Elon, aka Office of Personnel Management, aka S.H.I.T.H.E.A.D.:
We encourage you to find a job in the private sector as soon as you would like to do so. The way to greater American prosperity is encouraging people to move from lower productivity jobs in the public sector to higher productivity jobs in the private sector.
Damn dude, this is so awesome, I’ve literally never been tied to this fuck through even consumption and now I have him pulling on my chains, at the best possible time 
The private sector can suck my dick. I’m not grinding my ass off for the sake of a bunch of upper management perverts and dimwit shareholders. Working at the Post Office kind of sucks, but at least I know there’s the pretense of being useful to the community first and foremost.
A fellow mailperson
It is nice to provide some kind of utility. Although I feel more like an arm of ecommerce most of the time… that and a junk mail delivery service lol.
No, listen, you are part of one the most reliable drug distribution networks in history. Your services literally save lives. This is not a bit.
Any day I get a LLV over a Metris is a good one, I'll say that.