this post was submitted on 23 May 2025
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The vice president has some advice for young Americans.

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[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 103 points 2 months ago (2 children)

One can imagine Vance as the type of person who spends a lot of time thinking about how other people have sex

[–] superfes@lemmy.world 88 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 53 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] Letstakealook@lemm.ee 30 points 2 months ago

Yeah... at this stage, procreating is a clearly unethical choice. I really feel sympathy for the children of today, their lives will not be great.

[–] redlemace@lemmy.world 25 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Yes, you need to buy a couch to fuck (on)

[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Let me tell you something: if a man could fuck a woman in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house

-Dave Chappelle

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[–] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 58 points 2 months ago

Just scrolling by, and...

Fucking lol.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 51 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Wait hold on

Tinder is a way to make babies, why would he want people off of Tinder?

[–] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 54 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Nobody is matching with him :(

[–] blakenong@lemmings.world 39 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] ThanksObama@sh.itjust.works 50 points 2 months ago (2 children)

He's just upset there isn't a version of Grindr for furniture.

[–] el_bhm@lemm.ee 11 points 2 months ago
[–] Oneser@lemm.ee 5 points 2 months ago

I'm sorry but this is completely unacceptable format for this media.

Can you please put this is a meme format and re-upload it as its own post? This image and caption needs its own safe space to be discussed in detail.

Regards, The world.

[–] watson387@sopuli.xyz 34 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I've had just about enough of this mofo's ridiculous eyeliner...

[–] YesButActuallyMaybe@lemmy.ca 9 points 2 months ago

I see him as a failed unsuccessull jack sparrow wannabe

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

The one compliment anyone got from Trump's first admin was that "smokey eyes" thing, and JD's just latched on to it hard

[–] Nougat@fedia.io 25 points 2 months ago

We had three, and they all hate you.

[–] TacoButtPlug@sh.itjust.works 23 points 2 months ago

Me to JD: get off my planet and have throat cancer.

[–] DarkFuture@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

Americans To JD Vance: Find something tall and fall from it.

[–] MushuChupacabra@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)

Nothing suppresses the procreation instinct quite like JD Vance speaking about procreation.

Edit: Here's an nightmare scenario I unfortunately thought of, and will now share it with everybody. Imagine JD Vance stumping for increasing the birth rate, and watching him awkwardly try to touch pregnant women's bellies while interacting.

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[–] Akasazh@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (3 children)

James Donald Bowman is a terrible human being

And I will deadname him every chance I have

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[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 19 points 2 months ago

Bold advice from a couch-fucker

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 17 points 2 months ago

Pornhub all the way...no nagging, no baby diapers or teaching nothing.

[–] NutWrench@lemmy.ml 15 points 2 months ago

Your masters want you to breed. Whether you can afford a child or not.

[–] HawlSera@lemm.ee 15 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Does he not know what Tinder is?

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Does he not know what Tinder is for? 🤔

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[–] match@pawb.social 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

does JD Vance know where babies come from

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[–] Fishroot@hexbear.net 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

what other useful advice is he giving?

tell poor people to get more money?

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[–] SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

We need to ban sex and genital obsessed religious freaks from being able to effect politics.

[–] Donjuanme@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago

Get off the couch and stop getting off on the couch, someone should tell this antidei fuck

[–] Kuori@hexbear.net 10 points 2 months ago

fondly remembering the fate of the last politician who told young people to get out and have sex

yamagami

[–] WatDabney@fedia.io 9 points 2 months ago

People end up with some truly bizarre beliefs when they're determined to decree what it is that made this country great and so could make it great again, but immediately reject the things that actually did make it great - good wages, progressive taxes and social services.

[–] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

Does he believe humans can reproduce asexually?

[–] Taco2112@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago

This American to JD Vance(and other Republicans): stop worrying so much about other people’s bedrooms, it’s the behavior of creeps and pervs.

[–] match@pawb.social 7 points 2 months ago

no breed!! ONLY preg!!

[–] Kickforce@lemmy.wtf 7 points 2 months ago

But what if I don't enjoy having a baby and would rather have a vegetarian meal instead? Not all of us are carnivores.

[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 7 points 2 months ago

but most people are on tinder to get off

[–] demizerone@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

The Glalthian Mining Consortium needs bodies, so get to procreating humans!

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Yeah, get moving building the slave class workforce they need to prop up the oligarchy!!

[–] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

What does he think people use Tinder for? Preaching the bible? lmao

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

guys don't pile on him. he doesn't know how babies are made because he only fucks couches. for him sex never leads to a baby couch so how would he know. for all he knows babies happen to people randomly, but more likely 9 months after they're out of town.

[–] BigPotato@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

He could just lie. He could say all the right things his base wants to hear about how things are unaffordable and how they're going to fix it. He could grand stand about how Trump is going to make babies great again or something.

But he just says dumb shit instead. Truly the blind leading the blind.

[–] Envy@fedia.io 5 points 2 months ago

Wish in one hand, fuck a couch in the other, see which one fills up first

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