this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2025
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The Onion

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The Onion

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[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 63 points 5 days ago

Seems redundant.

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 43 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] normalexit@lemmy.world 27 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Only if you've met your deductible.

[–] meco03211@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago

Otherwise you will be kept "alive" as legally defined so that your existence might feed the machine.

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 27 points 4 days ago

The Onion casting wide.

But is it wide enough?

[–] oppy1984@lemm.ee 22 points 4 days ago (1 children)

As a current victim of United Healthcare, it wouldn't surprise me if this became true before the end of the year.

[–] MECHAGODZILLA2@midwest.social 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

My entire life was turned upside down, to put it mildly, because of United Healthcare. You have my sympathy, it is a truly awful experience. But you are not alone. Stay strong.

[–] oppy1984@lemm.ee 2 points 3 days ago

I can only imagine what hell they put you through. Right after they switched us to them our rates jumped, and at the end of the first year a bunch of people in my office (myself included) received letters from them telling us they would not be covering certain medications anymore. Most of us lucked out and were able to continue to get them for only slightly more than what we had been playing as long as we used a good Rx card.

One of my coworkers just had twins and they were early so had to stay in the NICU for a while. She's currently dealing with her 9 year old son, 11 year old stepdaughter, twin newborns and fighting with United because they say the NICU stay wasn't necessary.

Nothing like people's health care being decided by accounts who only care about increasing their employer's profits.

Side jag, I was self-employed for 12 years and didn't have health insurance, universal healthcare was something I was in favor of but not something that got me into the voting booth. One year with United at my current job and I'd vote for a Bond villain if he promised universal healthcare.

[–] Helvetica@sh.itjust.works 14 points 4 days ago

If you can get sick and the insurance ghouls can cancel your insurance to protect their profits then they've already sentenced you to death. People just ignore the reality until it happens to them.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 15 points 5 days ago (2 children)

She looks like the first victim whose corpse was brought back to life to make this announcement

[–] Rhaedas@fedia.io 5 points 5 days ago

The Walking Dead was never the zombies, it was the living trying to kill each other.

[–] Trihilis@ani.social 12 points 5 days ago

I really have to check nowadays if something is the onion. Most regular news items are weirder and more unbelievable than the onion.

[–] ef9357@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago

Well, she’s evil enough for this to be true.

[–] friendly_ghost@beehaw.org 4 points 4 days ago

I didn't even ask to be born, much less take a job with a UHC health plan

[–] JokeDeity@lemm.ee 4 points 4 days ago

🙁 I actually thought this could be real and I hate that.

What have they done to us? What did they do to us?!

[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

They should be grateful: receiving due process at all is no longer a right these days.

I thought that was Anya Taylor Joy