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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/TheDallbatross on 2024-06-21 23:07:14+00:00.
So I noticed today DoorDash is running a Summer Deals bruhaha where supposedly different restaurants are offering different types of discounts on orders.
Knowing DD's predatory business practices it's probably some lose/lose for restaurants if they don't participate, but listen...it's 100 degrees outside, it's been a long week, and a brother's HONGRY. At least I can still sleep at night ordering from some chain that can shoulder the financial hit, right?
And would you look at this - Wingstop is stepping up with a sweet-ass deal on boneless wings. Free 10pc on my order? Say considerably less and sign me up.
I rock on up to my cart.
I throw in a 10pc.
The hungerin' rumbles.
Eager to consume, I go to select my sauce...
And the ONLY option is "Atomic". ๐ญ
I checked their other boneless sizes, and the bone-in 10pc as well, and they all have every flavor listed. Wingstop straight-up intentionally said "You want us to dump off entire orders of free wings? All right. Sign on the line. But we're ONLY offering them in Satan's Anus flavor".
Was I disappointed? Yes. But I've got to give them props for complying with this corporate dictum in one of the most technically-correct yet overtly-violent ways imaginable.
Kudos, Wingstop.
You will not quell my hunger today, but you have earned my respect and future full-price business. ๐