this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2024
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No one shakes a vending machine. Its part of gen-x schooling to learn you rock the machine back just a bit and then let it settle back on its feet.
What are they teaching kids now, if not that?
I know some (genX) people who discovered a neat trick to dislodge all the contents of a vending machine. Involves at least two people and a 2x4. I wouldn't call what is done "shaking" per se, but you can be sure when the vending machine gets set back down, it feels mighty shaken up. And also empty.
But that would be dangerous, so don't do it.
Why would smashing the glass require two people?
Its not glass, it's typically acrylic and doesn't shatter easily. And no, the machine was typically left unharmed, if bereft.
I get it, but the joke was right there and I had to take the swing.
I only know Vending Machine lore from Hollywood because they're a lot rarer where I'm from so in my head "vending machine = shake" checks out.
No, you punch it until it releases your goods.
Um, there were more than a few Gen X that got hurt by vending machines. We didn’t have an immunity to that.
However, a skill we did have to exploit vending machines in the pre-digital age was to learn which alternating buttons you could press rapid-fire to get two sodas instead of one.
My GenX uncle broke his shoulder checking a vending machine over a Snickers bar
Dude needs more calcium, or possibly more Vitamin D3
Or an anger management class
Definitely that.