this post was submitted on 01 May 2025
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[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 83 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You may fascinate a woman with a piece of cheese πŸ§€

[–] rockerface@lemm.ee 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I am not a woman, but I would be fascinated too

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 22 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

Fun fact: if you are ever on a plane with a crying baby take a slice of cheese and carefully place it on the babies face. The parents will be so happy with you for calming the baby.

I read that on Reddit at some point. It seems like solid advise.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Roquefort works best.

[–] A7thStone@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Do you need to use Elmer's glue so it doesn't slide off?

[–] dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works 39 points 2 months ago (1 children)

But the chicken looks like shit in a vase after like 1 day whether you water it or not.

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Rookie mistake, you forgot to take the meat off and bleach the bones. Sure, it's a lot of work, but a glass vase full of chicken bones is a time-honored legacy.

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 33 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Don’t you mean get β€œUs” a rotisserie chicken?

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 43 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You stay away from my chicken!

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Just hear me out, what if instead it was our chicken?

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 42 points 2 months ago (5 children)
[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago

They could have made him look more Staliny.

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[–] RejZoR@lemmy.ml 25 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Problem is, she's vegan, so she's against picking flowers and against eating chicken.

It's best you just save the money for a month or several and buy her LEGO.

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 29 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Get out of here oligarch. No working man has LEGO money in 2025.

[–] epicstove@lemmy.ca 11 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Lego is like the modern version of roman families handing down their armor and weapons to future generations BC ain't no fucking way they affording a whole new set each damn time the Gauls start acting up.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

If they'd had Lego they could build fresh armor to fit

[–] AngrySquirrel@lemm.ee 2 points 2 months ago

I really hope my mom hasn't gotten rid of my lego collection after I moved out like she did with my rocketry collection without asking me...

[–] 30p87@feddit.org 1 points 2 months ago

Especially when the old armor is solid metal, best quality on the market, while the new armor is plastic crap made in China, still trying to position itself as market leader.

[–] 30p87@feddit.org 7 points 2 months ago

And no oligarch will spend 500€ on a crap LEGO car when a real (used) one costs less. And while Cada has much better ones for 200€.

[–] chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Wait, why are vegans against picking flowers? Broccoli is a flower! It needs to be picked before eating!

[–] flicker@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 months ago

Lots of vegans, and non-vegans, are anti-picking-of-flowers, because if you leave them to live, they live longer and look prettier, instead of wilting sadly in a vase until they're fully dead.

So for some people, it's better to give them a live plant, so they can kill it by accident on their own time.

[–] nimble@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 months ago

Ive been vegan for more than a decade and most of my circle is vegan. I don't think i know of any vegans against cut flowers. The only argument i can see is that if you were cutting flowers found in the wild then you could be harming the environment which indirectly hurts the wildlife and pollinators. But i think most vegans would be ok with buying flowers. My wife and i also just grow our own and cut only a fraction of what we plant.

Btw if we're talking about Costco for chicken, they do have reasonably sized bouquets for as cheap as $10. And while that chicken will be gone in a day or two, Ive kept a Costco bouquet alive for my wife for a minimum of a week.

[–] RejZoR@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 months ago

Broccoli is for sustinance, picked flower will just needlesly die. :P

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[–] LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I’d be picking them bones, know what I’m saying?

[–] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Or you can get her a hotdog combo and still have $3.50 left to spend for yourself.

[–] IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Three fiddy?

[–] FiskFisk33@startrek.website 12 points 2 months ago

or, like, a whole egg

[–] tang999@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago

Just don't eat the chicken on the way home. You're asking for trouble.

As an AroAce women I think the choice is very obvious :3

(Especially if garlic bread is a side dish with the chicken and maybe a salad)

[–] Tattorack@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I can go out into a field and pick a whole cute looking bucket of flowers. Chicken it is.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

In that case, do both. Cause I’m already counting on chicken.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

The flowers?

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Also those Costco chickens are way better than regular grocery store chickens from like Safeway or whatever. They’re way bigger and juicier, I think they’re brined or something. It’s like other stores aren’t even trying.

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[–] Toneswirly@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Or get a chicken bake, a hot dog and a soda and still have money left over.

Edit: I just went to costco and their chicken bakes are 3.99 not 2.99 😭

[–] RedFrank24@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

The closest thing to flowers I ever received was a cactus. It died.

[–] CleoTheWizard@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Do the flowers also contain concentrated microplastics?

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

Of course! What doesn’t nowadays…

[–] breakingcups@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Those are complimentary

[–] WereHacker@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 months ago

It is mayday after all. The theme should be bread and roses. You should have your chicken and the flowers too.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I like how this users history is just animal communities and shit posting.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

What can I say, that’s all I’m good at πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

LPT: If you want to keep her, you get her both at the same time.

[–] FilthyHookerSpit@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago (2 children)

But I only have $5.00 πŸ₯²

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

A flower and half a chicken?!!

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[–] Hupf@feddit.org 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)
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