this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2025
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While yes, the key thing is that at any point either party can say "nope no longer wanna do this", it's still a hierarchy, but it is mutually agreed upon. (Also, in reality, the sub has the ultimate control in bdsm because of the safe word, and if they don't something is very wrong)
Static unchangable hierarchies are what no one enters voluntarily (at the low end that is).
Even outside of bdsm, it can make perfect sense to establish a hierarchy for e.g. faster response times, or because one person is far more knowledgable about something. It's just important that the people on the lower end can always end it.