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And I love it every time (lemmy.world)

submitted 11 months ago by Stamets@lemmy.world to c/rpgmemes@ttrpg.network

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Actually considering running my favorite one-shot sometime soon. Wondering if I should look around on Lemmy for some players...

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[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 24 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

My longest "one shot" ever ended up taking 52 sessions over a little more than two years. What started as a very simple local festival where the party tried to win a cooking competition led to (not in order):

one of the largest inns in town burned to the ground
one party member pregnant with twins from two different fathers (one of them a different party member)
at least six assistants of one of the other chefs dead by the hand of the one party member that has the worst combat skills
the same party member killing a local merchant with a single punch in the face after he was accused of stealing when the thief was really a different party member (the pregnant one)
one party member waking up in the Empress' bed with a black rose on the pillow next to him
one supernatural STD sent by the goddess of (essentially) sex, drugs and rock & roll ravaging the whole barony
the one session where they visited said goddess' temple being the only occasion where they were super PG-13

I know at least one of my players reads this community so feel free to add anything that I may have missed.

[–] Jesus_666@feddit.de 17 points 11 months ago

As one of the ~~perpetrators~~ players I have to issue a correction:

The supernatural STD was actually fully contained by pure accident. Patient zero ended up in medical care, the party (all of whom caught it) somehow ended up having intercourse with very few people despite their best efforts, and the one other person that did get infected ended up joining the party.

I'd also point out that the STD had to be invented to explain an absurdly improbable string of crit successes and fails on skill checks that led to a party member getting seduced by someone with so many negative charisma modifiers stacked up that he was less attractive than the ground he was standing on. And then it happened again right afterwards.

And that wasn't the only bizarre string of extreme die rolls: The combat-inept party member turning into One Punch Man involved a series of 17 rolls, 14 of which were either crit fails or crit successes. At one point dfyx threw up his arms and said that the punch (a crit, naturally) did an absurd 5d6 damage, which of course came up as all sixes. Then two party members crit failed trying to administer first aid.

Oh, and dfyx forgot to mention that one other party member one-critted a raging bull with a rapier but that was so mundane compared to the rest of this pile-up of improbability that it's easy to overlook.

That one-shot was cursed.