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How do I stop slef sabotage and procrastination? (mander.xyz)

submitted 2 days ago by Mothra@mander.xyz to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I used to be good at time management and very motivated in my career. Then about two years ago I lost a close friend over a strong disagreement and then lost my job.

Slowly but surely I became a bit depressed and had some physical health issues. I'm seeing a therapist already, and a few months ago I finally managed to get a plebe job at a retailer, but when it comes to doing my personal work that would open doors in my industry I just can't seem to find the time and motivation to do it.

Don't get me wrong. I got plenty of time available, I just find myself being ridiculously avoidant or distracted or tired, you get the idea. And, no, I don't use social media much, I don't videogame or binge shows. I just get distracted with house chores or simply overthinking.

I've already tried lists, planning and goal setting ( all this comes naturally to me), but it makes no difference.

I've tried reducing the expectations and goals, no difference. I still don't do anything.

I tried apps to keep track of my progress; also useless.

I've even considered finding a life coach, but I get the feeling they're a scam. Unfortunately I don't have any friends or relatives that can help me stay on track with my goals.

TLDR I'm getting a bit desperate here. Any suggestions welcome. Thanks.

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[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Imo, guilt and/or fear is holding you back from the industry. Forgive yourself and everything else about the past situation somehow. Every job has the potential to be different even in the same industry. There are a lot of books and techniques that help to process blame, guilt and fear. This and what everyone else is saying.

[–] Mothra@mander.xyz 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I agree with you. My problem isn't rational understanding of what's happening to me but actually finding a method to get over it. To make an analogy, knowing what disease you have doesn't make it go away.

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I sent you one that I use probably everyday. It's amazing how we make decisions that our brains try to help with, but gets messed up because they conflict. Your therapist should be able to help with more.

[–] Mothra@mander.xyz 2 points 2 days ago

Thank you, I'll give it a try!