chapotraphouse

Maybe this is just my neurodivergence talking, but one of the most perplexing things I notice about other people is how they can just straight up invent an inaccurate charicature about you in their their heads and convince themselves it's totally real. So many assumptions that aren't true, based on pure vibes.

Humans are weird.

another day, another chance to express my gratitude that i'm not a billionaire and therefore still have at least a chance of being content in my life

r/truestl is the only reddit i check anymore but it still poisons my brain

cold harbor soviet -- wot if the daedric prince of domination tried to dominate the bourgeoisie though

The "if I'm nd, then it must have come from somewhere" realization is hitting lately. Really for some time now. But in the time I've been looking into my own nd, I've been noticing things in my family that scream "we're all diagnosed adults", except for my dad.

On the one hand its illuminating. On the other it also brings challenges in so far as what exactly that means especially right now when it feels like everything around me is just so fucked up. My brother has been giving me the silent treatment for a few months now. And I've noticed how hyperfocused my mom can get sometimes to the point where she just doesn't know what's going on around her even if its happening just a few feet in front of her. And there's other things I've noticed from both (like stimming) that make me go "huh". But its frustrating because it'd be hard to really explain, especially to my mom, who has pretty antiquated views on nd. For example some of the things she complains about my brother, like leg bobbing, make me want to tell her that's probably just him stimming, but she thinks its just a matter of selfcontrol and that its going to make his anxiety worse.

Everything is so challenging though and while I understand nd (my own and that around me) better now than I ever have, its still so difficult because of the weight of it all. I got really close to moving out and then guilt set in and I ended up staying home to help out my parents even though I haven't been able to find a way to improve things with my brother in particular. So I continue to just feel like shit because I'm here living with someone who I just don't know how to deal with at this point because we both have nd aspects that don't really mesh all that well.

IDK... I'm just venting/ranting. Today has felt so frustrating and I coming to the realization that the more I kind of stay on the same path, especially as it pertains to the people pleasing aspect of myself and masking in general, the more I'm going down this selfdestructive spiral.

the new naked gun is pretty funny. been a while since theres been a big budget proper parody like that

I should get "Big if true" print boxer shorts. It works either way.

The taking a nap community really fucked up letting them name that crime "kidnapping", if they tried doing that to me they would be hearing from my lawyers so fast

I don't understand why more people aren't talking about how Tails was able to synthesize a fake chaos emerald that was close enough to be able to be used in chaos control.

This should have been a world-altering event and people still only talk about Shadow smdh

Remember, when it comes to guerrilla urban warfare: pop one and run.

Only dead fish swim with the stream

:::spoiler had an hour long conversation with my ex over the phone. She spilled everything out to me, we touched on things from a long time ago, from a little bit later, etc. Her fears, as i figured, and so on. She is set. I need to change, which is understandable, but the timelines were hard to promise. She wants me to be someone she can still look up to. I want to be someone she still looks up to. I think I am, I just had a bad year. There's still so much love in her voice. I had my chance to be thankful for everything. I told her everything i missed about her. She was careful not to make me think there's a chance to get back together.

I told her the thought of her dating again hurt, she told me I shouldn't worry about it. There is literally no one around here, except people i dont really want to see. People came out to show support, but it wasn't very deep and meaningful, which turns out was the same for her.

I didn't tell her what i was doing with my day. I'm going to the Mamdani Town Hall today. I've already gotten the ball rolling with my change, and it'll start by being where people are.

I went to turn my oven burner on and I noted a huge glob of schmutz on the bottom of a pan support. How the hell did that— Oh, it's moving.

And it stuck out some surprisingly long legs. It was a crab spider and it must have thought it was on a branch and an insect dinner might be coming its way. Lucky for her - instead of dying a horrible death by fire - she got a free trip outside.

heard back from my area DSA. I’m thinking of joining it, my dad's opposed since it might hurt my career prospects but I'm an adult and I can make my own choices w/rt to that, so I'm gonna think on it over the weekend.

"They want transgender for everybody!"

Watching heat be like: why do the good guys always lose

Me and my friend just recorded our most disjointed and off-topic podcast yet, to the point where it turned into us going on a drunken nightwalk and encountering strange wailing and a lone white dog, and talking about the relative warmth of streetlamp colors and the vibes of an undeniably dying empire. Anything but the intended subject. It's time to accept that I'm way more interested in discussing the vibrasphere than movies. But no matter how bad it is, I'm still willing to pay the ten bucks a month for hosting because the badness is kind of the point, I'm willing to keep putting out this objectively meh podcast as a monument to friendship and gettin silly with jt

Life is strange fans when the people they sacrificed thousands to be saved gets survivor guilt instead of being le happy