The thieves slipped in and out, making off with eight pieces from France’s Crown Jewels at the world’s most-visited museum — a cultural wound that some compared to the burning of Notre-Dame cathedral in 2019.
Oh, come on. False fucking equivalence, and "some"? "Some" people would probably say it was aliens. Attribute or GTFO.
Now that I've finished the story, another thought: Who cares? I mean, are we really assuming those jewels were acquired aboveboard? This is

"You're trying to steal what I've rightfully stolen."