this post was submitted on 19 Jun 2025
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[–] Rose_Thorne@lemmy.zip 116 points 2 months ago (11 children)

"Easy to Use". I certainly hope so, it's a fucking spray bottle. What's the hard to use option? Waiting until a new moon to summon Ba-Kok, God of Chickens to ask for a stay of cannibalism?

[–] MonkeyBrawler@lemm.ee 35 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Bruh, if there's a "spray" AND "stream" option on my spray bottle, I'll just lock up with indecision. Ease of use is very important when dealing with spray bottles.

[–] Rose_Thorne@lemmy.zip 22 points 2 months ago

Do you need to cover a larger area? Spray.

Do you need precision, or to get a hard to reach spot? Stream.

Understanding what we need is the first step of action.

[–] FilthyHands@sh.itjust.works 25 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (3 children)
[–] AtariDump@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago
[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Super mega chicken? No, is legend.

[–] heydo@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago
[–] chaogomu@lemmy.world 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The "hard" option is to just get rid of the hen that turned cannibal. It's going to be just one, unless you're running an egg factory level operation. Give the hens more space and actual yard time, and most will stop pecking. The one that doesn't goes in the soup pot.

[–] qarbone@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Do cannibal chickens taste more like chicken, if you are what you eat? Can I compress a hyperchicken if I create a gu pot of chickens with the most chicken-rific umami flavour.

[–] chaogomu@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Sure, but it's easier to just add a pinch of msg.

[–] qarbone@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

You think I'm in the "hyperchicken gu pot" game because it's easy?

Maximum cruelty, maximum flavor.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)
[–] MBM@lemmings.world 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] qarbone@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Ffs, leave something for the rest of us!

[–] scathliath@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 months ago

The real questions, can we make hyerchicken hyperramen?

[–] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

I mean, it could come in suppository form....

[–] Rose_Thorne@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Have you tried shoving something up a species cloaca?

We'd have more dead chicken farmers.

[–] barneypiccolo@lemm.ee 4 points 2 months ago
[–] AtariDump@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Well then good news!

[–] Mustakrakish@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago

Rise, chicken. Chicken, arise.

[–] Illogicalbit@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Oops you drew the summoning sigils wrong again.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Ba-Kok, God of Chickens

This keeps getting funnier the more times I read it. Good show.

[–] defaultusername@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

No, it's only possible to talk to Ba-Kok, praise be His name, when the planets align.

[–] Bakkoda@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago

I think i just got to that part of Cult of the Lamb

[–] GreenCrunch@lemmy.today 2 points 2 months ago

It's serious business. The paperwork is a nightmare though. The rich farmers have lawyers to file the appropriate writs, petitions, and incantations to stay the cannibalism. For those without the money, going before Ba-Kok can be intimidating and challenging.