this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2023
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Asklemmy
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I wish my parents-in-law would cut our life line. They're retired, too, and have a lot of time to make recommendations about your finances when we use a zero-based budget. They don't know the particulars of the budget...but that doesn't stop them from expecting impossible stuff. I just want to be free again...
So, my folks gave me a chunk of cash along with it.
It was basically "hey, economy is maybe going tits up. You're doing fine. Here's you're lifeline in cash. It's you when you were unemployed during the pandemic before the govt funds hit x 3years. Do with it whatever but we can't predict the future and you're doing ok and we're gonna need to budget the rest ourselves."
It's funny because in the same breath they were like "Christmas is gonna be slimmer this year. Don't expect much for gifts."
I'm super grateful. But it made me realize: I wish they calculated this number fucking 10 years ago. I know I woulda fucked up a chunk of it but Im sure I'd be better off today.
So, my advice to someone in a situation I was in a year or three ago would be to have an honest conversation with your parents. If you're financially responsible and debt free or at least able to save while making clear progress on that debt...
"Hey... Listen... I don't need an exact number. But I have a proposal. So be conservative here: what amount of my lifeline would you reach out and say "hey what's going on?" To get info?
Let's just say it's $250 in 1 month.
"Okay... How long are you planning on .. keeping this here for me? Until you die? You're what 70? Okay, so if you live til 90, then it's what? $60k? I'm asking you to just wire me 60k and let me start taking more responsibility.
Hell, make it 40k! Go on a wild vacation!"
Or suggest the two of you sit down with his or your own financial planner. Talk about how best to handle this, instead of taking advice from some dude named foggy on the fediverse.