this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2023
588 points (98.2% liked)

Memes

45414 readers
1237 users here now

Rules:

  1. Be civil and nice.
  2. Try not to excessively repost, as a rule of thumb, wait at least 2 months to do it if you have to.

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 25 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] bec@lemmy.ml 87 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Craved, obviously: it would be a bit embarassing and uncomfortable, but at least I would not be harming it

[–] spicytuna62@lemmy.world 37 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

If you're gonna have to pick between two shitty situations (pun intended) then you might as well choose the less harmful one.

Who knows? Maybe you have an undiscovered kink.

[–] Whitebrow@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago (1 children)

With a bidet attachment so it can slurp every last bit

[–] radioactiveradio@lemm.ee 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

What if it evolves a tongue and licks your asshole? Atleast if it hates it, it can evolve some safety mechanism like a fake poop pipe/mouth, or stomach acid idk.

[–] Holzkohlen@feddit.de 4 points 11 months ago

The tongue would be a bonus. I am too shy to ask for a rimjob, so this works out great actually.

[–] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 19 points 11 months ago

If the toilet is sentient, there should be consent on all parties included.

[–] The_Eminent_Bon@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

Better to be loved than hated?

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 53 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (4 children)

Toilet: YES! YES! S H I T. IN. MY. M O U T H.

[–] Johanno@feddit.de 15 points 11 months ago
[–] _danny@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago (3 children)
[–] LongbottomLeaf@lemmy.nz 5 points 11 months ago

Oh hell yeah. I had forgotten about this scene. Odenkirk nails it.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 2 points 11 months ago

I need an adult after watching that

[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 11 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Relevant

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] thisisbutaname@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 11 months ago

Take that you porcelain slut

[–] frobeniusnorm@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

shit in my mouth! Cause thats some real love

https://piped.video/watch?v=NvEOwY27gW8&t=1

[–] JustMy2c@lemm.ee 13 points 11 months ago

Would it try to wake me up at 6am because it's hungry, like my cat does? Would the sounds be cute or not? If cute, let it crave!

[–] GrayBackgroundMusic@lemm.ee 10 points 11 months ago

Allen Pan keeps asking this question on the Safety Third podcast and it's hilarious.

[–] nargacu83@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

I mean, it would be hilarious if your toilets hated you by calling you names every time you go take a dump.

[–] Num10ck@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago (3 children)

more importantly: which celebrity voice should it have while being like this? gilbert gottfried? samuel jackson? mike tyson? fran drescher? bill burr? sam kineson? paris hilton?

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

I like to cry on the toilet so I choose Hope Sandoval from Mazzy Star.

[–] PeWu@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago

Bob Ross 💀

[–] The_Eminent_Bon@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

Devito as Frank

[–] devfuuu@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago
[–] chaosppe@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Peeing while erect every day would be pretty difficult