This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.
The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/bitofsomething on 2025-03-21 09:02:44+00:00.
For anyone wondering, dish pig is the British slang for Kitchen Porter or “KP”. Essentially it’s carrying out the shit jobs in the kitchen, washing up mainly but then also peeling vegetables, mopping up etc.
I was studying at University, but would spend each Summer (about 3 months) in a coastal town, the two friends I shared a flat with had secured jobs in a posh hotel, one waiting on, the other being a sort of driver/concierge and were on relatively decent money. I had a sort of skater/surfer/homeless look going on at the time, so when I enquired about work at the same hotel, all they could give me was KP.
I was warned that the head chef was a monster, and he was, an absolute bastard of a man, who no doubt had some sort of inner game of torture going on where he’d do all he could to get the dish pig to quit. For example, after finding out I was vegetarian he made me remove the skin off 10 chickens.
I was bloody good at washing up. It is customary to simply leave soapy water on dishes and trays in the UK before stacking them to dry, which I find bizarre, so I used to rinse things. I also used to follow the directions on the commercial dish soap, diluting it to the recommended ratio.
But chef was not happy with this, he took me to one side and in his deep mumbled West Country grunt said “fuckin’ hurry up, don’t rinse and get more washing up liquid in there, these fucking trays are greasy”
So, I increased the dish soap dosage by about 1000% and I didn’t rinse a thing.
That morning, all but one of the cooked breakfasts were sent back as the food unsurprisingly “tasted like washing up liquid”. One couple left two days early and the hotel manager summoned the chef to his office. Chef was furious, but didn’t say a thing to me, just threw things around and swore more than usual.
After that day he took it easy on me and even offered me a job the following year.