this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2025

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Kid Names (lemmy.dbzer0.com)

submitted 1 week ago by Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/whitepeopletwitter@sh.itjust.works

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[–] djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone 33 points 6 days ago (4 children)

At my job, I come across a lot of children's names. So many, that I can actually sympathize with parents who want an odd name. Names are supposed to be a unique identifier, so if you wanna name a kid "Revolution Fighter" or "Czarlanda," I get it. I can certainly find a kid with that name in our databases faster than I can find a "John Anderson" or an "Adam Wu."

What really kills me is parents who name their kids a normal sounding name, but with an insane spelling. I'm talking like "Shelley" spelled "Schelei" or "Alexander" spelled "Alexzander." You're not being clever or cute, you're just going to make your child's life unnecessarily harder as they have to spell their name out every. single. time.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 17 points 6 days ago (3 children)

We still have about 5 years before the first wave of incorrectly-spelled Khaleesis start showing up at county courthouses en masse.

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[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (3 children)

I read this a while ago (scroll down into section II for the graphs) which conducted a survey to see how happy people were with their names. The consensus seems to be that, for the most part, people just want names that don't annoy them constantly. Very common names rank lower than less common names, until the names become very uncommon. More normal or traditional names rank higher than more modern or creative names.

The conclusion I drew was that people want a normal name spelled a normal way, that is not too common. Why? Because if your name is too common, you are always confused with other people (cue saying "Michael" in a crowded room and having 5 people turn towards you). But if your name is too uncommon, people will constantly mis-spell and mispronounce it, so you will constantly either be correcting people or having to ignore it. If you have a common name with a unique spelling, then people will always misspell your name unless you spell it out for them. And of course, if you are named after a sci fi character or a name that rhymes with your twin, you will probably be bullied for it in middle school.

So if you are naming a kid, your best bet is to look through the current common baby names and pick one somewhere between 100 and 1000 most popular, after eliminating weird spellings or names that can easily be turned into mean nicknames. Bonus points if you can tie the name into your cultural heritage or you have an admirable anscestor to name your kid after.

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[–] bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 days ago (2 children)

That spelling of Alexzander a lot of times comes from non American countries (maybe Czech? Unsure)

Look at Alex Lifesons real name lol. I cant spell it

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[–] Hikermick@lemmy.world 20 points 6 days ago

It's a child not a vanity plate

[–] state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de 23 points 6 days ago (1 children)

So many people don't understand that children are people and people have rights. You are responsible for your children, you don't own them. If you don't like that, simply don't have kids.

[–] Comrade_Spood@quokk.au 15 points 6 days ago (1 children)

To the people downvoting this, you are the problem.

Children are people, not your property. You owe your kids a loving, caring, and supportive environment because it was your choice to have them. They did not choose to be born, they did not choose you as parents, they do not owe you anything. If you treat them well, they will support you and love you. If they do not, then you did something wrong.

If you think your children owe you anything, don't have kids and go see a therapist.

[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 7 points 6 days ago (2 children)

I think they are downvoting because of the implication that having a not-cringy legal name is a legal right. In almost all places, it isn't. The general sentiment of the comment is correct - you shouldn't do stupid bullshit to your kids for your own amusement. But saying it is a "right" is incorrect in a very weird way.

[–] Comrade_Spood@quokk.au 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I do think its a right for people to not have stupid cringey names. Thats part of why you can legally change your name. Unfortunately, as far as I am aware, children are not granted that ability and are thus stuck with their shitty name their parent gave them.

Do I think naming your child Jahckqylynn is child abuse? No, but should children be condemned to 18 years of living with that name because their parents are cringey and dumb? I also think no. Now naming your child Margarita Corona? Yes that is fucked up and borderline child abuse

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

They can legally change their name before 18, in merkkka anyway. But yea its harder as a minor, and outside of last name changed for marriage its a lot of beaurocratic bs, ie time and money. I dont mean to counter your point, its a valid point. But for any Jackleneighs or whatever the fuck whod rather be Jackies, or Jackies whod rather be James, its possible sooner than 18. Again it be easier to wait tho...

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[–] laranis@lemmy.zip 12 points 6 days ago (3 children)

Worst I've seen: Shithead

Pronounced: Shih-theed

Spelled: Shit head

[–] lightnegative@lemmy.world 8 points 6 days ago

Sometimes things dont translate well to English. Like the common Indian surname Dikshit

[–] johnyreeferseed@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 6 days ago

I had a kid in high school with the same name. It was a normal name in his country. Everyone just started calling him Shitty and he embraced it lol.

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

This next guy, hes a real poth ead.

[–] MyNameIsIgglePiggle@sh.itjust.works 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I attended my kids award ceremony (he's 10) and there were multiple girls ages 11 and 12 called Khaleesi and I shook my head

[–] stray@pawb.social 8 points 6 days ago (2 children)

I get naming your kid after a cultural figure, but it drives me nuts that so many people believe her name is khaleesi.

[–] MountingSuspicion@reddthat.com 9 points 6 days ago

Plenty of people might actually think that, but Prince, Queen, Princess, and different variations in different languages are common enough names already. It's possible plenty to most of those people just like the title and know it's not her actual name. Not directed at you, just some people might not realize that the phenomenon was popular before GoT existed.

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[–] krooklochurm@lemmy.ca 9 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I wish I was named kitchenaid whiskey jones

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

You can always change it

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

You can tell they made up that second name by looking for random objects in the room lol

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[–] RIPandTERROR@sh.itjust.works 2 points 5 days ago

I knew a Richard Raper. As an adult.

Name changes aren't that expensive 😒

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I know if a person whose legal first and middle name is margarita corona

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

2020 was probably especially trying for her.

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 days ago

The Motel doesnt have a problem with it, why would you?

Other notable pop references, if dated AF, a boy named Sue.

My recent favorite of a real person (I check birth certs and passports at work) was first name Independence, middle name Infinity Excellence. Im gonna change the last name, but it was akin to Smith.

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