@leminal.space 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's the year 3576, the cyborg army has devastated the northern hemisphere, society has crumbled and all that remains are tiny groups of survivalists, George R R Martins is still working on finishing the ending.

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

George R R Martins is still ~~working on finishing~~ three books away from the ending.

[–] Macaroni_ninja@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Must be a slow week in the US politics if the onion has time for any other topic :)

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 points 1 week ago

They needed a little break

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 week ago

This title got me in the same way as writing someone's age and name in a title

[–] fubarx@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

Ian Fleming's estate published a few more James Bond books after he passed away.

Book 7 may just end up that way.

[–] Coolbeanschilly@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

George is a hack.

[–] paraphrand@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Luck is the secret behind many “great” things.

[–] Onyxonblack@lemmy.zip 0 points 1 week ago

I met the guy at a signing. Total fucking loser asshole.

[–] OfficeMonkey@lemmy.today -1 points 1 week ago (1 children)

While I'm not 100% comfortable with his tithing, if Mr. Martin passes Sanderson could pull a Jordan.

[–] chaogomu@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Martin has already stated the he is not a fan of Sanderson's style, specifically in regards to being a potential contingency author.

[–] bradorsomething@ttrpg.network 10 points 1 week ago

He also finishes things, which must really piss ol’ George off.

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah, Sanderson is great at what he does but A Song of Fire and Ice is not that.

[–] Pringles@sopuli.xyz 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Sanderson himself has also stated he would not be interested.

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Which is why they'll bully Abercrombie into doing it (with money)