this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 18 points 3 days ago
[–] deathbird@mander.xyz 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

What a beautiful way to honor his life's work of self-promotion and trolling.

Anyway, healthcare pls?

[–] BuckWylde@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Anyway, Epstein files?

[–] limer@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 days ago

If you work hard and are lucky, then healthcare can be obtained.

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 20 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Might grab one. Stick it in my coin collection next to the reichmarks my poppy picked up while killing nazis

[–] M0oP0o@mander.xyz 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Well you should have to kill a nazi for a trophy. Stolen valour and all that...

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

kill a nazi to get a coin commemorating a nazi's killing. Hmm. Better get another coin just in case.

[–] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Will probably be a MAGA coin that isn’t even legal tender so Trump can fleece his followers even more.

[–] hOrni@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago (5 children)

It'll cost as much as a gold coin but will be made out of zink.

It will be gold plated to be sold as "gold coin"

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[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 129 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Never Harriet Tubman though.

I wonder if there's a reason why? Anyone know???

[–] scarabic@lemmy.world 76 points 4 days ago (1 children)

She rescued what, a few thousand people? Kirk offended millions!

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 52 points 4 days ago

Mysteriously, so did Harriet Tubman.

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 23 points 4 days ago
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[–] M0oP0o@mander.xyz 12 points 3 days ago

Just collapse already! This is just getting silly at this point.

[–] poccalyps@sh.itjust.works 106 points 4 days ago (6 children)

Fuck, if we are putting streamers on currency I vote for Pokimane.

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[–] Rune_Walsh@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It would be fun to draw little X's over his eyes on every bill.

[–] T00l_shed@lemmy.world 28 points 3 days ago

They are coins, so drill holes in the neck

[–] KarlHungus42@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago

Ironically, the coin will be roughly the same diameter as the hole in his neck

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 33 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Fast forward to 2030...

" That will be 13 Kirks"

" Here's a Rogan and a Shapiro, keep the change"

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[–] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Surely toilet paper would be a more appropriate medium to carry his semblance.

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

On the new three-dollar bill?

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[–] echo@lemmings.world 50 points 4 days ago

What a fucking joke...

[–] f1error@lemmy.world 56 points 4 days ago
[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Isn't the dollar due to collapse due to foreign sanctions against the Trump regime tariffs?

Poetic.

New currency might be plastic.

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[–] kelpie_returns@lemmy.world 68 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (7 children)

I hate the idiots in charge of this country.

Does anyone living in a sane country wanna do a greencard marriage thing? I'm a good cook, enjoy keeping my space clean, and am a fairly experienced flatterer, if that sweetens the pot any.

.....pretty please? :(

[–] oxysis@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Anyone want to do that for me too? I might be disabled but I am very funny, I can do pixel art so I can make stuff for you, I have good style and can help you dress well, I can sew so I can mend your clothes! You can also have all my steam games!

Please get me out of here :(

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[–] HubertManne@piefed.social 15 points 3 days ago

these people have no sense of history.

[–] Geobloke@aussie.zone 7 points 3 days ago

Can't wait to use my kirk bucks at the strippers. It's what he would've wanted

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 19 points 3 days ago

Making the currency even more worthless...

[–] khannie@lemmy.world 36 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Ah lads..... You've gone too far now. C'mon. How in the name of sweet baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph and all his carpenter friends is this not an onion? C'mon now. Seriously.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 18 points 4 days ago (1 children)

The timeline jumped the shark. Reality is too absurd for The Onion to parody.

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[–] letsgo2themall@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

if they do, just draw penises on his face.

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[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 17 points 3 days ago

I assume Charlie-Kirk-Lied is going to be the party anthem too?

[–] don@lemmy.ca 27 points 4 days ago (8 children)

Misleading title, they’d be coins:

The bill calls on the U.S. Treasury to print 400,000 silver dollar coins with Kirk's face on them, Republican Representatives August Pfluger of Texas and Abraham Hamadeh of Arizona told Fox News. In addition to Kirk's image, the coins would include the message, "Well done, good and faithful servant." They would be minted with the year 2026 and his full name on them, according to Fox News Digital.

Also "Well done, good and faithful servant." is absolutely nauseating.

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[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Isn't the word "minted" not more correct as this is about commemorative coins?

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[–] yarr@feddit.nl 2 points 2 days ago

Technically, any image could be printed on new U.S. currency. Slow news day?

GOP plans have the follow-through ratio of a Chris Christie diet plan, so I'll believe it when I see it.

[–] HakFoo@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 4 days ago (4 children)

These coins will never circulate.

Commemorative coins like this are usually sold at a significant markup (even beyond the fact a "silver dollar" has about $30 worth of silver at today's bullion prices. Some of the markup is often set aside for a fund-raising purpose.

These will go directly into the albums of coin collectors, who to be blunt, tend to skew old, white, and MAGA. (If you go to a coin show, there will be plenty of right wing and Trump paraphernalia).

The ironic thing is that "really successful" commemorative coins tend to not appreciate well, because they glut any market. The most valuable modern coins tend to be either stuff that was deliberately underproduced (example: the 1996-W silver eagle that was only available with the purchase of almost two ounces of gold coins) or stuff that was ugly and unexciting and so they produced far less than the original allotment.

There are plenty of people who drag down their inheritance of 1970s proof sets, mail-order/shop-at-home products that are $10 worth of coin in $100 worth of packaging, high-markup bullion items, and market-glut commemoratives, just to discover that Grandpa should have bought AAPL instead. Often the "investment" didn't even beat inflation, and in the worst cases, they actually lost money in nominal dollar terms. I suspect a bag full of Kirk dollars would be a red flag to any appraiser in 2050.

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More repulsive white men on currency. Yay!

[–] selkiesidhe@sh.itjust.works 17 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Surprised the fat fuck hasn't ordered his own nasty face to be put on all US currency honestly...

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[–] Draegur@lemmy.zip 14 points 4 days ago

They're going to double, triple, quadruple down. They are prepared to die on this hill although they don't expect to. There is no reasoning with this scum.

[–] LoafedBurrito@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Nazi's do not belong on currency. Also he was a nobody podcaster. He will be forgotten about and he is just another right wing murder statistic.

[–] leftzero@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Well, with the coming hyperinflation they're going to need to print a lot of new notes, wouldn't be surprised to see his face on the trillion dollar note, usually used as toilet paper due to being much cheaper and more abundant...

[–] floofloof@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 days ago
[–] RedC@sh.itjust.works 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Silver dollar coins? Can't wait to buy as many as I can so I can melt them down and use them as Antifa challenge coins or something along those lines.

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[–] thelittleerik@lemmy.world 16 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

ANYTHING BUT TO RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES. FUCKING ANYTHING.

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