this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2024
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Christmas feels different to me this year. Is it just me? How does today feel to you?

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[โ€“] SARGE@startrek.website 9 points 12 hours ago

Not even a little. I went out in shorts and a t-shirt for about an hour, exchanged banal pleasantries with family until my anxiety got the better of me and I had to leave, sat in a room with no windows watching old shows and snacking, and am waiting until exhaustion allows me to sleep a couple hours until I go to work on one of the two days remaining on my schedule. After that I might not have any work for months unless I can find something close by that doesn't make me legitimately contemplate things. I have a broken tooth, some kind of respiratory thing going on, and an unmentionable medical issue that really needs to be seen by a doctor but I can't afford one and my government insurance was denied because I made a couple thousand more this year than last year.

On the bright side, my truck is finally working again and assuming the now-slowly-leaking-while-on fuel pump doesn't catch a spark before I can afford to have it replaced I don't have to share a car this week. Which is nice.