Wanna be friends?
this post was submitted on 13 Mar 2025
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Do you play video games? Read books? Play tabletop roleplaying games? Knit? There are public and private discord communities for all of those things and more. Go find one and join it. I lost my two closest friends who I had known for almost 3 decades in a couple of years apart and realized that without those two I didn't really have any other friends that I hung out and spent time with, and I started really feeling lonely, and I'm practically a shut-in and don't make friends easily either. Fortunately I lucked into two things that made a world of difference: a couple of TTRPG discords that I am now decent to good friends with all of the members, and a private gaming community. Between them they have about 350 people in them, and I have made a point of hanging out with them and trying to make friends, and I've met quite a few people I get along with really well, and I always have people to play tabletop or video games with.
No, pretty easy to make friends. Closing in middle age, a bunch of variety of people in different age groups.
Don't know what advice would be real or helpful to you but whenever you feel like it's not worth it, don't pursue it. Whoever you randomly encounter that you like, keep hanging close to them. Make sure you're someone who makes things happen, don't just be invited to stuff. It takes effort at first but you shouldn't feel exhausted. If that happens (over and over, not once) you're not with your people. Make sure you have boundaries and demands, not in their faces but for yourself. Invite people to things you'd wanna do and if they don't like it that's ok, if they put you down for it, fuck 'em.
Something I randomly picked up along the way is the lifeguard motto (or whatever it's called,ni don't know...) you have to save yourself before you can save anyone else, it's an analogy, ok? Make sure YOU have fun first and then you can accurately see how other people behave and feel.
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