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Israel Angered as Holocaust Trademark Denied by World Court (ttrpg.network)

submitted 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago) by bradorsomething@ttrpg.network to c/theonion@midwest.social

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(Gaza) As hunger grows and relief aid is squeezed by IDF restrictions, Israel was dealt a harsh blow by world court today, saying that the word “Holocaust” cannot be trademarked by the jewish people. Israel had claimed protesters and dying Gazans were violating their rights to the term by using it to describe the wholesale slaughter of Palestinians in Gaza.

“This is anti-Semetic,” said rabbi Abraham Kaughman of the Israeli government. “Six million jews died in the true holocaust caused by the Nazis. We can kill everyone, every one of these people, and we’ll hit three million, tops. That’s not the same.”

“If they called it a pogrom, you know the Ukrainians wouldn’t take it.”

The US president also remarked during a golf outing, “you can’t call it champagne if it’s not from that region… none of these Palestinians are dying in Germany.”

Not all voices are against the ruling. Omar Hessah, a Palestinian man in northern Gaza, said: “my children are starving, please send us aid. This does not have to be a holocaust, please.”

But judges agree that while Israel does not need to kill these people, their death can be called a holocaust.

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[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 28 points 4 weeks ago (3 children)

I would have believed this if it was not posted in an onion community

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 15 points 4 weeks ago

I didn't realize what community this was until I read your comment.

[–] Laser@feddit.org 4 points 4 weeks ago

The US president's answer is too coherent and correct for it to be real. He would have blamed Obama for killing Jews instead

[–] fckreddit@lemmy.ml 2 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Satire is dead. Politicians killed it.

[–] pdxfed@lemmy.world 2 points 4 weeks ago

This is an oft made comment but I disagree; It's taken some haymakers but is still in the ring.

A 30 year old stick figure TV show that started off by catering to obscene teenagers is still so powerful as to draw a response from the spokesperson of The White House of "that show is completely irrelevant and unfunny and uncreative" within hours of its most recent episode this week. The insecure and dishonest don't realize how transparent it is to everyone else.

Speaking truth to power, even with art a 2-year old could do, will always be valued and impactful.

[–] NoneOfUrBusiness@fedia.io 5 points 4 weeks ago

“Six million jews died in the true holocaust caused by the Nazis. We can kill everyone, every one of these people, and we’ll hit three million, tops. That’s not the same.”

The West Bank: Chuckles I'm in danger.

The US president also remarked during a golf outing, “you can’t call it champagne if it’s not from that region… none of these Palestinians are dying in Germany.”

I hate myself for laughing at this.

Also it'd have been interesting to see what foreign policy expert Leo Sturbgetter has to say about this, but you can't have everything I guess.

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 3 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

A minor thing, but the Israeli government is not run by rabbis. Its relationship with organised religion is more like the pious hypocrisy of Republican America than the theocracy of Iran.

[–] bradorsomething@ttrpg.network 2 points 4 weeks ago

Yes, but a rabbi can be in government. The religious title was added to increase the hypocrisy of the statement.

[–] beardsley@midwest.social 1 points 4 weeks ago

Futurama is real.