this post was submitted on 25 May 2024
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Asklemmy

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[–] Outsider9042@aussie.zone 39 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)
[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 19 points 6 months ago

.ǝʇɐɯ ɐu ,ɥɐǝʎ

[–] Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] Outsider9042@aussie.zone 3 points 6 months ago

Yeah yeah nah, nah yeah.

[–] absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz 3 points 6 months ago

New Zealand

[–] li10@feddit.uk 32 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You can’t polish a turd.

[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 10 points 6 months ago

I dunno, man... Look up coprolite. You can absolutely polish them.

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Having looked at some of the reports I have to clean up, I can tell you that yes, in fact, you CAN polish a turd

[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You CAN polish a turd but it's still shit

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[–] jaykay@lemmy.zip 31 points 6 months ago (4 children)

Polish - „you can’t make a whip out of shit” „z gówna bicza nie ukręcisz”

[–] Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 6 points 6 months ago

I think this takes home the prize for weirdest.

[–] downdaemon@lemmy.ml 5 points 6 months ago

I can sure as hell try

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 3 points 6 months ago

I like this one

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[–] mosiacmango@lemm.ee 30 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (5 children)

"You can't get blood from a stone" is classic in the US. "No more juice from the squeeze" is another variant.

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[–] viking@infosec.pub 28 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You can't pick a naked man's pocket.

[–] d41@startrek.website 23 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] ryannathans@aussie.zone 15 points 6 months ago

The prison wallet

[–] Synthuir@lemmy.ml 6 points 6 months ago

“Make sure he doesn’t pick your pocket!”

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 4 points 6 months ago

Challenge accepted.

[–] INHALE_VEGETABLES@aussie.zone 28 points 6 months ago (4 children)

You can hope in one hand and shit in the other, see which one fills up first.

[–] interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Oh my god, I did not expect to be hit with the wisdom stick THAT hard

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[–] baseless_discourse@mander.xyz 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

Dare I ask which country speaks words that cannot be truer.

Edit: saw your instance...

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

In sweden there is the same but with spit in one hand, wish in the other.

[–] baseless_discourse@mander.xyz 4 points 6 months ago

Sorry, sir, I like shit.

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[–] baseless_discourse@mander.xyz 22 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)
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[–] frightful_hobgoblin@lemmy.ml 19 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Probably the closest in Irish is "is deacair olann a bhaint de ghabhar" (it's hard to get wool from a goat)

[–] Outsider9042@aussie.zone 3 points 6 months ago

Depends where you live I guess. Mohair and cashmere come from goats.

[–] federalreverse@feddit.de 18 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I guess we use "Making gold from straw" (German).

[–] BottleOfAlkahest@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Isn't there literally a German fairy tale about someone able to make straw into gold?

[–] dojan@lemmy.world 6 points 6 months ago

Rumpelstiltskin.

Naomi Novik wrote a lovely book inspired by it called “Spinning Silver.”

[–] federalreverse@feddit.de 4 points 6 months ago

Yes, that's where it's from.

[–] JuanPeece@sh.itjust.works 15 points 6 months ago

You can put your boots in the oven, but that don't make 'em biscuits

[–] HauntingScience@programming.dev 14 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

“You can’t expect pears out of an elm tree” or “No le pidas peras al olmo”

[–] federalreverse@feddit.de 4 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

German for "like father, like son" is "the apple doesn't fall far off the tree trunk". But many people nowadays use "the apple doesn't fall far off the pear tree", which is a variant that I think originally was supposed to suggest illegitimate fatherhood.

[–] Instigate@aussie.zone 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

That’s interesting, because “the apple doesn’t/didn’t fall far from the tree” is a known Anglophonic saying that basically means that a child turned out a lot like a parent (gender not necessarily specified). I wonder if one is a calque of the other.

[–] GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip 9 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

The above poster isnt really correct. We have an actual saying that is the literal translation: "Der Apfel fällt nicht weit vom Stamm ". And it means exactly what you suggest, a child being very much like one of their parents in one way or another.

Like father, like son exists as well, "Wie der Vater so der Sohn".

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[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 13 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Lipstick on a pig along with others already mentioned.

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[–] WorldwideCommunity@lemm.ee 10 points 6 months ago (2 children)

In Australia there's "you can't polish a turd"

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[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

In Danish we have "you can't cut the hair off a bald guy"

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[–] very_well_lost@lemmy.world 9 points 6 months ago

"You can't put lipstick on a pig" was popular for about a year in the US, circa 2007

[–] Shou@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"Even if you give an ape a ring, it'll remain an ugly thing." -Netherlands.

[–] Bashnagdul@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago

A golden ring specifically

[–] zloubida@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago

If I understand the original idiom, the nearest French expression would be “you can't make a race horse from a donkey” (“tu ne peux pas faire un cheval de course d'un âne”).

[–] MerrySkeptic@sh.itjust.works 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

In the US there's the saying "you can't squeeze water from a stone"

[–] watson387@sopuli.xyz 5 points 6 months ago

I always heard it as blood from a stone, but yeah.

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit

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[–] CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

You can't paint the Mona Lisa with crayons.

Kind of related to yours, "You're putting lipstick on a pig"

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