peppersky

I'm now at the pool and swimming and feeling better sorry for posting so much

i dont know what ill do if nobody writes me today

i wanted to go swimming but i cant if i just feel like crying all the time

i havent lived enough to have feelings like this

i saw a video yesterday of a couple having their first date and he brought her home and then they hugged real long and they were both glowing and i just want to die

i sent my one friend in this city a picture of my bike that i finally got from my old place and all i want is for her to react to it, but she won't for a few days and she'll tell me that she doesn't look at her phone that much but when we were hanging together on friday she literally deleted her spam mails while we were talking like come on

ive got all the fucking time in the world, barely any responsibilities, i am surrounded by people with similiar interests half the year and i still cant find any friends. and then you go online and read a thousand people writing every day about how they had tons of friends in university and then got married and moved and are now just too busy to socialize ever and that theyve lost all their friends how am i supposed to ever feel good or ok or fulfilled socially i am not a weirdo im just too much of a nerd and too much of a non-nerd to ever fit in anywhere

i just want someone to say good morning and good night to me and to be there for me when i need them and not to be alone all the fucking time. nobody wrote me yesterday. nobody even acknowledged my existence. i dont want to live like this. this is hell. im crying. i dont want to cry alone. i want to cry with other people. i want to cry in someones arms

The country formerly known as east germany

made this soup with roasted vegetables and tomatoes and if anyone wants it theres still half a pot left

Bluebberry